What would you do if you won a HUGE lottery?

[Sarahfeena]

Not one of these paltry $1 or 2 million deals, but a HUGE payout/powerball type of thing...say, $100 million? What would you do with the money?

[The Original An Gadaí]

I'm not sure exactly what I'd do with the money but I wouldn't tell anybody I had won. I think it would disrupt one's life too much if everyone knew you'd hit paydirt like that. Here winners are anonymous unless they want to come out to the public, however our biggest lotto winner was involuntarily outed by friends of hers.

[Skald the Rhymer]

Not one of these paltry $1 or 2 million deals, but a HUGE payout/powerball type of thing...say, $100 million? What would you do with the money?

Let's assume the payout, after taxes, is $100 million. I'd throw a party to which I'd invite all my family & friends, including my hated older brother. for party favors, I would have a big check for each of them; how big would depend on the closeness of the relationship. The full siblings all get $1 million apiece, for instance. Except for the hated older brother. He gets a buck. Thus I make my feelings for him clear.

[Inner Stickler]

Pay off my student loans, put it all in the bank so that I get a nice monthly interest check and spend the rest of my life in school.

[Glazer]

Well we would have one hell of a Phantfest.

[Sarahfeena]

Yeah, Skald, I think each of my siblings would get a mil. I'd immediately hire someone to completely finish renovating the house so my husband wouldn't have to work on it anymore. I'd replace both of our cars, and get my husband the Jaguar he's been wanting. The rest I'd invest and probably see if we could both quit our jobs and start some small business or do volunteer work to keep busy doing something we enjoy more than we enjoy the work we do now.

[Orual]

Pay off my student loans. Pay off my sisters' student loans. Buy my mom a nice house. Hire a superlative financial advisor. Figure out out how to invest the rest of my money so that I can live off the interest (and provice a small stipend to the family members I really like).

Then I go a-traveling.

Oh, I'd probably endow a Classics scholarship at my alma mater.

[Myrnalene]

Well, I think $100 million is too much. I don't have a fucking clue what I would do with it. However, I have often made plans on what to do if I won a lesser sum, say $10-20 million?

1) Rent a very nice apartment. I don't want a house. I don't need anything permanent, and I don't want to be responsible for upkeep or any of that crap. I just want a pleasant, spacious place to put myself and my cats and the thousands of dollars in electronic equipment I would buy.

2) Keep my 2001 Corolla. I don't really give a shit what I drive. I would probably also get a Smart Car just so I could have the fun of parking it.

3) Generously support a small handful of people. My parents, my sister and her children, my maternal grandmother and my best friend would all be taken care of. Maybe a few other people as circumstances come up. Generous gifts to other friends and family as I see fit. Mild acquaintances or family members who would have had trouble picking me out of a line-up before I won the lottery can fuck right off.

4) Quarterly vacations. I would see every European city on my long to-go-to list, and work on the Americas and Asia too. Maybe Australia if I can keep it together that long on the airplane. I'm not taking about big blowouts at five-star hotels here. I would fly economy or business and stay at the same frugal hotels I am used to. I would always take a companion with me. First trip - taking my Tudor-loving teenage niece to London.

5) Continue my education. Study art, study history, study languages, study film.

6) Figure out which charities I wish to contribute to and set up payments.

7) Like everyone else, I would hire a good financial investor and hope to live off the interest.

[jali]

100 million is so much money. It's hard to imagine - I'll try. No newspaper or TV appearances.

1 million each for my four children and 1 million banked for each of my 3 grandsons.

I'd invest in the company I work for. I love my company. I'd love to bring back some of the people who were laid off.

$500,000 each for my sister cousins - there are about 8 who keep in touch with me.

1 million for my sister.

1 million to kiva.org for loans to entrepreneurs around the world.

I want to see Ireland, Wales, Tanzania, Egypt, Paris, South Africa, Ghana, Greece - well there are 53 African nations and 47 European nations - I'll be gone for a while.

I love apartment life and my apartment, but I'll move to a high rise in Buckhead - one that my company designed.

I have about 5 friends who I'd give at least 1/2 million dollars each.

I'd go on a book shopping spree - all hardcovers including some Jack Vance first editions.

I'd get my hair loc'd by a professional for once.

Massages every week. Oh, hell yeah!

I'd be in full cougar mode. Prowling with a credit card.

I would lipo the shit outta my thighs. Tummy tuck too.

I'd have a ball with acts of anonymous and random kindness. My ex husband #2 deserves a break, but he couldn't know it came from me.

I'd try fois gras and some good cavier.

I'd hire a team of cameramen to follow those snarky TMZ reporters to do a special report on each of them doing something stupid.

Go to a Muse concert. Go to see Jay-Z.

Get my DL back by paying that fine to NJ and buying another 5 speed Mazda 626. I love that car.

New roller skates.

[Taumpy]

My mother, aunts, sister, certain cousins, and nephew would get something (I can picture my nephew not wanting to accept or telling me to give his share to his mom, but I'd find some way to do something for him), and a couple of my friends would get some nice gifts too. Probably all of those people would get an open invitation too to let me know if they ever need anything.

I would look into starting a (or investing in an existing) charity to help transgender teens and young adults that are homeless or struggling because they have been disowned by their families with getting a place to stay, an education, employment, etc.

Sometimes I daydream about starting a business, but I'm not certain what I'd want to sell. A music store would be awesome, but CDs aren't really a growing market. I'd probably still give it a go.

I can imagine I'd probably buy a cottage on the outer Cape (Cod). Not Provincetown, too crowded. Either Truro or Wellfleet.

[RabbitMage]

I'd give a cut to my family, extending out to aunts/uncles/cousins. Everyone gets a set amount, now leave me alone damnit. My closest friends would either get a cut or some sweet benefits ('aw, your car broke down? Well let's just go get you a new one, alright?').

I'd pay off my assorted and comparatively minor debts.

Been thinking about some particular jewelry I might want to pick up.

I have a lot of existing charities in mind I'd like to fund as well as a few ideas of my own. Like Taumpy I'd love to make some kind of crazy Transhouse.

I'd like to travel before I do much else. There are a bunch of places I want to see, and if I could take a year to just travel on and off with no other pressing worries I think that would be amazing.

After that I'd like to buy a big patch of land-I'm thinking in Oregon-and get my dream farm started.

The remaining money would probably end up with an adviser and savings etc whateveryoneelsesaid.

[OneCentStamp]

I'd immediately give $10 million of it to Jesus*.

After that, I would drop everything and travel constantly until I got sick of it. My guess is about two or three years. I wouldn't travel in the most extravagant style imaginable, just because that doesn't interest me very much.

After that, it's all hookers and blow.


















* He's my gardener. Seems like a really nice fellow. It would be nice to let him bring the rest of his family over from Honduras in style.

[The Original An Gadaí]

I can imagine a scenario where you give $ (or £ or €) 1 million to family and some close friends and then others coming begging or some of the family coming begging when they've burned through the first million. "Come on! You've got like $80 million left!!!"

[Cluricaun]

I would drive a Monster Truck (specifically, Grave Digger) everywhere I went. If I couldn't find parking, bam, on top of other cars. Fuck you, I can pay for it.

I would wear a brand new tuxedo every day and order the old one to be burned.

I would literally force every single owner out of the down town area of a small US town, then elect myself mayor and change all the laws so that Main street would be nothing but titty bars, head shops, pool halls, gun shops and gambling parlors. I would also rename it Ryantown.

My house would be fuckoff huge and have secret passages and fireman's poles all over the place.

I would make Tiger Woods seem like an awkward 13 year old when it comes to the ladies.

[OneCentStamp]

I would literally force every single owner out of the down town area of a small US town, then elect myself mayor and change all the laws so that Main street would be nothing but titty bars, head shops, pool halls, gun shops and gambling parlors. I would also rename it Ryantown.

How about we combine our money and do it to Salt Lake City? Hell, we'd have the convenience of only having to deal with a single seller, since the Mormon church did precisely this about ten years ago, only they did the exact opposite with the property.

[hatesfreedom]

I've mostly decided to distribute the money to my entire family and pretty much any friend that is still with me (there are a shit ton of these). I don't really have any need for anymore money than it would take to live comfortably. So I'll buy a house with my portion of the winnings and play with my cats until I die.

[Cluricaun]

How about we combine our money and do it to Salt Lake City? Hell, we'd have the convenience of only having to deal with a single seller, since the Mormon church did precisely this about ten years ago, only they did the exact opposite with the property.

I'm in, but the new name for the town will be New Nauvoo.

[Revs]

After I paid off some debts and bought myself some bitchin' toys, I would buy an old warehouse and convert part of it into living quarters and leave the rest of the space open to turn into a music venue. Then I could finally organize concerts that are worth seeing, and not charge an arm and a leg for admission and beer. Repeat in a few different cities and boom, hello good music scene again.

[F-X]

I would spend my time posting all over the internets, complaining about how much free time and money I have, and how lonely I am, and then nail the desperate and needy chicks that contac me.



















Wait, I already do that.


OK maybe I would build a spaceship out of bacon.

[vison]

Keep farming until it's all gone.

[pepperlandgirl]

I would throw in with the folks in New Nauvoo and open a bunch of gay bars and porno theaters.

Seriously though, I'd pay off all my many debts, I'd buy back my childhood home (and surrounding property), I'd buy another house in California, I'd pay off my sister's debts, I would spend a full year following Wilco, and another year living in Rome.

[vison]

More seriously? I'd give some of it away, but not in lump sums right away, I'd set up trusts for a few people so that they had a few years to think about what they'll do with the capital.

Bonds, at, say, 3 or 4%, would satisfy me on the remainder. In some places if you invest in municipal bonds, the income is tax free. Failing that, bank interest, GICs, that sort of thing. I don't want to have to work on this. I've worked all my life, I'd like to just let the world turn without me worrying about it.

I'd build a new house, that's about the only thing I can think of that I want.

[Sarahfeena]

Oh, I forgot one...I'd set up an adoption foundation. And I'd make sure it's run ethically.

[Cluricaun]

Oh, I forgot one...I'd set up an adoption foundation. And I'd make sure it's run ethically.

I would buy out Sarah's orphanage and see that it's run as dishonestly as possible.

[OtakuLoki]

Off the top, 10% would go for charities.

Next 10% would be split along the following lines: House for my sister and brother-in-law; $1,000,000 trust fund for my niephling; guaranteed college tuition for my cousins' kids; a house for me (not because I want the hassles of owning a house, because it's easier to buy a house than to find rental property that allows dogs of a suitable size.); and pay to help my mom move out of her house.

The remaining 80% would be used to establish my dream charity: The Trofim Lysenko Foundation. The foundation would provide full-ride scholarships to people I chose who could write the best* applications indicating how they'd follow in the footsteps of that great man, Trofim Lysenko. I would choose two or three students, every year, who would get this scholarship, with a living stipend. There would be no requirement for field of study. For administering this Foundation I would pay myself a modest $65K salary, and just enjoy myself.



*Best being defined as those people who figured out that this whole thing is something of a joke, and that they are supposed to make me laugh with their plans for delaying, defrauding, and disrupting some field of study.

[AndrewRyan]

I'd purchase my way to the top tier of the Scientology secrets, hire a secretary to go wherever I go to answer my cell phone for me, and open up a cake shop in Baltimore that does what Charm City Cakes does cheaper and better, to put them out of business (you're welcome). OH, and buy a Harley Davidson Fat Boy.

[Cluricaun]

I'd purchase my way to the top tier of the Scientology secrets, hire a secretary to go wherever I go to answer my cell phone for me, and open up a cake shop in Baltimore that does what Charm City Cakes does cheaper and better, to put them out of business (you're welcome). OH, and buy a Harley Davidson Fat Boy.

I don't know you, but I like you. I'll give you a million dollars.

[F-X]

I thought the same thing!

[What Exit?]

This would be fun, I have some charities I really like. They would be well endowed.
I would buy a few cars I really like; a Tesla and 67' SS Camaro to start.
A large family compound with a huge heated work shop and garage.
My family would be set for life and several of my friends. I would travel a lot.

The largest amount though would be invested and I might try to bring about a centrist party if I could find some like minded individuals. A certain Mayor of New York comes to mind as the logical leader of this party.


Oh, season tickets to the Yankees and Giants would be a must.

[OneCentStamp]

I don't know you, but I like you. I'll give you a million dollars.

Would it shock you to learn he's my RL younger brother?

[AndrewRyan]

Would it shock you to learn he's my RL younger brother?

Quit bragging.

[Cluricaun]

Would it shock you to learn he's my RL younger brother?

Nah, that seems to figure really.

[Sarahfeena]

I would buy out Sarah's orphanage and see that it's run as dishonestly as possible.

[OneCentStamp]

Quit bragging.

Whatever. If you keep on admitting you like Paramore, I'm going to have to ask you to stop going by our surname.

[AndrewRyan]

Whatever. If you keep on admitting you like Paramore, I'm going to have to ask you to stop going by our surname.

......touché.

[Nrblex]

I'd buy some property, a fuckton of sex toys, and then put the rest in the bank.