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Nah. Never, in fact. Not even a dick pic. I feel very unappreciated by my telephone contacts. I'm fairly sure at least one women would call the police on me were I to send one. Probably more than one.
TNP is pretty sure he or she had a "breakthrough" case of CV-19, or TNP would be pretty stoked to have had a "breakthrough" case, because of, you know, extra immune powers and stuff.
Yep, I had very severe "flu" symptoms just before the hysteria kicked off. It didn't feel like a normal flu.
TNP has a favourite type of cloud.
I can’t really say I have a preference.
TNP likes hot peppers on pizza.
I wouldn't object to them, but I've also never asked for them. I prefer pepperoni, or sausage, or both, or pepperoni and pineapple.
TNP hates that last combination.
Negative, Col. I think it's pretty good!
TNP approves of the return of Trojan Man!
Definitely, hope he hangs around.
TNP is grateful for every surprise that’s actually pleasant.
Absolutely, those seem to be becoming exceedingly rare in recent times.
TNP makes a mean soup.
Sure, I could. But that would cut down on my chili-making time (lots of red meat, insane amounts of red peppers, green peppers, onions, garlic). Actually, more of a stew, using all of the above, adding potatoes, corn, sounds better. But opening a can of corned beef hash sounds even easier, and it's edible!
TNP has multiple nests of various creatures about his or her domicile/vehicle/whatever.
Just one that I know of, a bird nest under the eaves of our garage, currently unoccupied but often in use in the spring. There's also a small rabbit which we often see in our backyard, nibbling on the clover, so I suspect his or her nest is somewhere nearby.
TNP ought to mow today.
Sure. But I don't think the kind of "mowing the grass" I'm talking about is what you mean.
TNP has recently been guilty of "simping" for a couple of gals or guys: putting in a little extra muscle to aid them in their tasks at work, for example.
I helped some old people pack away tables and chairs. They thought I was trying to rob them or something. *sigh* no good deed goes unpunished.
TNP has seen a lizard IRL in the last 217 hours.
No, jeez, it's been years since I've seen a lizard IRL.
TNP has touched at least three snakes in his or her life and not been bitten.
Sure. I mean, not like I "touched" them in an inappropriate manner or anything, but as kids it was fun to see garter snakes all the time. I don't think the snakes much appreciated the boy-handling, but I don't think any were physically harmed, at least by anyone I knew.
TNP has regularly gone into "rattlesnake country" and never took any particular precautions except to be cautious of where you put your hands scrambling up some scree or bushwhacking. Bonus points if TNP had no lewd thoughts on seeing the term "bushwhacking."
Not rattlesnake country specifically, but the local equivalent, sure. I recently almost stood on a red bellied black sunning itself in a strange spot. Luckily they're not terribly aggressive and it just shimmied away from me slightly - a friendly warning that I was too close. Re: bushwhacking, I'm still not sure I know what it means (just that REM and Pearl Jam used the phrase in songs to refer to Dubya and/or his dad) .
TNP has bats (��) near where they live.
Totally. There's a great old wooden sidewalk a few miles from here supported by an elaborate system of trusses. If you walk over it at night, you can witness the bats scurrying about eating bugs or people or whatever they do.
TNP is slightly suspicious of women friends who self-segregate in order to perform tasks. What are they so secretive about? What are they plotting? Yes, one understands they're friends, but it's like a mini coven or something.
I don't think I've ever noticed that, so no.
TNP can look out the window and see sunshine and puffy clouds right now.
Yes. As David Lynch's daily weather report today from his Frank Lloyd Wright house in L.A. predicted, it holds true for me further north. To use DL's favorite phrase, "All blue skies and golden sunshine," but, yes, there are some lovely cumulus clouds as well.
TNP would be royally pissed off if he or she bought a "baguette" from a grocery store, only to get home and find one must finish cooking that par-cooked bastard on one's own. Fuckers. Only Huns and the Finns despise baguettes! Tarnish everybody with the same damned brush. Bunch of fools.
Damn straight. Whoever heard of having to further bake a baguette bought from a store?
TNP is about due for a haircut.
Shaved it all off yesterday. So not really.
TNP likes Forged in Fire.
Yeah, great show.
TNP would never consider bladesmithing at home.
Probably not, no.
TNP has at least three swords in the home.
Nope. No swords.
TNP has recently had a RL "conversation" with somebody where you literally could not understand the words out their mouths.
*sigh* almost weekly.
TNP is looking forward to winter.
Not really. I'd like to enjoy this beautiful autumn first.
TNP will be buying dark apple cider as soon as it's available.
Suppose so. Might toss in the occasional pint of cider in at the bar. Don't know if it will be dark or not, just depends on what they have on tap.
TNP should probably start using the phrase "take off, hoser" IRL more often.
That's a bit too 1981 for me, so no, I don't think so.
TNP can think of three other great (and non-novelty) songs from 1981.
Our Lips Are Sealed (The Go-Go's)
Girls on Film (Duran Duran... the film clip was very educational...)
Centerfold (J. Geils band)
TNP has been awestruck by the sky recently.
Yes, we've had some gorgeous blue skies with big puffy clouds during the day, and some spectacular orange-red sunsets, here in recent weeks.
TNP knows the names of at least five kinds of clouds by heart.
Cirrus
Stratus
Cumulus
Nimbus
Mammatus
TNP has outdone themselves cooking a dish recently.
No, I can't do much more than boil water, make toast or heat the contents of a can.
Huh - I'd heard of all of those clouds except the last one! Here's more: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mammatus_cloud
TNP has seen that Wiki article before.
Nope. Never heard of a mammatus cloud neither: sounds like something Howard Hughes would have liked to put in his only good picture.
TNP can explain why it is that he or she thinks he or she can gauge the intelligence of a person by observing their face and movements, or, TNP disagrees with the premiss.
Mammatus clouds rule! Spread the word!
You can gauge intelligence by facial expressions/body language up to a point. But it's always dangerous to assume you understand too much... it leads to joining dots that aren't really there.
TNP's smoke alarms are up-to-date.
Yes, they are. And our CO detector.
TNP has given a dog a treat in the past three days.
Sure. I allow them to live. No, I've seen some that are OK in the past few days, and was friendly to them.
TNP agrees with the statement that "Australia is nuts about smelly self rimmers. Most people look at you like you've got steaming turds hanging out your mouth or just get angry if you say anything bad about dogs." (from some reddit post). Not that there's anything wrong with that!
I have no reason to doubt that, even if I don't entirely understand it.
TNP has read a crime novel in the past month.
Nope. Crime novels don't really interest me. I've been acquiring interesting books but never seem to get around to reading them.
TNP has had a good belly laugh recently.
Yes. Remembering the comedian Norm Macdonald, who just died, a friend sent me this clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uarJj-K4XH4
TNP had seen that clip before.
No I hadn't. Sad news though. 2021 + comedians + cancer = no good.
TNP has a neighbour they wish would just vanish off the face of the earth.
You are correct, sir! If I thought I could get away with it, I'd do the "vanishing" with my own two hands and a stout piece of metal pipe.
TNP is often irritated by slow turds at work who are as useful as a dug up body.
I was once, in a former job, but not now, fortunately.
TNP needs a new business card.
I think my sparkling personality suffices, actually.
TNP enjoys listening to Dave Brubeck.
You know. I don't want to be a downer, but although Brubeck's harmonizations are interesting, for example, in "Georgia/Mind," I don't enjoy his execution at the keyboard. A child could play that, after the concept was figured out.
TNP is probably too rapidly excited by suggestions, sounds, shapes, coming from his or her preferred gender. And TNP wouldn't have it any other way.
Yes, definitely - there's something about a smart, beautiful woman that gets my attention every time.
TNP has played Scrabble in the past month, and won.
No. I'm not actually very good at Scrabble, although it's fun. Crosswords, though! Those gnarly Friday and Saturday NYT ones, but haven't done those in ages either.
[I was a little harsh on Bru, and he gets full points for having assembled a fantastic band, Paul Desmond on alto, Joe Morello on drums. I might somebody come back to his recordings to poach some ideas, who knows!]
TNP got off to a rough start over the weekend and is kind of in a vaguely curmudgeonly mood.
Yeah, about right.
TNP has had strange dreams lately.
Yes, just last night I dreamt I was in a restaurant with my wife and some other person whom I couldn't quite see, but I knew it was a male friend. The restaurant was indescribably weird and we never got our food. There was a time in the dream when I thought I might even be a restaurant critic, but then I somehow knew I wasn't. Very odd.
TNP, having tried Scrabble, is now willing to try Bananagrams, which is sort of a more free-flowing form of the game (and which my family likes a lot): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bananagrams
No.
TNP has ever had two vaccines at the same time, one for each arm. For example, flu and pneumonia.
Not that I know of.
TNP will be leaving town this weekend.
I wish.
TNP has enjoyed soup recently.
Not as recently as I would like. I love soup.
TNP likes eggs in just about every form.
Agreed. Scrambled or fried especially, with some hot buttered toast with jam, please, and bacon or sausage, and some OJ... yum!
TNP's mouth is now watering.
Yeah, I guess, but not for any savory reasons.
TNP would be extremely irritated if one's HOA, which disallows all dogs except service animals, refuses to enforce their mandate. And would not be above taking matters into his or her own hands.
Extremely irritated, yes. Taking matters into my own hands, probably not (depending on exactly what you mean by that).
TNP needs a new toothbrush.
Not at the moment. I have a few serviceable heads for the Oral-B electric, and plenty of fresh regular ones.
TNP has a favorite toothpaste, and is willing to pay a premium for it.
No, not really. As long as the bristles are soft but not too soft, I'm happy.
TNP flosses daily.
Yeah, every night.
TNP has been to Barbados.
The Charlie Parker tune? Yeah, I been "there"! ;D
TNP is done with travelling except by overland transportation, and the occasional direct plane flight.
Until the COVID picture is looking a lot better, yes.
TNP has been in NYC in the past month.
Nope. Probably won't go back in a while: I'm afraid I'd be disappointed again at how much things have changed.
TNP has ever used "transition" lenses on prescription eyeglasses or (inclusive/"wedge") thinks they're pretty neat.
Yeah, before my LASIK they were what I always wore.
TNP thinks banana splits could make it as a breakfast food.
A bit too sweet, dense and sugar-laden for my tastes at that time of day (and that's saying something!), but I guess so.
TNP definitely has a sweet tooth.
About once a year or so. Probably about the time those little rats come knocking looking for their "treats." I'm pretty sure they're parents have warned them about my place (and there's a limit on children at my condo community), and the "Don't Knock Or Ring Ever" sign duck-taped to the door probably reinforces that.
TNP has a solution to this minor irritation: so, this woman still has my Flexfit ballcap that fits my 7 ¾ melon, and while I want it back, I don't want to converse with her even via text. Yes, I bought another one, but it wasn't the same hat, and I don't feel like buying yet another stupid ballcap, which I liked very much. A simple sample solution would be a text saying "Don't reply, please, just leave my hat behind my bar, where you seem to be skulking around." Or has another solution. And will say it.
Yeah, that would work, or maybe if you have a mutual friend, you could just ask her to leave it with that person?
TNP needs to mow the lawn at least once more before autumn really kicks in.
Nah, that sounds like crazy talk! Isn't it going to freeze and get all funky over the winter anyway?
[Yeah, more or less: the bartenders all know me and her, and they do little favors like that all the time for regulars].
TNP has recently made him or herself rather ill by eating way too much Halloween candy. Yeah. "Fun Size," like I'm so sure people aren't going to eat an entire bag in one sitting!
I have in the past, but not this year... yet!
TNP has a favorite Halloween candy and has already stocked up on it, or will be soon.
No, not really. Maybe Butterfingers or Reesies Pieces or whatever they're called. Of course, the king of all candies is Finnish Salmiakki/Turkinpippuri (salted [the salt is ammonium chloride]) licorice hard candies. The best and strongest are made by the Finnish company Fazer, but one isn't supposed to eat too much ammonium chloride in one sitting for various health reasons. Children would not like them in their Halloween bags, pretty sure!
TNP has recently been kicking all kinds of ass at a various game/sport, and will provide details if so.
Well... I'm doing pretty well on my latest round of Tetris, I suppose. Up over 300 or so, I think. Love that game!
TNP has played Tetris in the past month.
No, I have not! Oh, no! You've rekindled the tetris beast! Oh, man, what a terrific game!
TNP has ever played the arcade full-sized format of Tetris. OR (TNP can choose), TNP has ever experienced true "Tetris effect" on the brain (also applicable to chess and such).
Never heard of that before!: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tetris_effect. Yes, I guess I have, a little now and then. I've also read that Tetris has been found to be helpful to some soldiers suffering from PTSD, oddly enough.
TNP knows a U.S. Army veteran well.
Yeah. Worked alongside more Army vets than I can count, as well as the other branches of the armed services, but as far as knowing well, I guess it was my first "real" band, the drummer was Army all the way. Not a lifer, and didn't see combat nor was in for very long, but that definitely was a formative experience for him: in his words, it was "his college." Great guy and a brilliant drummer as well, especially for being so young (early twenties), who understood dynamics of sound and balance. Not in touch with that whole crew anymore, but rock solid dude.
TNP, if he or she discovered that a former "special" acquaintance was suddenly working behind the bar during the times and days one has been habitually coming in after work for years, would not dream of changing his or her routine because of any potential unpleasantness.
Probably not. "To thyself be true." I'd rather be myself than try to keep up appearances and lie to someone I once cared about.
TNP has had a brandy alexander in the past month.
No, haven’t had any brandy in the house in a while, should get some.
TNP has had a Vesper recently.
No, but that's not a bad idea.
TNP has already seen the latest 007 movie.
Negative, Colonel. I didn't even know there was one.
TNP has made a grown woman cry, to his or her best knowledge, by his or her actions but not by neglicence.
I don't think so. My mom would puddle up a little now and then, when I was in my teens, but that just a manipulation technique.
For more on the Bond movie: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_Time_to_Die
TNP will be sorry to see Daniel Craig leave the role.
Not particularly. In the one hand, I don't care. On the other hand, he "got with" my gal Rachel Wesiz. Meh. Don't care. Eff that dude. I hope he dies.
TNP has ever leaned on a car horn for over ten seconds in a parking lot to alert an incompetent who tried to back up in the midst of normal traffic flow of 5 mph. Well beyond, that is, the simple "toot toot" that was probably required, by an order of magnitude.
Just once or twice. It's rarely been necessary.
TNP has walked in a well-forested park in the past week.
No.
TNP is very well accustomed to frequently being soaking wet, from head to toe. While wearing clothes.
No, it's been years.
TNP prefers a hot shower to a cold one, regardless of the season.
Yes. I know it's manly and all to take a cold shower. But I ain't no damned Steve McQueen, or whatever. If "bracing" or "invigorating" cold water touches more than a small numerical value of the surface integral of my skin in toto, I'll probably be inclined to kick somebody's ass.
TNP actually thinks Buffalo has a good shot at reaching the Superbowl this year, despite last week's unfortunate episode against fricking Jackonsville.
No opinion, but sure, why not?
TNP is already considering how much to bet on the Super Bowl.
No. I only bet on games where I control the outcome, like playing pool.
TNP, if he or she is a gambler, is just fine with breaking even in the end. Or would be.
I guess so, but I'd sure like to win!
TNP has won at least US$20 on a bet in the past week.
No. Five bucks or so on a rack or a game of dice is about my limit: if one bets all the time, it can add up, so twenty a frame is going to end up more than I can afford when the day is done,
TNP really enjoys "speaking" through a megaphone/bullhorn and has done so in recent memory.
It's been years, but yeah, it was kind of fun.
TNP owns a small silvery whistle.
Yes. I call it an A=440 Hz tuning fork and it lives in a jacket pocket. Song comes on the jukebox, you want to know what key they're doing it in? Reference note and some common sense.
TNP: Led Zeppelin or AC/DC...............most often heard at the local bar/whatever.
Led Zeppelin, but not by a huge margin. Neither is really my favorite group.
TNP is in the mood for BBQ chicken tonight.
Yeah, kind of. Some chooch was watching the 49ers/Jacksonville game while I was trying to catch the Bills/Colts game on another TV (which was a pathetic game, but I'm a masochist so I watched right up until the final second............meh..........WTF BFLO? Maybe a wild card slot........not so good), and now I've got Frank's Red Hot smell in recent memory. Dude, who the hell watches the 49ers? Not as bad as being a Patriots "fan," but still, whatever. You know they're going to clean up, as they did. Packers lost by a small margin, but that was a good game. Seagulls also....meh.....as Ra Teasha at work said on our way out the door today, "don't even say it!"
TNP thinks he or she would have done due diligence by calling the county sheriff's non-emergency number upon taking down a stop sign immediately, and waiting on hold for 0.5 hours, while waiting for a tow from AAA, and, if so, is like "Hey, come at me, bro! Gimme a citation, don't give a fuck! Knock on my door, chucklefuck! Dude, it already cost me plenty, so pile it on, don't care!"
"Upon taking down a stop sign"? Like, by hitting it with my car? Yes, definitely.
TNP has read a historical novel in the past month.
No, sorry to say. That does sound like good fun, but I haven't been reading anything much except music recording magazines, sheet music, and the Wall Street Journal.
[Yes, "take down" as in run it the eff over at about 50 mph...hey, man, AAA wouldn't even take the call to tow me out of the mud until I made contact with the sheriff....but after being on hold for half an hour with the non-emergency county sheriff's number, I was like...I'm sure they'll make contact with me, probably a citation. Maybe nothing. Who knows. They have a record of my call, as does AAA, so given that there was an actual literal riot in the city that evening, I think they had their hands full. Whatevs: I tried my best, so, I don't know what else is reasonable to expect of me. I'm no scofflaw, but AFAIC, it's just ancient history at this point. I don't even know what the municipal revised statues say about my liability, but I do have collision insurance and all that, so...we'll see.]
TNP is just plain getting too old for this shit!
Like the old cop in just about every crime comedy ever made, yes, I certainly am.
TNP has seen a Lethal Weapon movie in the past week.
No, it's been a few years since I saw those for the first time.
TNP's athletic ability is not much more advanced than tossing a piece of paper into a wastebasket with great aplomb and so-so accuracy.
A little better than that, I suppose. I can play basketball, soccer and baseball with about average skill for my age, but I can swim like a fish.
TNP would like to go swimming this week.
No sir. See, the thing is, it's pretty damp outside already, and likely to remain so for the indefinite future, and I'm extremely used to being soaked in water head-to-toe, from sweat, rain, or both, five days a week. No thank you! That is quite enough for me.
TNP knows somebody really well who super enjoys traveling by train as a mode of transportation, and can completely understand the appeal.
Yes, my Uncle Frank has been a train buff from 'way back. He'd probably go on a train ride every week if he had the chance.
TNP has been on a train in the past month.
No, not even a commuter/urban train/tram. They are good, though. Even freight trains: pass by a big junction ten times a week out by the ports. You can smell the diesel, son! For real.
TNP ever caught the "model RR scene" bug or knew someone who had.
I did, for a couple of years when I was a kid, and my aforementioned Uncle Frank had a big train layout in his basement that I really liked.
TNP read something in The New York Times today.
No. I did just now pick up a print edition of the WSJ weekend edition. Yes, I know where the money is going, and I don't support it, but it gives me something with which to hide my rage boner at a bunch of stuff. Besides, the numbers don't lie. If I want accurate international news, I use French presses or sometimes British ones, if necessary. Even the Finns have a fairly robust if whimsical newscorp.
TNP has ever been in a situation where he or she doesn't really want to screw a particular broad, for non-physiological or psychological reasons, but almost feels obligated to. Mostly because he or she just doesn't want to get involved. Excuse my language.
.
No, I confess that I have never, in my entire life, been in that situation. But it sure sounds interesting!
TNP has seen the British comedy panel show Would I Lie to You?
Afraid not.
TNP would be absolutely incensed upon hearing that a coworker was terminated for appearing as a juror in a criminal trial, and would wish the most draconian punishment for an employer who who would have done this, up to and perhaps including monetary damages restored to this hapless pawn.
Damn straight. No one should lose their job for fulfilling their civic duty. (If this really happened, I suggest you or the coworker let the judge know right away).
TNP owns at least six JFK half-dollars.
No. I haven't had any of those cross my palms in a few decades or so. Certainly didn't save any, in their physical form.
TNP is agnostic on the idea that "cash is king" for tipping servers, but is still somewhat OK with using plastic for just about everything except, maybe, coin-op pool tables.
Yeah, pretty much. Even pre-Covid I was using plastic for just about everything.
TNP has walked around on a battleship.
Possibly. They have a "fleet week" or used to around here when I was a kid, and some of the junior officers seemed pretty stoked to be showing the gewgaws and doodads to kids on a weekend.
TNP is or would be pretty stoked to be hitched up to a K-5 school teacher of breeding age.
If I weren't married, and if she were smart and cute, definitely!
TNP had a serious crush on one of his or her teachers while in elementary school.
Absolutely not.
TNP keeps a bunch of pictures/photographs around or knows somebody who does.
I definitely do. I have... lemme see... five small framed pictures of my wife and sons within arm's reach at this very moment.
TNP's parents are both still alive.
Yeah. The eldest of my literal namesake is not in the tip-top of shape, but I hope he doesn't bring my eternally frazzled and stressed-out mother down with him. They're not even, neither of them, even in their seventies yet.
TNP has recently been extremely pissed off at a woman of no blood relation to him or her.
Not too recently, no, but there have certainly been times in the past (especially with one of my two older sisters).
TNP has read Frank Herbert's Dune in the past year.
Nah, not since I was a teenager.
TNP can’t imagine going to the movies in the near future.
Negative. I'd do it any time, but I don't see what there is out there. For example, I learned here that there's some James Bond movie out...meh,..hard pass for me. And the other day I heard there's some new Spider Man picture out. Also, meh. Excuse my language, but it's like screwing some broad, you know: I don't need to see that shit in a theater. I already been to see movies.
TNP thinks a date to see a picture is just fine when one is accustomed to one another's company and can really get down in the back rows, but is not so good for a first date.
Depends on the movie and the other person, but I think it's OK for a first date generally.
TNP has had Ethiopian food in the past month.
Negative, Colonel. Not for a long time. I think the most recent time was when a young coworker offered to share some of the lunch his mother packed for him. Good stuff, although very different than what you find in restaurants.
TNP has had a boil/furuncle and found it to be a pain...in the ass...or wherever.
Yes, a small one, a long time ago. Not pleasant, but not the end of the world, either.
TNP went to the library today.
Haven't left the house since Saturday except to get groceries across the street.....and a bottle of Teeling Single Grain Irish. The only possible road to the main road has been covered in ice and has been impassible without studded tires AFAIC, given the grade of the hill, and the main road itself has been on "active snow zone" alert, meaning only vehicles with traction devices are legally allowed to drive on it. With a very few short exceptions in the past few days, it's not been possible to navigate the roads.
TNP is getting religious, or already is, about changing automobile engine oil every 5000 miles, ideally with full synthetic.
I've always been pretty good about that, so no, not "getting religious" about it.
TNP has seen a muddy dog today.
I actually had one run up to me today. Very happy pupper.
TNP has recently had an erotic dream about Ted Danson.
Yeesh. Thank God, no. I never have and I hope I never will.
TNP thinks Ted Danson did the best acting of his career on the miniseries Fargo.
Nah. Not that I've seen *Fargo*, but how can one top *Becker*? Exactly! Can't be done!
TNP will finish this list of Irish whiskeys starting with Green Spot (actually a very interesting whiskey, which escapes the triple distilled curse of the bland Irishes), Redbreast 12, ............
...Dublin Gold? Limerick Black Reserve? Dunno. Not an Irish whiskey guy.
TNP has big plans for the weekend.
Nope. Working a sixth day tomorrow, probably hang out at "the bar" for a bit afterwards (grab a bite to eat, a few ciders, maybe a game of pool or two). Then start the week as usual on zero dark thirty Sunday morning, which will be a slight challenge if they still have the access road to St. John's Bridge closed for the ride in and out to the industrial region (maybe they'll finally fix some of those potholes! it's fucking hell on the alignment, major route for freight trailers on the move).
TNP knows at least two people who are all-in for Green Bay this NFL season.
I probably do but don't know it. I don't talk football with many people.
TNP has actually seen the Packers play at home.
No. Not only that, but I have never seen an NFL game live at any time, ever. Only TV/radio/print.
TNP can name a genre (or sub-genre, maybe) of music that he or she has recently "discovered." And if true, will do name it!
Sort of. This Lebanese singer is featured in the movie Only Lovers Left Alive, and I'd never heard of her before, or this kind of Arabic love song. I really like it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDepIDGKC2U
TNP likes vampire movies.
Yeah, I go me some vampire movies. No doubt. Some better than others, of course, but it's a deep corpus.
TNP is one chill mofo on the highways, not be forgetting turn signals, nor any camping out in the passing lane: right speed, at the right time, and no fooling around.
Yes, I'm a safe driver, all in all. Been years (knock wood) since I was in an accident.
TNP will be binging on a TV show this weekend.
No. <checks in daily log> However, I've heard yesterday good things about this show on NetFlix called, apparently, Archive 84. Shan't binge it, though: too much other stuff to watch, plus eye fatigue from looking at stuff most days.
TNP has lost his or her patience with younger "people" and the services that specialize in catering to them. And will explain.
No, I'm not quite to that stage of Old Farthood yet. Some young people annoy me, true, but then, so do some old people and some middle-aged people.
Hadn't heard of that show before - I think you may have the title slightly wrong: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Archive_81
TNP has read about Woodrow Wilson in the past month.
No, I have not, but I would like to. I've heard about Wilson! (!) (ty for the emendation about the TV show....looking at ... oh.....when writing in longhand, the numeral "1" looks quite a bit like the numeral "4"....anyway, it was just something I jotted down from somebody I was chatting with yesterday.)
Recommendations W_Wilson?
TNP thinks writing "intelligenti pauca, sic semper porcis" would be pretty fly to write on the "tip" line of a restaurant bill to someone whom one really despised.
Google Translate gave me "One who understands a few things, so always the pigs," which might not be quite what you meant. I have to admit I've never written anything in Latin in lieu of giving a tip; might have to try that sometime.
I highly recommend this one-volume Wilson bio, which is generally admiring while also conceding his many flaws and mistakes (especially on racial issues, for mishandling the League of Nations, and for not resigning when he was clearly disabled and not up to the job): https://www.amazon.com/Woodrow-Wilso...53263844&psc=1
TNP thinks I should cut Wilson some slack, Jack.
Probably. There is a very nice avenue in Paris, FR named after him. So Wilson's got that going for him. I still blame Wilson in part for his "nativist" role in the temperance movement, but I only know the broad strokes of his political life and the cultural climate at the time.
[Um, I don't know about Google Translate, but generally "intelligenti pauca" is understood as "small [things] to the wise," (I think Stendhal was the one to come up with that one) and "porcis" is meant to be the dative plural of "pig." No, it turned out I didn't owe her anything, or more likely she was like "meh, a few beers, forget about it, not worth the effort," but what I would have put on the tip line is just the simpler "pauca porcis," which I would just translate as "small [things] to pigs." Very crass and impolite, however.]
TNP thinks there's probably a good age to stop chasing poontang 24-7, but recognizes that it is simply impossible.
Pretty much. When a heterosexual man loses interest in beautiful women, it's definitely not a good sign.
TNP loves hearing Nina Simone singing "Take Care of Business": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwKrTBcURU8
I do now! Don't remember ever having heard that one before.
TNP agrees that the "rules of engagement" concerning women at the workplace include that one should not approach one's prey with the sole intention of making conversation with her. However, any and all other forms of verbal contact, professional or not, are allowed and encouraged. This is particularly important when handling younger women who may be a bit timid or less socially adept, when compared to older women, as well as compared to the would-be Nimrod himself, whose confidence, aplomb, and experience are nonpareil.
To the extent I understood all that, yes, I agree (although "prey" isn't quite how I see them).
TNP saw two hawks, a woodpecker and a bright red cardinal today, as I did.
Hell no. I wish I did. Pretty sure I saw a fairly impressive hawk of some kind out of the clear blue of the Western skies this afternoon, though. Pretty cool.
TNP thinks it would be hilarious to say over a two-way radio in response to a request for assistance (when one is literally occupied with other tasks): "Yeah, Jerry will handle it, he's right there." Knowing full well that this entity, although fully capable of performing this task, would likely refuse or pretend to not hear. And TNP actually does or would do this kind of forced delegation/public shaming to similar sacks of dirt.
If it was funny enough at the time, of course.
TNP has had people paged at airports using funny names or titles.
Sure. Not me, but that used to be favorite of the "funny uncle" along with pretending to "walk" up the escalators in the wrong direction. Yes, I do remember the phones with which one could command an operator to do one's bidding.
TNP is about this far from breaking a foot off up in the ass of a scumbag coworker, and the recipient damned well knows it.
Fortunately not.
TNP would almost certainly have succumbed to Lisztomania, back in the day:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDEem_aEttE
And see: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lisztomania
No sir. Not really my guy, although I appreciate and reward some of his florurishes by playing his stuff. Comme il faut.
TNP thinks hamburgers are the cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast.
Some nutritious dinners, yes, but not for breakfast for me, ever, thanks. If I have breakfast at all (usually I just drink a little orange juice), I'll have scrambled eggs, or an omelet, or pancakes, or waffles, with a generous side of either sausage or bacon, please.
TNP could go for some of that right about now.
Yes. I never cook or eat breakfast at home, but I'll sometimes order two eggs, over hard, wheat toast, potatoes, bacon, and sometimes ask for hot sauce at a local dive, usually after work in the mid-morning/early afternoon. Along with the usual beers and Black Bushes or Johnny Blacks. It's wholesome fare, and, depending on who's in the kitchen or at the bar, they'll sometimes really load you up on the bacon, beyond any good reason.
Yeah, I could eat something like that most any time. Including now.
TNP finds that the best times to eat and drink at a bar are prior to eleven AM or so...no college kids lurking around, usually quiet, and mostly people getting off work or inveterate gamblers.
No, when it comes to bars, I'm strictly an after-dark kinda guy.
TNP is expecting at least 6 inches of snow to fall on his or her locality in the next 24 hours.
No, thank god, we’ve had a ton already.
TNP is noticing the days getting longer, and appreciates some hope of spring.
No and yes, respectively.
TNP could go for a grilled cheese sandwich right about now.
Probably. I'd go for a quarter pound of Roquefort and some decent crackers, though, if we're talking cheeses and cooked grains. I like the "toasted cheese sandwiches" very well indeed, but they remind me of Norma Bates.
TNP: no tomato soup, ever! Nor any wire hangers, ever, for that matter.
No, I like tomato soup a lot, and had some just last night, as it happens. Tomato, chicken noodle, clam chowder (New England style, of course) and lobster bisque are my all-time favorite soups. And yes, I use wire hangers sometimes. Don't you judge me!
TNP has read some Jane Austen in the past twelve months.
Yeah, probably. She's a good old gal IMHO.
TNP has never run into any problems referring to friendly acquaintances as "my gals," at work or perhaps elsewhere: nobody's taken offense, IOW.
I haven't said it, so no, no problems.
TNP has exchanged business cards with someone in the past week.
Leaving aside that I have been working from home for almost two years, I haven’t given out a lot of business cards in the past decade.
TNP figures they have enough business cards and business suits to get them through the rest of their life.
Could be. Just possibly.
TNP has read something about Winston Churchill recently.
No.
TNP knows a woman who is a cheesemonger.
No, I must confess, with regret, that I know not a single cheesemonger of any gender identity whatsoever.
TNP has seen and enjoyed the Cheese Shop sketch before: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hz1JWzyvv8A
Of course! Who hasn't! Good stuff right there.
TNP considers it a pretty good compliment when a woman says she thinks one is good with one's hands and mouth. Interpret how you will.
Yes, I wouldn't mind it in the least if a woman (especially a pretty one) said that to me.
TNP doubts that that cheese shop is actually the finest in the district, no matter how clean it is.
Not at all. I think the cheeses are not to my liking at that shop.
TNP knows a gal who likes to get down but cannot really hold her liquor. IOW, pretty good, but not good enough to hang nor even do a Cosby with, assuming TNP has adequate moral judgment and exercises it.
No, none of the women I know well are bad drunks. Or drunks at all, for that matter....
TNP would rather have a decent beer than a great wine, most times.
No. I don't often drink good wine, like a big red, but when I do, I find it more pleasurable than sucking down some suds. That said, I only drink cheap beer, the occasional decent cider, and good whiskies (mid-tier Irish and Scotches and above [Teeling Small Batch, Black Bush, or Johnnie Black could be baselines for the minimum amount of flavor I desire in whiskies, although none of those approach the better stuff]). "Decent" beer is kind of boring to me by now: I've had plenty of it in the past and I don't see the point, really.
TNP finds a crisp, relatively neutral (not overly fruity, i.e.) draft cider to be sometimes a lot more refreshing than any beer.
No, the few experiences I've had with draft ciders haven't left me eager for more. A good, dark, nonalcoholic apple cider, though? Yes, please.
TNP has something bright orange within arm's reach.
Mmm...yes, my coffee mug is sort of a rust color....the Connemara Peated Single Malt is also rust color.....but, yes! If I stretched arms some of the housings of some power extenders are indeed blaze orange in color. I call that a win!
TNP has ever been unhappy about setting up a "date" in advance, as in, from Pulp Fiction, "it's been built up too long and now [she] definitely won't laugh." (or whatever). IOW, sort of a perfect storm.
Yes, I was often an awkward, clueless idiot while dating in my late teens.
TNP still wishes he or she had propositioned someone in particular before turning twenty.
Hell no. Those women from 'The Early Years' are walking disaster zones and had nothing in common with me or my future self. Much happier with the women I met as an adult, including the one I'm seeing now.
TNP says "phooey" to those who suggest one can't find a suitable partner at a bar.
Unless the bar is almost empty, yeah, you can probably find someone worthy of at least sharing a drink.
TNP has read a Sherlock Holmes story in the past month.
No. Haven't read much except TapeOp magazine, and several times Keats's terrific sonnet "On First Looking into Chapman's Homer" in an attempt to memorize it.
TNP thinks that clean sheets, lots of blankets, and a clean bathroom are about good enough to invite one's lady friend over....especially if one has exactly two hours until going to sleep and a bunch of other "lady friend preparations" to do for tomorrow. Especially if he or she has shared pictures of the state of one's abode via text so she knows the score.
That's probably 90% of it, yeah. Not having the place be too cluttered, and having refreshments you know she likes, would be for the best, too.
TNP is planning a trip for this summer already.
Nope. Ain't got no yen to travel these days, not at all.
TNP wouldn't be a bit surprised if, after sending a very sweet, non-accusatory break-up text to a gal, if a little bit of drama ensued, and likely some tears should one acquiesce to talking in person with the subject. But TNP wouldn't be happy about it!
Agreed on all points.
TNP had at least a little bit of chocolate today.
No, but I intend to. This gal wanted to come over and "talk" face to face so I set out a plate of Petits écoliers, a pitcher of water and a glass, a bottle of red wine and a clean glass, just to be hospitable. I'll eat some of those little schoolboys for sure.
TNP considers himself or herself to be somewhat adept at basic household plumbing, on the level of replacing a flush valve or the like.
If I had to, yeah, maybe. But I'd rather call a pro.
TNP has met an actual geisha.
No.
TNP likes no theater. (Meh, the 'h' is silent!)
What little I've seen, yes, but I'm sure a little bit goes a long way.
TNP has been in Japan.
Nope. No desire to go, neither. I am content to enjoy NoJapan in my travels.Spoiler (mouseover to read):
h
TNP is not that happy with the amount of tannins and the associated staining of the lips and teeth that comes with drinking, say, a Cabernet Sauvignon, but is damned if he or she will stop drinking the damned stuff!
Yeah, that and from hot tea, I agree.
TNP could do with a nice mug of hot tea right about now.
Not really. Am happy with my daily brew of instant coffee. Meh, add some whole milk and it's fine.
TNP has broken one or more of those glass "carafes" used to steep coffee in the "FR Press" style.
I have not. I never drink coffee at home, only in coffeeshops and in restaurants after meals.
TNP thinks that's an odd distinction to draw.
Nah, not really odd.
TNP would just about sh*t if he or she discovered, after a period of no signs of activity for about a year, that bedbugs seem to have returned. And would probably blame his or her lady friend, secretly, just because.
Well, I'd be looking for somebody to blame. That would totally suck.
TNP has driven through all or part of Kansas in the past year.
Nope. Never. Not once went that far south in the midwest in car/train.
TNP knows somebody well who is from Kansas City, MO, and TNP wouldn't mind visiting KC someday.
No and yes.
TNP has been called for jury duty since Jan. 1.
Nah, haven’t received a notice in years. Not eligible anyway.
TNP is having something Irish to drink today.
Yes, I think I may sip a drop or three of Bushmills after dinner.
TNP has actually visited Ireland.
No, I have not. Some of them make a good whiskey, though.
TNP has ever "broken up" with a woman four or more times only to eventually reconcile.
No, every time I've broken up with a woman, it's been for good.
TNP scratched a happy dog's belly today.
No. I've seen dogs, though. I saw one today.
TNP has ever picked up the phone and said, "Hello, you have two [or however many] minutes. Go!" Or is thinking about it. Or has thought about it.
Yet again, tempting, but no, I never have. Maybe someday. Hmm... I should think of a good time to try that.
TNP has been on a conference call with at least six people in the past month.
Hmmm, haven’t been on a true conference call since probably the beginning of the pandemic. Microsoft Teams or maybe Zoom for everything.
TNP still has a landline, mostly because it doesn’t cost any more than not having it.
Not at home, but at work, yes.
TNP needs more rare coins in his or her life.
Yeah. Preferably some gold doubloons from a pirate's chest.
TNP would grudgingly accept a short-term monogamous sexual relationship if one knew it had an expiration date. But would withold one's essence (emotions, genuine caring, &c) from the partner in such a situation.
If I weren't happily married, yeah, probably. Depending on the girl, it just might not be all that grudging, either (bonus points for the Dr. Strangelove reference, BTW).
Despite Dr. Strangelove being a brilliant and amazingly funny Cold War spoof, TNP thinks that 2001: A Space Odyssey is actually Kubrick's best picture.
Probably. It's really tough to say. I'd be inclined to be contrarian and say *Barry Lyndon* is Kubrick's best picture, even though the tale is slight and from a lesser literary source. But, not really a super fan of SK, although I know his movies. He kind of bothers me, for some reason, in the way that Godard does, and a few others.
TNP recently found out that at least one person in his or her life is/was a pretty hard-core alcoholic, and, if not, can say that having found out similar factoids about someone really explains a lot.
Yes, I learned in the early 1990s that someone I thought I knew pretty well had a well-concealed drinking problem. He seems to be doing much better now, fortunately.
TNP wants pizza tonight.
No, but I probably will "cook" a frozen pizza and finish off this Cabernet Sauvignon table wine anyway. You know, the Barefoot Cab. Sauvign. n. is not terrible for a table wine. It's remarkably dark and full of tooth-staining whatnots. Acceptable for swilling.
TNP will explain the allure of delivery pizza, as I know RET is going to.....about.....almost....now?
:: waits patiently for RET ::
Sorry, life got in the way. Anyway, what’s to explain? Hot cheese, tomato, etc, brought to your door, marking Friday night, along with your ice cold Vesper.
TNP thinks the Vesper is James Bond’s greatest accomplishment.
No, repeatedly saving the world for Queen and Country has to be acknowledged as James Bond’s greatest accomplishment. But I concede that, in some circles, the Vesper is not too far behind.
TNP has read Ian Fleming's 007 short story collection, For Your Eyes Only, and remembers that the title story (which has almost nothing in common with the later movie of the same name) takes place in Jamaica, London, Canada and northern Vermont.
Yes, and not really. Perhaps not my finest accomplishment in reading, but I went through all the published Bond works during a period of low engagement. I do not recall that specific constellation of places, but I'm not a super Bondianiste, nor do I have all that great a memory when it comes to certain things. The Jamaican connection comes up at least once, IIRC, but I don't recall the title of the work(s).
TNP thinks it's a very grave invasion of privacy for others to remark on one's birthday. And TNP is actually surprised that people older than the age of, say, eight, seem to relish that kind of thing.
No and no, respectively. I wish people a happy birthday all the time, if I know it's theirs, and although I don't expect anyone over the age of eight to obsess about their own birthday, a certain level of fuss is fine with me.
TNP prefers chocolate birthday cake to vanilla.
Sure, why not? I'd gladly trade that for a decent pour (or several!) of Irish, but if I had to eat the cake, I'd go with chocolate. Followed by a vigorous tooth-brushing.
TNP thinks the Beastie Boys were one of the most important groups of the 1990s in popular music. Or TNP knew that they were generally fairly competent as instrumental musicians.
I'd heard that, but you couldn't prove it by me. I'm not a fan.
TNP was really into folk music, back in the day.
Not exactly. But I liked what people like Jimmy Page did on acoustic guitars, including the 12-string. Quick joke: how long does it take to tune a 12-string guitar? Nobody knows.
TNP is going to one of these days start practicing a bit harder on some instrument and such. Alternatively, TNP has recently been humbled by attempting to play an instrument. Yes, voice counts as an instrument.
Yes, I took several years of piano lessons as a kid and never got particularly good at it.
TNP has been swimming in the past month.