Characters That Were Totally Secretly Boning Each Other

Thread title carefully crafted to allow the inclusion of the occassional heterosexual couple. ;)

Prince Humperdinck / Count Rugan - The Princess Bride. First of all, the prince is clearly completely unmoved by the charms of Princess Buttercup Penn. What possible reason is there to stage the assassination on their wedding night? Wouldn't the people of Florin be even more moved by her murder after say, a year long reign with her performing various charitable works? Or even a month? The only reason to kill her right after the wedding seems to be to spare Humperdinck from the terror of comsummation. And I hardly feel the need to go into all the significant glances and tender concern that Rugan directs toward Humperdinck.

Trowa / Quatre - Gundam Wing. I don't know if anyone here has seen this anime except for Loki and I but this isn't one of the boy's love shows set in a magical high school and geared toward squeeing fangirls. This is a violent show for boys who like giant robots. But on the very day that Trowa and Quatre meet (fighting opposite each other in battle, mind you), they perform a musical duet on the piano and flute. Gay. By the end of the series, Trowa has sacrificed his life for Quatre (he got better) and they apparently have developed a psychic bond that allows each to know what the other is feeling. They are clearly a unit of two. I guess I could accept "non-romantic soulmates" as an explanation for this, but what fun would that be?

Ok go - films, comics, TV, books, whatever.

Bert and Ernie.

Gilligan and Mary Ann.
The Professor and Ginger.

The movie version of Mary Poppins and Bert of course.

No way Gilligan was getting any May Ann action.

Now the Prof. may have been getting some Ginger. Ginger seems like the type
to fall for the brooding intellectual.

Nah, actually the worldly Ginger was schooling the fresh-faced farmgirl Mary Ann in the ways of sapphic love.

As memorably set forth in Chasing Amy, Archie and Jughead were totally doin' it. :D

Jack Aubrey and Stephen Maturin. Totally. "Practicing our cello and violin." Is that what the sailors are calling it these days, fellas?

Dare I mention Holmes and Watson?

I think I do.

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Originally posted by Oliveloaf

No way Gilligan was getting any May Ann action.

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Did you ever think about why Gilligan always foiled the escape plans? He was getting it and never got it so good before the "accident".

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Originally posted by Rube E. Tewesday

Nah, actually the worldly Ginger was schooling the fresh-faced farmgirl Mary Ann in the ways of sapphic love.

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Well, maybe that too.

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Originally posted by Orual

Dare I mention Holmes and Watson?

I think I do.

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I think this was done in one of the 70s Sherlock Holmes movies and came close in the newest one.

Sad one: Dr. Smith probably got Will Robinson at least a few times. Though it was surely via drugs or alien technology.

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Originally posted by Rube E. Tewesday

Nah, actually the worldly Ginger was schooling the fresh-faced farmgirl Mary Ann in the ways of sapphic love.

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Now here's a lost episode I'd spend money on.

The Three's Company chicks. Jack was literally their beard.

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Originally posted by jali

The Three's Company chicks. Jack was literally their beard.

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This one makes more sense than most. The blondes rotate, but the same slightly butch brunette remains. Hmmmmm.

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Originally posted by What Exit?

Gilligan and Mary Ann.
The Professor and Ginger.

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I think you mean "Ginger and Mary Ann" and "the Professor and both of them."

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The movie version of Mary Poppins and Bert of course.

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I don't think that was a secret so much as it was discreet. They just weren't into PDAs, especially around the kids.

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Originally posted by Zuul

This one makes more sense than most. The blondes rotate, but the same slightly butch brunette remains. Hmmmmm.

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Janet was the brunette; the actress was Joyce DeWitt. I wouldn't call her butch so much as freaking hot. I never understood the fuss made about Suzanne Somers.

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Originally posted by Skald the Rhymer

Janet was the brunette; the actress was Joyce DeWitt. I wouldn't call her butch so much as freaking hot. I never understood the fuss made about Suzanne Somers.

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I felt like she had a bit of a soft baby dyke thang going on. Rawr.

Pep hasn't appeared yet, so I'll say Kirk and Spock on her behalf. (Though she might argue that it wasn't a secret.)

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Originally posted by Skald the Rhymer

Janet was the brunette; the actress was Joyce DeWitt. I wouldn't call her butch so much as freaking hot. I never understood the fuss made about Suzanne Somers.

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Originally posted by Zuul

I felt like she had a bit of a soft baby dyke thang going on. Rawr.

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She was very Joan Jett.

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Originally posted by Zuul

I felt like she had a bit of a soft baby dyke thang going on. Rawr.

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Your pronoun reference is unclear. Joyce DeWitt had the baby dyke thing going on, or Suzanne Somers?

http://www.streetbonersandtvcarnage....e_dewitt_3.jpg

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Originally posted by Skald the Rhymer

Your pronoun reference is unclear. Joyce DeWitt had the baby dyke thing going on, or Suzanne Somers?

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Joyce. The shag haircut is the dead giveaway.

Anyone every wonder if Laverne and Shirley were doing it their way?

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Originally posted by Oliveloaf

Anyone every wonder if Laverne and Shirley were doing it their way?

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No, I think Carmine and Laverne had something going on that Shirley never knew about. All the Italian guys I ever knew had the sweet, wholesome girl to take home to mother, and the "fun-loving" girl on the side.

What about Lenny and Squiggy?

Luke and Leia were totally bumpin' uglies between Empire and Jedi. Think about it, Leia was all distraught over Han being frozen and Luke was probably all freaked out over the whole Vader=Dad thing and losing his hand. Together they sought comfort in each other's arms.

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Originally posted by Revs

Luke and Leia were totally bumpin' uglies between Empire and Jedi. Think about it, Leia was all distraught over Han being frozen and Luke was probably all freaked out over the whole Vader=Dad thing and losing his hand. Together they sought comfort in each other's arms.

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That's not true! That's impossible!!!:gah:

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Originally posted by Orual

That's not true! That's impossible!!!:gah:

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You are correct. Luke & Leia never shared a bed until after the events of RETURN OF THE JEDI. They tried and tried to stop, but just couldn't help themselves.

In other news, I believe the Fox did Redival at least once. It was her idea, and he was drunk, but that would never have mattered if the King had found out. Much less Orual.

You do take delight in vexing me, Rhymer.

After having been properly chastised by Loki for forgetting about these two, I'm gonna have to mention Xena and Gabrielle. There's really no way they weren't involved. It actually truly perplexes me that there are still fans that don't accept this when they all but blatantly refer to each other as life partners, and the show openly refers to them as eternal soulmates that are a part of each other's lives in every incarnation. (yeah, I know. I roll my eyes at that too.) In fact, their "modern day incarnations" are married to each other.

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Originally posted by Taumpy

After having been properly chastised by Loki for forgetting about these two, I'm gonna have to mention Xena and Gabrielle. There's really no way they weren't involved. It actually truly perplexes me that there are still fans that don't accept this when they all but blatantly refer to each other as life partners, and the show openly refers to them as eternal soulmates that are a part of each other's lives in every incarnation. (yeah, I know. I roll my eyes at that too.) In fact, their "modern day incarnations" are married to each other.

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We've had this argument before, I think, but that's never stopped me.

While I agree that Xena and Gabrielle had sex on multiple occasions, I don't think it was a regular or consistent thing through their relationship for several reasons--not least because Xena was always more in love with Gabrielle than the reverse, and because Gabrielle was fairly emotionally manipulative anyway. I don't think they ever did it before Xena's first major resurrection--that is, the one when Xena's body is briefly hijacked by the Warrior Princess' OTHER blond obsession. And I also think that they stopped after the Gabdrag for a very long time. And I don't think Gabby ever intended to be sexually monogamous anyway.

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Originally posted by Taumpy

After having been properly chastised by Loki for forgetting about these two, I'm gonna have to mention Xena and Gabrielle. There's really no way they weren't involved. It actually truly perplexes me that there are still fans that don't accept this when they all but blatantly refer to each other as life partners, and the show openly refers to them as eternal soulmates that are a part of each other's lives in every incarnation. (yeah, I know. I roll my eyes at that too.) In fact, their "modern day incarnations" are married to each other.

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Seriously? There are still people who think Xena and Gabrielle weren't doing it?

By the end of the show, it was less subtext than text, I thought.

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Originally posted by Skald the Rhymer

While I agree that Xena and Gabrielle had sex on multiple occasions, I don't think it was a regular or consistent thing through their relationship

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Okay. All I was arguing was that they were not just good pals.

ETA:

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Originally posted by Skald the Rhymer

I don't think they ever did it before Xena's first major resurrection--that is, the one when Xena's body is briefly hijacked by the Warrior Princess' OTHER blond obsession. And I also think that they stopped after the Gabdrag for a very long time.

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I don't think they were involved until after Xena's first real death. (ie, The Quest) Right after the body switch is way too close to Perdicus' death. I'm not gonna argue that Gabby wasn't at all emotionally manipulative, but you are way too hard on her. As for her cooling off after the Gabdrag. Um, wouldn't you? :dubious:

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Originally posted by Orual

You do take delight in vexing me, Rhymer.

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So you're saying Redival WOULDN'T have tried to manipulate the Fox to gain power over him?

I always thought that Yogi and Ranger Smith had something going on.

I think the whole picnic basket thing was born of sexual frustration.

I recall a rumor that late in the run of the series Ranger Smooth and Boo Boo had been seen
leaving a motel outside of Yellowstone. Rumor continues that the Ranger and Yogi never spoke
again. A disturbing twist on the tale is that Boo Boo would only have been about 15 in bear
years at the time.

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Originally posted by Skald

While I agree that Xena and Gabrielle had sex on multiple occasions, I don't think it was a regular or consistent thing through their relationship for several reasons--not least because Xena was always more in love with Gabrielle than the reverse, and because Gabrielle was fairly emotionally manipulative anyway.

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Sounds like marriage to me.

In the anime Vision of Escaflowne there is so much effed up fucking going on in the open, so to speak, that some people allow themselves to be blinded by some of the even more effed up subtext.

There is this character, Dilandu, who is batshit insane. Dilandu is also in charge of an elite unit of pretty young men. Whom he disciplines in a rather sadosexual manner. And who are, to a man, devoted to him. Not only am I sure that Dilandu was using sex to control his unit, it was also a major factor for what stability he had. When they are killed, to a man, defending him - he goes batshit insaneR. In an effort to make Dilandu at least fake sanity long enough to go back to war, his higher ups give him a new unit, consisting of a single "man:" Jajuka, one of the beast-men that inhabit the world that the anime takes place in.

And yes, I am sure they were boning, too.

Dilandu, batshit insane version: http://webspace.webring.com/people/q...84/dilandu.gif

Dilandu, batshit insaneR version: http://webspace.webring.com/people/q...4/mrinsane.jpg

Jajuka: http://www.galeon.com/romancescaflowne/Todos/jajuka.jpg

Re: Dilandau - I'm impressed, Loki. Even my mind did not go right to sadomasochist gay orgy when I saw those scenes. And you're right, even if true that's hardly the most disturbing thing about his character. The big reveal about his character actually had me screaming aloud in horror and shock.

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Originally posted by Glazer

Sounds like marriage to me.

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<3 :madsci:

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Originally posted by Myrnalene

Even my mind did not go right to sadomasochist gay orgy when I saw those scenes. And you're right, even if true that's hardly the most disturbing thing about his character. The big reveal about his character actually had me screaming aloud in horror and shock.

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No indeed. Although I'm pretty sure that every episode of that show ended with me screaming in horror.

Oh Escaflowne, how completely demented it is. <3

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Originally posted by Skald the Rhymer

So you're saying Redival WOULDN'T have tried to manipulate the Fox to gain power over him?

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Redival's tastes ran to young and pretty, I don't think she'd view a homely old slave as a viable bed-partner. I don't think she was smart enough to use sex as manipulation, anyways.

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Originally posted by Myrnalene

Trowa / Quatre - Gundam Wing.

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Every male character in this series slept with at least one other male character. With the exception of Wu Fei, who was a cold stone butch and screwed no one. I'll get you someday, Wu Fei! :fist:

Shared body or no, Tyler Durden and the narrator/Ed Norton's character were totally getting it on.

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Originally posted by RabbitMage

Every male character in this series slept with at least one other male character. With the exception of Wu Fei, who was a cold stone butch and screwed no one. I'll get you someday, Wu Fei! :fist:

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/hijacks own thread

Wu Fei was the prettiest!

http://akureimegami.tripod.com/siteb...wufeifront.jpg

why are my DVDs in Alabama :fail:

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Originally posted by Taumpy

Okay. All I was arguing was that they were not just good pals.

ETA:


I don't think they were involved until after Xena's first real death. (ie, The Quest) Right after the body switch is way too close to Perdicus' death.

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You're right; I was misremembering the sequence of episodes. Haven't seen 'em in years. Must check to see if they're on DVD.

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I'm not gonna argue that Gabby wasn't at all emotionally manipulative, but you are way too hard on her. As for her cooling off after the Gabdrag. Um, wouldn't you? :dubious:

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Perhaps, though Gabby's reasons may have been different than yours and mine would have been.

House and Cuddy.

Sally Rogers and Mel. Why not? Or Sally and Alan Brady.


Aunt Bea and Floyd, before his drinking got too bad.

Gomer and Goober--Southern kissin' cousins indeed!

Potsie and Malph-Ralph

Magnum liked to watch those Dobermans go at it....


Tutie and Natalie from Facts of Life.

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Originally posted by eleanorigby

House and Cuddy.

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Well, okay, but that wasn't secret, they had been seeing each other years before.

Okay, well, to contribute, Frodo and Sam.

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Originally posted by eleanorigby

Tutie and Natalie from Facts of Life.

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Huh. And I would've thought Jo and Blair.

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Originally posted by Taumpy

Huh. And I would've thought Jo and Blair.

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I'm not sure that's true. It was, however, quite obvious that Blaire was deeply, madly, and hopelessly in love with Jo; I'm just not sure that Jo reciprocated.

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Originally posted by Exy

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Okay, well, to contribute, Frodo and Sam.

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No, no. The thread title is Characters who were secretly boning each other. So Gimli and Legolas don't count either, or Merry and Pippin.

Cheers - Norm and Cliff


Taxi - Louis and Latka


Murphy Brown - Miles and Frank AND Corkey and Murphy


True.

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Originally posted by Skald the Rhymer

I'm not sure that's true. It was, however, quite obvious that Blaire was deeply, madly, and hopelessly in love with Jo; I'm just not sure that Jo reciprocated.

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But the deep dark secret is Natalie and Mrs Garrett. Swear on my mother's grave!


Re House and Cuddy--I meant that was how he got that job in the first place. ;)

Deeana Troi and everybody she "counselled".

Rick Blaine and Signor Ferrari.

Hmm, I wonder if there's Murphy Brown slashfic floating around . . .

Batman and Robin


Greg Brady and Marcia

but it was Peter and Alice that was so surprising!

I think Barbarino cut class to visit Mrs. Kotter a few times.

You know Mama Carlson cornered Andy Travis at least once.

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Originally posted by Laughing Lagomorph

I think Barbarino cut class to visit Mrs. Kotter a few times.

You know Mama Carlson cornered Andy Travis at least once.

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Man, I think those are both true actually. Mrs. Kotter was clearly not satisfied with Mr. Kotter, her life kind of sucked, etc.

As to Mama Carlson, she traded favors with Andy without question. She clearly used him at least as an escort and I am fairly sure she went further.