By controlling the amount of greenhouse gases we put into the air, we can control the temperature of the whole planet.
By controlling the amount of greenhouse gases we put into the air, we can control the temperature of the whole planet.
"Science and Mother Nature are in a marriage where Science is always surprised to come home and find Mother Nature blowing the neighbor."
Justin's Dad
If you get another PC Monitors working in front of you, you can get a suntan.
In the land of the blind, the one-arm man is king.
The government really does believe that by exposing people to high levels of gamma radiation they will, eventually be able to effect an anger based transformation, similar to the Incredible Hulk. This is why airliners fly so high in the atmosphere, to increase the gamma dose that passengers receive. It also explains why the TSA is being allowed to behave as such asshats: They're trying to make sure that all passengers are in the proper state of mind for the best effect from the gamma rays.
Swapping spit with a donkey at midnight on the longest day of the year, will ensure no ill-fortune will befall you for as long as the donkey lives; hence it is advised to catch the donkey at a ripe, young age, or have a good supply of donkeys.
Last edited by ivan astikov; 12 Feb 2010 at 09:59 AM.
To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.
Put a lemon drop on top of your radio for better reception.
If you fart three times in a graveyard, your soul will never reach Heaven.
If you say "No way!" in Urdu after a gloomy weather forecast, it won't come true.
Dye your dog red to deter fleas.
It's bad luck not to accept a cigar if one is offered.
A Coke a day gives you mercury poisoning.
90% of jewelry women wear today contain stones once owned by a dead person.
Apple Cider Vinegar poured on the ground in a circle around your house creates an effective barrier against demons.
Well this is true, but it is true of almost any liquid actually as long as you believe in it and make the proper ritual gestures.Originally posted by Zuul
But what if the demons don't believe in it?
Good question, in that case I suggest the use of Proton Packs.
Just don't cross the streams?
I don't think so, therefore I'm probably not.
Eating cockroaches wards off the plague.
Plus, they're high in protein and vitamin content!
I don't think so, therefore I'm probably not.
You both need to post to this thread.
Farting while under water will thin your colon walls.
"I won't kill for money, and I won't marry for it. Other than that, I'm open to just about anything."
-Jim Rockford
Heart disease is caused by masturbation.
That's a dirty damned lie! Masturbation is used all the time in nursing homes as a palliative treatment for heart disease.
Masturbation causes the Internet.
Not true, Al Gore caused the Internet, masturbation made it expand rapidly and grow large.
Seeing a bat by the light of a full moon means that any children you may have will be born blind.
Don't be alarmed though; if you catch the bat, remove the wings and wear them as ear-rings for a month, your genes wont be affected.
Last edited by ivan astikov; 08 Mar 2010 at 04:34 PM.
To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.
Ingesting monkey brains while pregnant will cause ADHD in your unborn child.
If you dream about a spider monkey, you'll have good luck for a week.
Inhaling salt through your nose will cure eczema.
"I won't kill for money, and I won't marry for it. Other than that, I'm open to just about anything."
-Jim Rockford
Vomit cures acne.
A heart attack can be treated with copious amounts of caffeine and hot sauce.
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