Cooking
Does anyone here like to cook? What kinds of things do you like to make.? I'm kind of still learning the ropes but I do enjoy it. I also love enjoy trying the things that I make. I like making chilli, tacos, and kielbasi. I want to get more recipes in there. Pizza is fun to make as well.
I also love to bake. I find it so much fun.
Actually, yeah.Originally posted by Froody Blue Gem
During the final phases of my grad school career, me and my partner invested WAY too much time and money in basically doing everything in the kitchen.
Even before that, I'd developed some excellent skills as a baker and, basically, worked my way through a dozen or so cookbooks based on various national/ethnic cuisines. I got pretty good just as a single bachelor.
But when my girl at the time came along, we went nuts. Stainless steel industrial work-platforms. I'd already had the KitchenAid, but she brought from her mother's discard pile a shit-load of All-Clad cookware (of which I still have many), and all kinds of crazy shit.
I think as far as baking goes, my best effort was making a perfectly-shaped ciabatta. I've always made bread, but it's really a trick to make the loaf be the way it's supposed to be when it's done cooking.
I may have used a thermometer at that time, but certainly, I became attached to the oven thermometers with the steel cables, the rubber mallets for cracking treyf shellfish, everything.
Meh, I gave it all up a few years ago — it seems to me that I no longer desire to stuff ground pork into natural casings, I'll just get some Hot Pockets from the store.
Sad, but true — it's more fun cooking with another person, although I did enjoy in early college/uni days just preparing simple, correct fare.
Well, for pizze, one gadget I found pretty neat was a circular steel (thin) plate with a bunch of holes punched in from top to bottom.
But, honestly, I couldn't say it made better pizze than just a regular jelly-roll pan or a sheet pan.
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If you're already good at chilies, taco fixins and sausage making, I would say IMHO baking breads is probably the final frontier.
On the one hand, it's very easy to get something good.
On the other hand, it requires a good deal of art to get something top-notch.
I think IMHO making a great pizza dough is the best start. You learn about how to ferment the dough, do the slow-rise, how much to work the dough.
From there, a foccacia is a next fool-proof step.
From there, experimenting with shortbreads, like cornmeal-based or others.
From there, the boule-style breads would be next — big step up in terms of patience and equipment.
And, finally, the traditionally-shaped breads like a ciabatta or even a baguette (direct on the oven rack).
But there's a fork there, because you can do sandwich breads in the special pans — TBH I could never make them work and have the right texture.
At least for the last, you need a thermometer to watch the internal temperature of the dough from outside the oven.
At least I need one, since I'm not an old-world grandmother.
The BEST thing about learning to cook is you learn to sense or smell when things are ready — it becomes an intuition.
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ETA And the final proof! Roasting a chicken or a duckling to perfection. I wouldn't say it's "advanced," but it requires some close attention.
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EETA BIG shallow cast-iron skillet. IMVHO that's a baker's best friend. Just don't drop it on your foot.
Last edited by Jizzelbin; 29 Sep 2018 at 05:21 PM.
Oh, the food author John Thorne (sp?) had a good anecdote in one of his books about his massive failure at trying to impress some girl with his abilities at cooking rice.
Cooking rice, you know, in a regular saucepan with a good lid, such that it turns out correctly cooked, can be difficult.
I believe that's the best example of where one's sense of smell, awareness of timing, and probably some other stuff, comes together perfectly.
I'm not trying to brag, since one billion Chinese can't be wrong, but once you know how the cooking rice is supposed to smell and sound when it's done, you'd never forget it — you just know.
Oh, and forget about making croissants and more delicate pastries.
My father is able to make croissants better than anything I've seen commercially available in my town, but he's super into cooking, baking, anything kitchen-related, plus he's been doing it for a long time.
I can't even think about it without having my head hurt from the amount of labor and attention to detail required — that's like Jacques Pépin type shit.
Although I do recommend Pépin's cookbooks, especially his two "fundamentals" books, Method and Technique. Well, they're worth looking at. He does have other books.
Also, aside from one of the earlier editions of The Joy of Cooking, Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking really is the only "cookbook" one needs. No, I never saw the movie or read that lady's blog, but Julia Child is an outstanding example of how a good cookbook is to be written.
The nice thing about French kitchen-work is its emphasis on all basic techniques — once the good foundation has been secured, I find it's no trouble to adapt the methods to all kinds of other cuisines.
They do like their knife-work, though, which I find is not worth the trouble for home-style cooking. Aside from being able to handle a chef's knife reasonably well, and safely. TBH I never use a paring knife, ever. One big ten inch and a little six inch, and a serrated knife is I think covers everything for home cooking, plus a good potato/carrot/etc peeling device.
But if one is a fan of the Gallic-style "extremely methodical, everything prepared in a grid for quick reference," learning, then IMHO it's the place to go. I say, even as most of what I cook are variations on SE Asian stir-fries, rice-based meals, and some general American melting-pot-type things.
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ETA And, everyone should make a cheesecake at least once from scratch, with the springform pan. Those can be tricky, but barring a catastrophe in leakage, even a mediocre result is still better than none.
Also there is an Italian approach to cooking that is almost opposite to the French "fundamentals-first" style, but I think that's well-represented in the TV shows and things. I definitely learned some tricks from this school of thought in cooking — it really does work, especially for practical, home-style cooking. But I don't have any specific references, just various tricks and techniques that are invaluable.
Such as, making a bread using the "volcano" approach — put a mound of flour on a clean surface/cutting board, and sort of work the liquid in from an indentation you form in the center. Very much a good technique, extremely reliable.
Last edited by Jizzelbin; 30 Sep 2018 at 10:52 AM.
And a whisk/whip. And a heavy meat cleaver is nice — easily doubles as a dough-scraper for baking. And a rubber mallet. <insert line from Steve Martin in The Jerk>
Equipment? Large cast-iron skillet. 2-qt saucepan and/or 4-qt saucepan, each with tight-fitting lids. Stockpot. Cutting board or just a scrupulously-cleaned surface. Sheet pan is nice, but not necessary. Food processor or stand mixer? Not really needed. Stick blender? VERY handy device. ALSO, aluminum-core smallish frying pan for eggs.
Thermometer? For me, essential, but not strictly necessary.
Plus an abundance of clean, dry towels, large bowls/containers, and all that.
Oh, and a good spatula—rubber-ish, heat-resistant, is ideal. And the kind of "flipper/turner"-type spatula you might see the fry cook using at a diner is handy/
Oh, and for good-quality batterie de cuisine/cookware, I seem to recall that ... I think it's still "Ross" but one of those type stores. You can find some boss shit in stores like that.
And, why is cast iron skillet a baker's friend? Well, numerous reasons. You can us it as a heat sink in a hot oven, you can use water in it to ... well, create steam. AND, it's convenient for doing foccacia, short breads, or anything where you need a flat surface that can handle bitching-hot heat.
Plus, no better tool for doing meats or poultry (spatchcock, please!).
I just keep at least one in the oven at all times, for the perhaps dubious idea that it helps regulate the heat in my crappy oven. Yeah, if you cook steaks in them often on the stovetop, they can use some attention, but if you keep it nice and seasoned, it can do just about perfect for breakfast-style eggs as well as anything else.
No, basically not much equipment is required, although they can be fun.
Experience and a flair for experimentation is far more important, IMHO.
HOWEVER, I'm not joking about a BIG stack of clean, dry (DRY!!!) towels. Need that. ETA Note how I said "dry"? Yep. I'm like Quint from Jaws in that I'll never, ever use an oven mitt as long as I live. Damned good way to burn the shit out of your hand. Never touch any cooking equipment unless you can drop the pan safely or remove the handling device with a flick of the wrist. Easiest solution for me is to have a stack of dry towels handy.
Also, easy way to squeeze out water if you're making latkes. Yeah, I know you can use a ricer, but those never work so good for me, and I happen to own a very good ricer.
Last edited by Jizzelbin; 02 Oct 2018 at 12:54 AM.
Oh, for cooking rice such that it comes out perfectly 100% of the time.
NEVER use the directions on the bag. Those are wrong. I still use (roughly) the ratio of water to dry rice Alton Brown gave in some article/website/book. There's some leeway — I don't actually own a measuring cup, I just eyeball it.
But the idea is to starve the rice of water, and...well, I don't want to give away all my secrets, but just use the pilaf method.
And it depends on the exact saucepan you're using and your oven range.
Results may vary.
Also, no cats in the kitchen.
Ever.
Fortunately I think if you're cooking the right way, any kitties are going to be scared away and go hide in a pile of clothes or something.
It's not really cooking unless you're loud, fast, and abundantly cursing to yourself under your breath or to your partner.
And if you're slow cooking, which is a legitimate way, then the kitties aren't going to be a problem.
Just don't step on kitty.
HEY!!!!
You bunch of non-hackers who do not pack the gear required to serve in my beloved Corps!
Like the OP, I've enjoyed making sausages (stuffing into natural casings, not so much — basically I sold my KitchenAid and I never had the sausage-stuffing attachment).
But I've had a bunch of "pink salt" (no, that's not fancy salt, it's, like sodium nitrate or sodium nitrite used for producing cured salume) in a cupboard for a long time.
Ehhhhh.
No, I'm content with fresh sausages, although without the mixer, I'm not too enthused about noodling around with pork and marjoram and everything by hand/spatula.
Well, I guess the mixer went to a good "home" — some lady a few years ago wanted to buy it for like $150, which is about what I paid new for the 5-qt KitchenAid on some deal from Amazon, like, a lot of years ago, so I figured, meh, why not.
Related cooking question.
How do you people clean your kitchen?
I might be old school, but I think regular bleach in some kind of solution with water is nonpareil.
My dishwasher died on me a while ago, so while I hand-wash dishes and tools, I don't bother bleach-soaking them, just a thorough scrub + air-drying.
But countertops, definitely bleach.
Definitely bleach.
Wapner is on, definitely bleach.
"Ross Dress For Less" or "TJ Maxx" (sp?). I think those are national chains.
Also just hashbrown potatoes — OK, so maybe a food processor makes those easier, but IMHO, skillful use of a combination of a peeling device + whatever sharp knife fits your hand is OK, too.Also, easy way to squeeze out water if you're making latkes. Yeah, I know you can use a ricer, but those never work so good for me, and I happen to own a very good ricer.
I note: a good peeling device is sharp as shit, so if you ever had a papercut, magnify that times like a million if you're not super careful.
And, to restate, of course, the key to a good latke or hashbrown is squeeze ALL the water out.
Clean dishtowel's the best; IMHO the ricer is better for getting to the rough stage of puréeing potatoes, but it won't get all the water out, and your results won't be like you want.
Also, of course, ascorbic acid + potatoes is a good combination.
DAMN YOU!
Starting a cooking thread.
Just when I thought I was out....you pull me back in!!!!
Canned beans.
Cans of powdered cheese.
Pasta/Ramen/Rice.
Olive oil/beurre noisette.
Occasionally four hamburgers to-go from MacDo.
Beer.
And sometimes flank steak or ground beef.
I'm living proof that a bachelor diet not only keeps the kitchen tamed, relatively, but is more-or-less satisfactory.
And always keep a bottle of Worcestershire sauce in the pantry. I can guess the kinds of things you get up to, and Worcestershire sauce cleanses the palate if you drink enough of it.
I just cooked the most tasty chicken stir-fry with glass noodles. Totally winged it and it's amazing!
Yeah, man! Fish sauce or no?
No fish sauce. Not a fan of it, and I didn't have any. Mainly soy sauce with a dash of lemon juice. It was unreal.
Yeah, fish sauce is kind of tricky to deal with. I find it is better than it is, though.
Sounds good.
How's your peanut sauce? (You know, peanut butter, bit of soy sauce, some other stuff).
I reserve that for more Indonesian style dishes. I find whenever I mix too many Asian cuisines I tend to confuse myself and it doesn't taste very good. I make a tasty mi goreng dish with peanut butter, noodles, soy sauce, chilli, sesame seed oil and some other stuff. But afaik glass noodles aren't Indonesian so I went more Chinese flavours.
I just made the most delicious egg and pasta salad. Boil a bunch of pasta, add chopped up hard boiled eggs, add tiny chopped up bits of cheese, add frozen vegetables fried in butter, garlic salt and a bit of sugar, add parsley from the garden, smother with mayonnaise, then season with salt. I think I'll keep making this through spring/summer.
Well done!
I content myself with TV Dinners and maybe some hummus and pita bread. And liquid bread and either Scotch or Irish.
Maybe a burger or some fried chicken. Gotta clean my kitchen.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v= C-6mI708yWc
Haha there's no band quite like ZZ Top.
Yeah. I guess it's appropriate to say they were sui generis, now that Dusty Hill gone to meet his sweet reward in the hereafter. Or whatever. Don't tell the parish padre, but even though I'm now a fully initiated (i.e., sacrament of confirmation) Catholic, I don't know anything about heaven or hell....it's just a hobby to keep my Latin fresh and revive my Ancient Greek....plus lots of babes kneeling and bending over during mass.
Damn, I could go me some tacos about now: lengua, carnitas, a whole bunch of them. Damned hole where this wisdom tooth used to be kind of put me on a liquid diet.
Somehow I think I'll be able to show up at work this afternoon, with all the mental labor that Amazon requires of its best and brightest.
Ah, I lived off apple sauce when I had my wisdom teeth out. It was the only thing I could stand to eat. Do you have any days off you can take?
Yeah, I just had to take Monday off with Medical Leave of Absence, and my "weekend" is Tuesday and Wednesday, so was back at the grind today. At least I got to keep the two halves of the teeth! Damn dentist is married, though....always my luck. And yes, she's female....I checked.
The dentist didn't let me keep any of mine! 😡 I guess you'd still be feeling pretty ordinary after only 3 days off. But Amazon doesn't strike me as the kind of company that would give a shit.
no, Amazon doesn't give a damn, but we have really good dental and vision insurance.....no, shan't defend them. It's an easy job and I get to work with adults on a smaller team, more or less self-managing.
Tooth is fine....I was a bit worried about 'dry socket' but I just smoked cigs and drank beer and whiskey.....I think the main danger is pulling out the blood clot by suction, but I haven't sucked a dick in years, so pretty sure it's OK by now.
What am I going to do with this girl (well, woman, really).....it's challenging being with a woman who has some talents and a few common interests...but she's an actual alcoholic. You know I drink some when I feel like it, but that's like her hobby!
So back to cooking related, if I'm "forced" to sleep with her again....club soda for me. She can drink her scumbag dive bar crap into her grave. At least when I drink I go for a proper Irish or Scotch. So go team me!
Speaking of cooking,,,a few months ago my sister had a complete liver transplant. She did actually ask if she could keep it. You know, like fava beans and a nice Chianti. Not kidding. We're a weird family, you know. No. She didn't get to keep the liver. Not kidding, either! But I Dr. Ellen Krippaehne bagged up my wisdom tooth and word on the street is that one of my nephews will wash my car in exchange for half of one. Sounds fair to me.
Last edited by Jizzelbin; 19 Sep 2025 at 04:28 AM.
My wisdom teeth really took all the energy out of me, I couldn't just bounce back from them. I couldn't even play guitar for 2 weeks after, because my arms moving made the sockets hurt.
Yes, I know what you mean about the woman. Too unhealthy to stay, too much fun to leave. Just follow your shrivelled little black heart!
Liver transplant? That's full-on. Is she OK now?
Yeah, it was weird. She'd been on a waiting list for years, so no Mickey Mantle shenanigans.
And she's a licensed therapist...or was until she had her kids. So it's not as though she was completely reckless or uninformed.
Yeah it's kind of a big surgery....and she developed type II diabetes after the transplant....something about the way the pancreas and liver talk to each other with various secretions and hormones and stuff.
But she's great now.....down to her fighting weight, she looks good. If I weren't related to her and if she was much more stupid, I'd probably do her! I know that's disgusting to say, but a little gallows humor can be good sometimes, I find. Besides, I don't get involved with married women, much less those with kids. xD
It's a trip hanging out with a beloved family member who is full-on jaundiced: yellow eyes, skin, all that. She was like that for years while on the transplant list. But she looks better now!
I don't think anybody really knew she apparently was boozing it up so much. Maybe she just drew bad luck or somebody put a hex on her or something.
Last edited by Jizzelbin; 19 Sep 2025 at 05:23 PM.
Did she get to keep her placenta from when she had her kids?
didn't ask! she's not some dirty hippie! lol
Just leaving this here for no particular reason https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/...ng-with-placen
Well, I'm eating Taco Bell. That's sort of like placenta, I guess.
True fact, there is a little cottage industry involved in eating and cooking male ejaculate. Something to consider for the adventurous home cook.
Apparently slamming shots of horse semen is becoming increasingly popular in New Zealand. I don't remember seeing THAT in the LOTR series.
It's the younger generation. The Zoomers. They're all about eating ass and sucking off horse cock.
I just don't vibe with this younger crowd. Bunch of weirdos.
Eh, I think all age groups are mental, generally speaking. It's like a mental virus that 90% of the population is affected with.
Yeah, but back to the topic of cooking.....is it true that Scott Morrison, one of your former PMs, took a dump on a McDonald's restaurant table?
AFAIK it is absolutely true. He denied the poo aspect but no sensible person believes anything he says. Though I'd hardly link McDonalds to "cooking". That's like linking epilepsy to ballet. I haven't eaten any fast food for years. Even the smell of it turns my stomach. There is a servo near my home that used to sell nice "homestyle" meals, but now they skimp on the quality and quantity, and jack up the price. So I'm surviving off snacks and my own cooking.
I can't stand MacDo....the worst of the worst.
But, I don't know if you have those, I've been known to patronize a Jack In The Box now and then or a Taco Bell.
Food prices are insane at the grocery store....all I care about any more is getting the right amount of calories and something that doesn't give me food poisoning.
So, yep.....beer, liquor, and some pork rinds....I'm good to go! And decent quality pizza is good, fresh made from one of several shops to go. A slice off the top!
Nope, not the healthiest, but my blood pressure is sort of OK (marginal systolic) and good amount of physical exercise....meh....not doing so bad pushing 50 years of age, all told.
Nothing's perfect, anyway.
We don't have Jack In The Box or Taco Bell here, but I guess Taco Bell sell tacos? Yeah groceries are insanely expensive. I've taken to growing some vegetables in my garden to make sure I have something healthy to eat. I've got potatoes that are growing nicely, lots of parsley, some cucumber vines are just starting to go off, and yesterday I planted a lot of cherry tomato seeds. I can access chili from certain bits of public property (just have to know where to look) and I eat "native strawberries" (native to India) in a park nearby. There's a Brazilian cherry tree down the road so when it has fruit on it, I go down and eat my fill. I haven't had alcohol for years. Can't afford it, and I don't miss it that much. I'd really enjoy a pizza, though.
You should move to Finland: every Finnish person has the right to forage for mushrooms, whether on private land or not.
Plus the language is weird and very cool.
But sounds like you got it covered as far as growing your own private reserves.
I went to Estonia years ago and failed miserably with the language (which is very similar to Finnish). All I learnt to say is "tere" which means "hi". Went to a coffee shop and there was a type of coffee on the board.... the name of it must've had 50 letters in it, all one word. I said that can't possibly be one word. How do you say it. The lady just rattled it off like it was nothing. Did I tell you about the Finnish guy who reprogrammed all the patches on my guitar fx unit? He was a friend of my house mate, and decided to reprogram all 80 patches. I was... not happy. That's why I went to Estonia instead of Finland. Long-haired motherfucker. Though Finnish does have vowel harmony, which is pretty complicated but sounds cool.
It is very cool. The words really are strange....not too many loanwords from Indo European languages (which Finnish, like Estonian, is not)....but they're forced to learn Swedish and German in school (two of their former conquerors) and they all speak English superbly. Mmmmm....supper last night....big bag of potato chips and some 8.2% beer.....nice healthy fare!
Haha I spent 3 days wandering around Tallinn trying to get a haircut - in winter. It was ferociously cold. I had assumed that Estonians spoke English the way Finns do. Turns out: not really. I eventually settled for a hairdresser who was really hot, who proceeded to sheer my scalp as if I were a sheep and she was Jackie Howe. She accidentally made my neck crack multiple times. She didn't speak any English, German or Russian, so I tried to explain what I wanted then she pointed at the chair and did what she wanted. It was a memorable experience.
You could probably have learned the words to buy a scissors at a drugstore.....but then you would have missed out on the local flavor!
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