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Thread: Random stuff learnt from Olympics coverage

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    Elephant Feirefiz's avatar
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    Default Random stuff learnt from Olympics coverage

    Now, at the end of the Olympics might be a good time sum up all the little more or less useful pieces of information that we learnt from olympics coverage.
    • Although skeleton looks dangerous it is reportedly the safest sledding sport because of the especially low center of gravity.
    • A wobbling ass is considered a sign of good technique in skeleton.
    • Figure skaters sneer at ice dancers.
    • Figure skaters respect hockey players but whenever they share a venue they quarrel over the right properties of the ice.
    • Lindsey Vonn speaks excellent German.
    • When the German long distance cross-country skiers are 5 km from the finish they drink a bottle of lukewarm coffee/Coca-Cola mix.

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    Free Exy Cluricaun's avatar
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    I am sexually attracted to most of the Russian womens curling team.
    Hell, if I didn't do things just because they made me feel a bit ridiculous, I wouldn't have much of a social life. - Santo Rugger.

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    Prehistoric Bitchslapper Sarahfeena's avatar
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    You can get killed practicing for the luge.

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    like Gandalf in a way Nrblex's avatar
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    Curling exists.

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    Johnny Weir's effeminacy is a disgrace to the sport of figure skating.

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    like Gandalf in a way Nrblex's avatar
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    Johnny Weir is my king.

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    Yes, I'm a cat. What's it to you? Muffin's avatar
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    Muffin runs naked through the thread waving a Canadian flag while shouting "Most gold medals in a Winter Olympics for any country ever!"

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    Porosity Caster parzival's avatar
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    I am sexually attracted to most of the Russian Danish womens curling team.


    Also something I learned ... posts on Mellophant have a 3-non-whitespace character minimum

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    Oliphaunt
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    Evgeni Plushenko is a whiny little bitchboy crybaby.

    Biathlon is totally awesome.

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    Quote Originally posted by Orual View post
    Evgeni Plushenko is a whiny little bitchboy crybaby.
    Wait, he had nothing to do with any of that "platinum medal" bullshit. I won't stand for this insult to my disgustingly ugly boyfriend's honor.


    Biathlon is totally awesome.
    Okay, at this point we're going to have to discuss involuntary commitment.

  11. #11
    my god, he's full of stars... OneCentStamp's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Cluricaun View post
    I am sexually attracted to most of the Russian womens curling teamS.

    There, fixed that for ya.
    "You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."

    find me at Goodreads

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    Large member. AndrewRyan's avatar
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    The biathlon was probably created over a drunken challenge that sounded something like, "Oh ya dumbass!? I bet I can ski, AND shoot a rifle better than you!"
    Hell hath no fury, like a woman's scorn for video games.

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    aka ivan the not-quite-as-terrible ivan astikov's avatar
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    I'll start watching the Winter Olympics again when wrestling with polar bears becomes an event.

    Curling, ffs? What next, skipping stones across a lake?
    Last edited by ivan astikov; 01 Mar 2010 at 03:49 AM.
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  14. #14
    my god, he's full of stars... OneCentStamp's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by AndrewRyan View post
    The biathlon was probably created over a drunken challenge that sounded something like, "Oh ya dumbass!? I bet I can ski, AND shoot a rifle better than you!"
    I'm sure it sounded less idiotic in the original Russian or Finnish.
    "You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."

    find me at Goodreads

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    Yes, I'm a cat. What's it to you? Muffin's avatar
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    Yesterday on the chairlift, we discussed how the popularity of biathlon would increase significantly if snowboarders were used as the targets.

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    The Queen Zuul's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Muffin View post
    Yesterday on the chairlift, we discussed how the popularity of biathlon would increase significantly if snowboarders were used as the targets.
    That sounds horrible...and yet strangely awesome.

  17. #17
    Free Exy Cluricaun's avatar
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    Biathalon seems like a pretty natural sport to me. "It's snowing and we're hungry. Now what?"

    Why, ski around and find animals and shoot them. Biathalon seems like one of the only sports in the winter olympics that has a real world benefit. If you were trapped on the Matterhorn with Shaun White he could do some gnarly flips and shit while you starved to death, but the biatheletes would be knee deep in Caribou meat within an hour.

    Edit: I suppose you could try and eat Shaun White, but I suspect that gingers are toxic.
    Last edited by Cluricaun; 01 Mar 2010 at 09:08 AM.
    Hell, if I didn't do things just because they made me feel a bit ridiculous, I wouldn't have much of a social life. - Santo Rugger.

  18. #18
    my god, he's full of stars... OneCentStamp's avatar
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    Oh, here's another one: it's confusing and annoying that the opening notes to "O Canada" are so similar to the Olympic fanfare. They really should do something about that.
    "You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."

    find me at Goodreads

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    Oliphaunt
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    Quote Originally posted by Nrblex View post
    Curling exists.
    ...and it's not a put-on. It's an actual sport with, like, rules and fans and stuff.

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    Yes, I'm a cat. What's it to you? Muffin's avatar
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    So the head of the NHL wants hockey moved to the Summer Olympics, and the card game of bridge is applying to be made part of the Winter Olympics. You can't make this stuff up.

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    Free Exy Cluricaun's avatar
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    Bridge would be stupid, but the NHL has a legitmate worry about using players in the middle of the season who could get injured in Olympic play and really impact a teams chances at the Cup. We sent 5 players from the Blackhawks out (Kane on the US, Towes, Keith and Seabrook to the Canadians and Hossa to Slovakia) and while I enjoyed the level of play that the Olympics were able to provide, those are 5 of our top players and we have a legit shot to make the playoffs this season, and let’s not forget that these guys are contractually obligated to play for the NHL. I know it sounds stingy on the commissioners part to say “No more of this during our season” they have literally invested millions of dollars in these guys for their own benefit.

    Besides, I think that letting pros play in the Olympics goes against the spirit of the game as an amateur sporting competition. Shaun White and NBA players and anyone else who currently competes as a pro should be barred from the competition in the first place.
    Hell, if I didn't do things just because they made me feel a bit ridiculous, I wouldn't have much of a social life. - Santo Rugger.

  22. #22
    my god, he's full of stars... OneCentStamp's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Cluricaun View post
    Besides, I think that letting pros play in the Olympics goes against the spirit of the game as an amateur sporting competition. Shaun White and NBA players and anyone else who currently competes as a pro should be barred from the competition in the first place.
    The problem is, the current condition is a reaction to the 70s and 80s, when the USA would field teams of college kids against Soviet hockey and basketball teams made up of 25- to 30-year old men who had been state-supported (essentially professional) since childhood. Ditto for Cuban boxers and Chinese gymnasts, just to name two prominent examples.

    I don't see any way to put this genie back in the bottle and ensure a level playing field.
    "You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."

    find me at Goodreads

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    Free Exy Cluricaun's avatar
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    I’ll have to say that this Winter Olympics was one of the better Olympics that I can remember in terms of overall popularity for quite some time. I think that the ratings must have been pretty good, and I know I watched a lot of events besides just hockey (Snowcross is fucking metal as hell, those guys are nuts) but at the same time…….It’s just the Olympics. In perspective it falls somewhere just ahead of golf and somewhere behind professional tennis as something that I really give a good goddamn about. It’s not actually important like Baseball or Football or Soccer. It’s mostly made up of silly sports that nobody you know actually has ever participated in, or ever will. Not a lot of amateur Bobsledders at the Jr. High down the road. It boils down to chest beating nationalism for the big games, and “Sure, we’ll add to the medal count for a Bronze in Women’s Cross Country Skiing”. I think that it’s kind of stupid that sports that are played professionally with huge world wide audiences are even included.
    Hell, if I didn't do things just because they made me feel a bit ridiculous, I wouldn't have much of a social life. - Santo Rugger.

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    Free Exy Cluricaun's avatar
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    dup
    Last edited by Cluricaun; 01 Mar 2010 at 11:06 AM.
    Hell, if I didn't do things just because they made me feel a bit ridiculous, I wouldn't have much of a social life. - Santo Rugger.

  25. #25
    Oliphaunt
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    Back to the OP: I learned that fairly average looking women can be incredibly hot while cross country skiing in skintight suits.

    Especially, for some reason, if they're wearing headbands.

  26. #26
    Aged Turtle Wizard Clothahump's avatar
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    Cute girls skating in shorty skirts.

    Everything else is secondary.

    Political correctness will be the death of our country.

  27. #27
    my god, he's full of stars... OneCentStamp's avatar
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    Another one: I speak better French than the PM of Canada.
    "You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."

    find me at Goodreads

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