I like both. Apples and oranges.
Is this the Wills piece?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQ4oXhpgVEs
TNP prefers apples to oranges.
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I like both. Apples and oranges.
Is this the Wills piece?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQ4oXhpgVEs
TNP prefers apples to oranges.
My mobile connection is so poor at home I can't easily see if that's the one. Just the classic Bob Wills fiddling, and probably Tommy Duncan singing.
NEGATIVE Unless the orange is rotten or one of those weird soft fancy tiny oranges, I enjoy oranges. Apples....meh....yeah, if I were starving or dehydrated, they are a food, that's for sure.
TNP spoke curtly to work people today at least a few times. OR, I guess it's Saturday, so substitute sometime last week, for all you fancy people who don't work Saturdays. :)
Ond, yes, that is the Bob Wills record, now that I heard that track -- I just love that old fiddling.
Good god! It's a raid! Cut out the lights!
Hunh!
Yeah that's the original record I was thinking of.
Lawd! Unh. Bring on the juice! Make me sweat! Hunh!
No, can't think of anyone I've been curt to in awhile now.
TNP knows one Curt and one Kurt.
NO, actually IRL I don't know anyone by those names. ETA And actually, I don't think I ever have IRL. I have also never been a communist nor can I name names!
TNP is disappointed more people don't use (i) my woman (ii) my old lady to talk about their SOs.
I think it's weird and should be punished by waterboarding.
TNP has eaten pizza in the last 41.8 hours.
No, because I stopped being a perpetually-hungover fratboy over the .... wait a minute ... well, the answer is still no, but only because I forgot to get a frozen pizza at the grocery!
TNP is overjoyed that Trojan Man finally stopped menstruating and started coming 'round here more often.
False.
TNP is looking forward to easter.
Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. No, I can't think that far ahead.
TNP has used the term "mutha" IRL (you remember, with real people and out loud and shit) recently.
Nah, that would totally not work for me.
TNP commonly dresses in such a way as to be easily mistaken for an off-duty cop.
Oh HELL no. Maybe I could be mistaken for a fancy lad or a generic office drone, but not a cop.
TNP can explain exactly what an off-duty cop looks like! I figure just a regular working class Joe Sixpack, except with the donut gut and the porn moustache. But I could be wrong. Maybe just strutting around like the King of Siam attitude?
Some cops I know have some or all of those attributes - others none!
TNP has talked to a friendly cop in the past month.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! No, my cousin was a cop for a stint in the roughest part of town, and there are some regular people. But, no, I just don't get involved if I can help it.
TNP thinks something about that job just makes customs agents really disagreeable.
I have met more than a few curt and/or surly customs officers over the years, it's true.
TNP will try this the next time he or she crosses an international border: when the customs officer asks you if you have any firearms, ammunition, explosives, drugs or other contraband, look over one shoulder, then the other, and then lean in and whisper with a sly smile, "What do you need?"
Yeah, that's guaranteed to end up with laughs all-around and knee-slapping hilarity. In a dark room with a single bright lamp. Naked.
TNP laments humanity when you hold your hand out for a low-five hand slap and the other person tries to shake your hand instead.
Probably would if I ever tried it.
TNP has developed a sudden obsession recently.
Hmmm. No, my obsession with Keira Knightley is over a decade old now.
TNP has seen at least three Keira Knightley movies: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keira_...ey#Filmography
Hell yeah. Even at least one of those Pirate Caribbean movies. I think she's fantastic, and from what little I know of her relationship to the press, she's on the good side of trying to stick up for women who don't want to be just another piece of ass.
TNP is not ever going to watch all those Pirate/Carib movies -- they may be entertaining (if you have a head injury, or a BAC of 4.5%), but still, a little much.
True. I've missed the last two.
TNP would like to visit the Caribbean this year.
I'd be OK with that, but my travel plans probably aren't going that way.
TNP has been to Barbados.
Yes, just once, as a kid on a family trip. A beautiful place, and I had a good time.
TNP knew that George Washington's only trip outside what is now the U.S. was to Barbados: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George...use_(Barbados)
No.
TNP knows a classic jazz tune called "Barbados," however.
I didn't before now, but I found this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0FJ1SdS-ts
TNP wonders, if the Bird had been clean and sober, he'd've been as talented.
Well, that's the standard meme, but I don't think so at all. HOWEVER, if one is unhappy or feels like he or she is missing something in his or her personal life, I've no doubt expression is hindered. So. "As talented"? YES "As emboldened to create prolific records and compositions?"" Perhaps not
TNP doesn't think anyone from Bird's time/place/social milieu could have ever really been described as "clean" by straight America's standards. Sober? Sure, lots of great musicians were. "Clean"? Damn few. Maybe John Lewis or some of the more art-house high-class artists.
Sounds about right.
TNP thinks jazz clubs would be OK if you didn't have to put up with jazz snobs when you went to one.
Pretty much.
TNP can see snow out the window right now.
Yeah, in my minds eye I see mountains of pure Colombian snow, because that's probably about the amount of natural product it would take for me to get through another month at the job.
TNP enjoys bullshitting with regular, blue-collar folks -- you know, jokes, trading comments, and all that.
I'm OK with it, since it's the background I came from. I dislike it when the jokes and comments get racist and weird, though.
TNP likes pretty much every kind of whiskey.
Well, some of the ones with a sweeter "nose" or taste or whatever the term is aren't preferred. I also don't particularly care for Scotch.
But I'll drink it all, so, YES.
TNP can name a hard liquor he or she REALLY would rather drink water than consume.
No, but there's a lot I've never tried.
TNP will be in bed by midnight tonight.
HAHAHAHAHA!!!! If I wanted to really get ahead in life, I'd wake up at 0 or 0100 hours, instead of slacking and waking up 0200 or, more often 0230 and hitting the snooze button a few times.
Slackers.
TNP is not that pleased with how ball games are presented on television. And, if not, can explain some reasons why.
Nah, I don't have any particular criticism.
TNP has heard a Rolling Stones song today.
NO but yesterday they blasted "Satisfaction" over the crappy PA speaker they play crap over. Heard Steely Dan yesterday and today, and it wasn't bad -- can't beat the lyric to "Deacon Blues."
TNP thinks it's really too bad only the shit "good" jobs in the USA aren't afforded representation by unions. Alternate TNP, maybe semi-skilled or unskilled laborers should start unionizing like a motherfuck. ETA in the US.
Yes, I'd support many more American workers becoming unionized, to raise wages, improve workplace safety and enhance benefits.
TNP has to get up early tomorrow.
Already there. Put myself down by 18:00, woke up at 01:30 with my computer still playing Rocky & Bullwinkle cartoons. Noticed I forgot to set my alarm. Damned lucky.
TNP thinks there's really about only one legitimate use of the word "muffin" in the typical workplace. Hint: "I want to peek at your muffin, baby" is not that use.
Sure, I'll go along with that.
TNP thinks a muffin would taste good right about now.
Uhhhh, yeah, sure. Yep. No further comment.
TNP has seen somebody IRL who kind of resembles Leonard Lawrence (Lawrence Leonard?) anyway "Private Pyle" from Full Metal Jacket
Yeah, there are a few people around the warehouse -- sort of neckbeard (srsly? how lazy do you have to be not shave yur fucking face!), chunky (well, I'm no Carl Weathers, but yeah, you can be a bit large in the frame and STILL be sort-of strong, not just a puddle of chewed gum)....never mind. It's a whole combination of factors
TNP thinks women have the easy part of sex -- sure, they got to look good and be good, but they just sit there getting plugged.
'Tis all in the eye (and the loins) of the beholder.
TNP knows what an AD&D beholder is.
Sure, it's some dungeon/dragon thing, I guess. Beyond that, haven't got a clue. Something to do with that.
TNP can think of a cooler name to call a girl than "Morgan," like a nickname. Have to fix that, whether she likes it or not. Can't have it. Also,can't be generic, like "fly girl" or "g-spot." I can't be calling someone Morgan IRL. Gotta change it.
I'm gonna go with "Gorgeous." Or maybe "Sweet Thing"....
More on the beholder: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Behold...s_%26_Dragons)
TNP prefers card games to board games.
Yeah. I played Clue with the nephews about a month ago, and that was a blast from the past, but still, card games are more compact and just more easy to pass the time with. Plus, the good ones like Gin Rummy and Bridge are pretty challenging.
"Gorgeous" is a good one....however, not always multi-purpose appropriate. Got it: "MG." No, don't got it, too masculine, reminds me of Booker T. No, don't got nothing -- strange name, can't figure it out. Yeah, if I slipped her the little sizzler, I'd probably just call her "honey," or "gorgeous," just .... because I'm not that clever. Mothra? Martha? Jugs? Shorty? I got nothing. I do like "G-spot," but I couldn't use that even if I was boning her. She wouldn't like that, pretty sure.
ETA Oh!!!! That "Beholder" is like that weird floating thing from Big Trouble in Little China. Live and learn!
TNP can think of a dozen table-top games he or she would rather play than poker (any kind). EETA "Tabletop" I just mean any card game, or backgammon, or whatever. Monopoly counts. Any of that.
Sure: AD&D, Champions, Call of Cthulhu, Cards Against Humanity, UNO, Boggle, Scrabble, Pictionary, Scattergories, Monopoly, Settlers of Catan, Jenga. Never been a poker fan.
TNP has won more than $100 in one sitting at poker.
You know, drink Scotch whiskey all night long....No, I don't gamble at all, except for VERY low stakes, just for fun. Unless you have the percentages, seems not a good idea.
ETA "WareGirl" -- that's her name from now on. She'll learn to like once she gets some of the little sizzler and comes back for more.
TNP has been a little....shy? intimidated? shut-down? around someone IRL recently....sort of. Interpret that how you want.
Yes. Someone I hadn't seen in a long time, and our meeting was a little awkward.
TNP has had more than five phone calls today.
Probably. Spam calls have cut down in frequency lately, but they're not zero. Nothing important, though, or I have this system for not having to look at my phone more than necessary, which would have alerted me. One hopes.
TNP has sent many more pages of personal correspondence using an old-fashioned typewriter than a comparable amount of pages in handwriting.
No, I've only typed on a typewriter only a tiny fraction of all the letters I've done on a computer.
TNP still owns and at least occasionally uses a typewriter.
No. Still own, but I dont want to deal with cleaning out dust and rolling up some new spools of ink. Reminds me of car or electronics repair -- not my favorite way to spend an hour or so.
TNP can explain in a few words what makes some people really enjoy all that fixing/maintaining various equipment. I don't get it.
Nope. I'm with you on that one.
TNP has stepped on a big, crunchy bug recently.
Well, sort of, in a kind of drug (LEGAL!) induced sleep, there were some cockroaches and I relished watching them perish, sometimes at my hand.
TNP thinks if some....hehehe...like a girl...hehehe...a girl! says to you "It was nice talking to you," there could be a better response than giving them a friendly smile and saying, "Yep! Have a good one!"
Uh, yeah, I can think of several, and it's not like I have a lot of game.
TNP has a definite preference between an Old Fashioned and a Manhattan.
No, I'm not sure I've ever had either.
TNP has been to Alaska.
Nope. I know quite a few people who live there, ab origin(o?e?) though. I think my Latin's gotten rusty.
TNP thinks saying "It was nice talking to you too" is WAY lamer than Uncle Jizz's way of saying "Yep! Have a good one!" or similar. However TNP will supply an awesome response. E.g., "We should talk more," that would have been cooler.
Sure, I guess. How about, "Have a better one," from Blade Runner?
TNP thinks that would be cool.
Yeah, sort of "cool" in the Highlander sense of it makes me want to cut someone's head off with a sword.
TNP makes a ton a really REALLY stupid mistakes every week.
No, only a relative handful, I'd say.
TNP wore a scarf at some point today.
No, not the right weather out here. Although! Yes, I complain about the hipsters and the metrosexuals, but scarves are functional and appropriate clothing when needed, so I wear them when needed, sometimes just to keep the wind off the back of my neck.
TNP can explain exactly what/where/why the word "kicky" can be applied to articles of clothing like....scarves....and other stuff, I guess. Strange fashion word.
Good question. Maybe, um, someone who wore something like that might kick up her heels in joy to be so well-dressed...? Or not.
TNP has an alternate theory for the same question.
Nope, got nothing.
TNP is pretty bored right now.
Of course not. Every day is a brand new adventure waiting to happen.
TNP can think of an better (good line(s))+(crappy song) combination than: "Time keeps on slipping Into the future" (Steve Miller, "Fly Like An Eagle"...ugh)
Nope. Never liked that song.
TNP has been to a rock concert in the past month.
No. AFAIC there isn't any more rock music except as a fringe element -- it's all synth-pop with hip-hop elements. People still play bad guitar, but you're not likely to hear acoustic/electric pianos or Hammonds, or unprocessed vocals, except in a "retro" group or a nostalgia revival. I and Ben Gazzara from Road House prefer music "with balls," like Body Count, in addition to disliking men who are bleeders.
Yes, "Fly Like an Eagle" is the crappiest of songs! But it had that one good line.
TNP thinks that the slackers have won, but their days are over.
Certainly not. Slackers will rise again! Every era has them.
TNP remembers learning about Ancient Roman slackers in school.
Nah, but I don't remember learning about much in school.
TNP is not a fan of the educational system.
Neutral. I think education is too important to be left in the hands of teachers. No, I don't have a better solution, so I'm happy to endorse the current NA and European systems -- in fact, I think the merits of the US system of HS are, in some ways, better than the centralized control, tending to elitism, of, say, the French. I don't know anything about Canadian systems, except that Canadians in anglophone regions aren't really savvy about French language, even though they're supposed to learn it. Well, nobody learns a language in HS (or equivalent) anyway, so it's no complaint.
TNP has kind of settled into a new daily routine involving work/transportation/commute-home duties (grocery, have a beer, get gas, etc.). OR has always had such a routine.
Yes, I've been doing things a bit differently for the past week, and so far, so good.
TNP will be voting in a primary election in the next few weeks.
Nope, don't have such a thing.
TNP will be voting in a parliamentary election in the next few months.
Sure. I'm going to write a ballot to the pommies suggesting that the Queen Mum is a filthy, diseased turd who should be drowned, along with her defective family.
TNP really only pays attention in local elections to prosecutors, judges. Damned incumbents.
No, I'm pretty diligent about finding out about all the candidates before I vote.
TNP knows that the Queen Mum died in 2002.
Oh, that one. NEGATIVE.
TNP can explain why it is that Americans seem to be obsessed with the affairs of some British royals.
Yes, I can. I believe most Americans strongly identify with Anglo-Germanic culture, and, also like looking at photographs of mongoloided hybrid creatures.
TNP knew that the Cleveland Indians and the Yankees have a rivalry that extends back about a hundred years.
I wouldn't have guessed that long, but yet.
TNP will answer his own question, just like Jizz.
No, I would never, ever do that.
TNP would like to visit New York City before Christmas.
Negative. I like New York in June.
TNP resembles a (i) Chatty Cathy doll or (ii) a small Mexican chihuahua
Wrong on both counts (at least, no one's ever compared me to those!).
TNP has owned either a Chatty Cathy doll or a small Mexican chihuahua.
Neither.
TNP likes butter chicken.
Don't think I've ever had it, but I like fried chicken, so I'm certainly willing to try!
TNP remembers the butter shave episode of Seinfeld.
NO! I thought I've seen them all. And FTR EH reminds me of a small Mexican chihuahua. Never mind, it's from a David Lynch promo interview on Letterman
TNP will name a favorite "Jerry's girl of the week."
Wow, I didn't realize there were so many!: http://kramersapartment.com/jerry/je...s-girlfriends/
I think my favorite was Nina "No awkward pauses!" Stengel: http://kramersapartment.com/jerry/je...s/#NinaStengel
Some highlights of the butter shave episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_F4DTGx6AMo
TNP thinks the first season of Seinfeld was pretty bad.
No, they all are blurred together in my mind, so I couldn't say.
TNP thinks Jerry's "fashion" sense is ridiculous.
No, for its time, I think it was OK. Other than the Puffy Shirt, naturally.
TNP has said, at least once in everyday conversation, "But I don't wanna be a pirate!"
Yes, actually. Don't remember the occasion, but definitely true.
TNP is annoyed at having to drive somewhere today in a car.
No, I only made one trip today, to church and back. No annoyances.
TNP is listening to an audiobook these days.
Nah, haven't listened to audiobooks much since I was recovering from the eye surgery.
TNP has had a detached retina.
Holy shit no. That's one of the more popular methods to permanently become a George Shearing impersonator, though.
TNP would rather be blind than deaf, ignoring the fact that most errant noises are a horror.
No, although I'd hate to be either, I'd rather be deaf. I'd much rather be able to see the world around me, and still be able to read, than to be able to hear (much as I'd miss hearing music).
TNP has had an earworm lately.
Listening to it right now. It's called every James Brown tune he ever made after he turned to heavy funk.
TNP thinks superglue is over-rated, compared to good old duck tape.
ETA I forgot, "Autumn in New York" is also a good one. But, no, I suspect NYC and now Brooklyn has just become overrun with great hordes of hipster assholes. Hell, about fifteen years ago the East Village was unrecognizable, full of a bunch of little kid shitheads.Quote:
Originally posted by Jizzelbin
Nah, they each have their uses.Quote:
Originally posted by Jizzelbin
TNP has seen a Sopranos episode in the past week.
No. I think I've seen a total of maybe five or six episodes ever.
TNP will name a supposedly iconic show he or she is barely aware of, except by hearsay.
The Wire.
TNP can name another one.
The Wire.
TNP can name another one.
Ditto The Wire. Also, never seen an episode of Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, or even an entire episode of Friends, which shocks me that apparently it was really popular back then.
TNP will name some famous (among media-buffs, at least) older show that he or she has seen lots of that would probably surprise people of his or generation.
Never saw The Wire (although my sister loves it) or The Walking Dead. I'm a big fan of Game of Thrones and was, back in the day, of Friends too.
I watched Fantasy Island whenever it was on.
Nah, that's not that surprising. You're not that much older than me, and even I know drek like that, along with stuff like The Love Boat.
TNP can name the most obscure TV Western-themed show that lasted more than a season, and will describe its merits.
ETA although I will say it makes it so much more amusing when you see Ricardo Montalban show up in some obscure bad movies. Of course, Khan!!!!!!!!! was his shining hour, actually, both figuratively and literally, but he's been in other stuff. I'm pretty sure he did not drive a Cadillac, though. Probably out of resentment for those stupid commercials.
False. I don't know much at all about TV Westerns.
It was actually a Chrysler that Montalban was pitching, BTW, not a Cadillac: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrysler_Cordoba
TNP has savored the feel of rich Corinthian leather.
Well, I was schooled with a strap right 'cross my back. But it's all right now.
TNP will choose a favorite among: (i) rum (ii) sodomy (iii) the lash.
Well, I was schooled with a strap right 'cross my back. But it's all right now.
TNP will choose a favorite among: (i) rum (ii) sodomy (iii) the lash.
Rum, please!
TNP is a Churchill fan.
Not really. He was a poor W.C. Fields imitator, and his arrogant comments about mastering the classical languages are inappropriate, given that he was a poor student of Latin and knew none Attic Greek. Whatever his merits as an orator and soldier, I think he was a piece of shit as a person of honest character.
TNP would like to get into a fistfight but as both a (i) lazy (ii) prudent person would not.
There've certainly been people I wanted to deck, so yes, I guess so. More prudent than lazy.
TNP has been thrown out of a bar or pub.
Only in one tiny, but inexplicably well-known, "city" in the USA, known for having an overwhelmingly white, soft, doughy population full of children. Nowhere else.
TNP did not know that Bernie Worrell (one of the tny handful of purely instrumental pop keyboardists of importance) died not too long ago.
Never heard of him before, so that's true.
TNP first heard of Bernie Worrell before turning 18.
No, actually, I think just at about exactly age 18.
TNP thinks his or her higher-frequency speakers (i.e.&e.g.., "tweeters" in the parlance of our time) are insufficient to support high-powered amplification of a loop of a dog whistle, at least using any of the directional properties of his or her cabinet properties with any effect Bonus TNP: TNP thinks this is not a very satisfactory problem to have, and it should probably be corrected.
Don't have the foggiest idea, so I'll say no.
TNP has spent more than $200 on stereo components at a time.
Sure. If you include live sound/"pro-Audio" sound-reinforcement equipment, that's easy. None of my home turntable+cartridge, receiver/amplifier, optical disc players or speakers aka "stereo" stuff ever cost that much though, I don't think, singly -- not really into the whole "audiophile" scene. Although IMHO $200 will buy you a perfectly adequate any of those. Maybe more on speakers, but I like my old-school Altecs just fine.
TNP thinks the audiophiles are pretty entertaining, whatever one thinks of the merits of their hobby.
Entertaining is not the word I would have used, no.
TNP has more than one hobby.
Sure: reading, watching movies and cycling, to name only three.
TNP is passionately interested in something that interests very few other people.
No. Everything I've ever been interested in is pretty fully described and commented in the mainstream academic literature. I don't have any hobbies that don't relate to things with an historical pedigree that is long and storied. I don't know, like building fake yaks out of papier mâché and trying to animate them with home-built electronics to encourage them to produce delicious milk. That would, in my mind, be an example of something very few people would be interested in. And yet, who knows.
TNP has ever stopped playing a game with a perfect tie (for example, 1 win, 1 loss).
No, I don't think so, although a friend refused to play chess with me ever again after beating me the one and only time we ever played! Grrrr.
TNP can name a game he or she has played once and only once.
Yeah, I played Backgammon IRL once and only once. I thought it was stupid. I did find an "app" against which to play my computer, which I tried a number of times, but IMO, it doesn't really count as a game if your only opponent is a computer.
TNP secretly laughs in a mocking, superior tone when he or she sees people playing video poker, or whatever those machines are.
No, all those desperate people hunched over the machines in casinos depress me more than they amuse me.
(I played backgammon once and only once, too. Just didn't grab me.)
TNP has played Tetris more than five times.
True. Many thousands of times.
ETA Casinos???? What are those? Yeah, I guess they have all that. In my state, video poker (I'm assuming they're all some variation on that) is pretty much in every single bar, and they tend to be heavily used. Tetris, OTOH THAT'S an example of a game that really only can be executed against a computer. Maybe Jenga is the RW version, or something. Also, pinball, the old-school mechanical versions: also a game you play against a machine. Examples abound, I'm sure.
TNP is aware of what I think "they" call "the Tetris effect," and has experienced it. (Also works for chess, and maybe some other games -- where you just start superimposing on the world the actions of the game. Spooky, but not inexplicable.) Alternate TNP: TNP has played the arcade game version of Tetris.
False as to both.
TNP will explain the Tetris effect.
Sure. It's just when you start superimposing (subconsciously? I don't think that's a real term in current neuropsychology, but you probably know what I mean) the figures from the game onto real life situations. I don't know, like between a full visual hallucination, and thinking, like, I don't know "hey, my boss is like a vertically-inverted 'L'-shape, so could fit over there."
It sounds batshit crazy, but it's a real thing. Truth to power: never play Tetris.
TNP has ever thought recently about pitching a wang dang doodle, all night long. Alternate TNP: TNP has spent more than a few hours playing pinball, IRL.
No to both. Never really cared for pinball.
TNP will see a movie in a theater this weekend.
No way. I'm movied out. Even then, I'd rather watch at home than bother finding parking, dealing with the hordes of OVERLY-washed masses, and smelling that kind of appealing/kind of gross popcorn smell.
LOOK at EH!. Never wanting to pitch a wang dang doodle. That boy is never going to get laid with an attitude like that!
TNP tried a bartender-concocted drink, and it wasn't too bad, at some point in his or her life, and will explain. Some kind of peach schnapps in my case, with some other unknown stuff, shaken, so it was like some bits of shaved/broken ice. Plus, it was the bartender's treat, so it was free.
Yes, I had a bartender-concocted chocolate martini once that was surprisingly good. Usually I just have a beer or a glass of wine, though.
TNP has been to Wooster, Ohio, where I had my martini.
Nah, still haven't been to Ohio, although I am meaning to go.
TNP has been to both Cleveland and Cincinnati.
Correct, although far more to the first than to the second.
TNP has visited at least ten American states.
Hmm. No, I guess not, using my stricter definition of visiting: for at least a day or two, some quite a few times, including living there for at least a few months. Just for fun, let me see: OR, WA, CA, MT, NY, PA, GA, MN (MN was only one night, and I didn't really "visit" it so much as "get me the hell out of here. i'll be taking some of those donuts and some coffee, thank you very much."). Traveling through, without really stopping or sight-seeing, or at least spending a night? That's quite a few more, but I'm not sure if those really count as "visiting." Nowhere "down south" except GA.
TNP can predict with about 80% certainty when a woman is ovulating.
Dunno, probably not.
TNP likes Campari.
Never had it, so no, I guess.
TNP will have lunch outside today.
What is outside? Is there things outside of the world? No. I will be lunching with an open window looking onto some trees, though.
TNP feels like an idiot for betting money on a pool game, or whatever other games of skill people bet on.
Not in a long time, so no. I tend to go with safe bets.
TNP has won at least a hundred bucks on a bet with a friend.
No, for things like "Who's going to win such-and-such election?" those tend to be gentleman's bets, or maybe a friendly small wager of a small gift or favor. And FTR, my $5 pool game bet wasn't not a sure thing: I'd beaten the guy before, although he's a better pure shot-maker and we're about even in position play and defense. It was a safe bet, given that among decent-ish pool players luck isn't a factor. Anyway, I got a cheap lesson out of it, and am the better player for it.
TNP has drunk recently that pink wine, call it rosé, blush, or what have you.
Recently? Been a few weeks, so I guess not.
TNP has added a shot of gin to a wine of that type.
False. Never occurred to me.
TNP has added gin, vodka (aka "skip run and go naked") and whiskey ("boilermaker") to beer, and liked it.
No, but I wouldn't be averse to trying it.
TNP has heard the story about Sargent Shriver trying to be "one of the boys" in a blue-collar bar during the 1972 Presidential campaign.
No, sir. But that sounds damned entertaining, and I hope there'll be a chance to hear a good story out of it.
TNP has ever had to leave work because of moderate-to-severe pain. Alternate TNP: TNP will tell the, what I imagine to be a Dukakis tank-driving embarrassing scenario, story of this person trying to hang with regular folks.
Never because of pain, fortunately, but once because I was sicker than I thought that morning and had to go home at midday (and barfed on the way home).
The (apocryphal) story is that Shriver was campaigning as the Dem nominee for VP and went to a blue-collar bar. After working the room, he said, "You guys are great! Bartender, a beer for everyone - and a Courvoisier for me!"
TNP has had a Courvoisier in the past year.
Yeah, right. What do I look like, Billy Buckley?
ETA Out of curiosity I did look up that story earlier. That's...well, that's about right as far as politicians go. What a rube -- he could have had somebody on his staff write a white paper on "What is it human proletariats drink?"
TNP has ever drank a full glass/bottle of either Triple-Sec or vermouth (any kind) straight-up.
Definitely not.
TNP has a car which needs some work.
I guess. The struts are shot, but I don't care about that. After a pothole/"abrupt edge" replacement of two tires, there's a worrisome shimmy in the right rear wheel. That should be replaced. Beyond that, I don't know. What am I, a lead-foot, gearhead, motorhead? Oh yeah, I still need to get some PC-7 epoxy and get that driver's-side side-view mirror a little better, but, meh, that's just a detail for nerds. It's fine, it's got a cop motor, a cop transmission, and it doesn't have a catalytic converter so it will run good on regular gas. Also, needs an adult-sized ashtray, not this Japanese cute-sized shit.
ETAVermouth is a very good wine, straight up. Zesty, has all those herbs and stuff. It's not an odd thing to drink. Triple-sec, though, no, like most liqueurs was created by businessmen in alliance with some weirdo monks who think it's a funny joke to create aberrations like .... well, pick any liqueur, they're all pretty nasty IMHO
TNP encounters frequently a woman (or "woman") who has apparently zero sense of humor, who should probably be electroshock-therapied into being a non-bitch.
Hmm, some I've disliked for various reasons, but none about which I'd say that.
TNP knows someone who's had electroshock therapy.
Uhhhh....that guy, Eagleton from the late-1960s/early-'70s presidential election? No, not really.
TNP is not averse to applying current and potential directly to his or her own body. Just to see what would happen. but would not drink his or her own urine, because that's stupid and gross
Yes, I am averse to applying a lot of current and electrical potential across my body, since I'm not exactly sure how to compute the size of a grounding pole I'd have to stick up my urethra or earhole or whatever.
TNP thinks it's probably time to talk about what happens when the next month's bill comes due and I might not be able to be your benefactors.
Also, admin, mode -- that's not me, nobody wants that, I don't want the access or the power, and I should not be considered. That's why you don't let the monkey have the machine gun.
Sure, why not?Quote:
Originally posted by Jizzelbin
TNP suspects that Jizz is actually an expatriate Russian plutocrat and multibillionaire.
I don't know what any of those words mean, they're fancy. And I can hardly be suspicious of myself. No. I will not be trapped by these gibberish words and plots.
TNP thinks one early symptom of delinquency is pressing the snooze button on an alarm clock more than a few times during one "waking up" session.
That and not obeying your parents and skipping school, yeah.
TNP has visited a juvenile court.
Does prosecuting count as visiting?
TNP is sometimes a little surprised at remembering some of the stuff they have done.
Every time I make the mistake of trying to remember. True. But also perhaps not, because after all, I was the agent, and it isn't a surprise, since I did it...er....those....things.
TNP has caught a few seconds of the French Open this year and can share an opinion about Djokovich or Cecchinato, or the match in general, or clay-court tennis in general.
Nope. Unlike my dad, I'm not a tennis fan.
TNP has been bowling in the past year.
Yeah, sure. I love fingering somebody else's disgusting used ball. I'll even give it the three-fingered Jack. That's a negative, Ghost Rider. The pattern is full. ETA OK, to be fair, racking up fifteen or fourteen or nine balls on a table involves a LOT more ball-handling, but you only have to do it once in a while. Pool's a high-rate hooker's game, where bowling is a rock-ho's game, where you have to touch the balls a LOT more often
TNP thinks soaking one's hands in very hot water can be better if adding epsom salts, or if the latter is just some old wives' tale.
Yeah, could be, although I've never done it myself.
TNP has seen Deadpool 2.
Nah. Maybe someday, no big deal.
TNP actually hasn't seen a movie in a few months.
No, I usually see a movie every other week or so (and Deadpool 2 is good, raunchy, ultraviolent fun).
TNP knows a military veteran.
Yeah. Who doesn't? People I see every day are an Army Captain, helicopter guy, and a Navy enlisted man. I talk with the latter quite a bit, but conversation usually ends up around how much boxing and basketball he used to do while he was in. Lots of others in the recent past, and in the present I'm not thinking of. And some who are in the uniformed services to this day.
TNP thinks you can measure the jib of a service veteran by how wild his or her stories are. The bigger the better.
Definitely not. The real heroes tend not to be so talkative.
TNP has held a Purple Heart medal in his or her hand.
I can't be sure, because of my young age and the long-deadness of relative, but paternal grandfather (WWII), I think had one of those and some other stuff. No idea -- it was just a kind of little wooden box with a bunch of war stuff in it (tiny, like 10cmx10cmx6cm, and, IIRC, a rosary. I think that was the first time my mother told me that some people believed in the crucifix Jesus above my bed and all that, and I literally could not countenance such an idea. I think I must have been four or so, because I know I said so. I was kind of a shitty little kid.
TNP is surprised by how many military veterans he or she has actually become friendly/acquaintancely/co-workerly with over the years.
no, I wasn't talking about combat stories, just tales of people who just enlisted, or were commissioned, and have tall tales to tell about "this time in training" and other funny anecdotes. I've never heard anybody talk about combat IRL.
I have several veterans as friends, but I can't say I'm surprised to.
TNP needs to buy some stamps.
Naw. I got enough outdated stamps in weird denominations to fulfill my current needs.
TNP does not want to go to Walmart, and will explain why.
Nah, I'm OK with Walmart, though I seldom feel any real need to go.
TNP wants to know what Jizzelbin's deal is with Walmart.
Of course no: I know what the deal is. There aren't that many places around to use Walmart gift cards, except Walmart. It's also way the fuck out in the goddamned hell-realm, and a real hassle to get to, with traffic and the rock whore banshee trophy wives and shit.
TNP can explain to me why I shouldn't, looking ahead into the summer, buy me some cargo shorts -- knee length, pockets. Seems fine to me.
I won't stand in your way. T-shirts and khaki shorts are practically my summer uniform.
TNP has 'way too many T-shirts.
Nah, I don't have nearly enough of any kind of clothes, except I probably have too many orange golf shirts.
TNP needs to overhaul their closets.
Yeah, I have 'way too many T-shirts! Sometimes the piles are bit too high and tottering.
TNP has lived through an earthquake.
Yeah, a few when I was younger. Nothing earth-shattering. Well. Maybe.
TNP is kind of more of a fan of T-shirts with breast pocket, plain colors, or golf shirts, than other kinds of short-sleeved shirts. If not, explanation is required.
No, most of my T-shirts have a logo or picture of some kind. I think I only have a couple with breast pockets, and don't have many golf shirts. That just how I roll!
TNP has heard a dog bark today.
No. Therefore it's been a great day so far.
TNP witnessed yet again an aggressive act by an automobile enthusiast against correct drivers who yield to pedestrians, as is mandated. Alternate TNP, TNP prefers to phrase what apparently is a battle between the needle-dicked limp-shaft gearheads and pedestrians in terms of rights: a pedestrian has the right, in general, to use the road. A vehicle operator has to ask permission from the state. One is right, the other is wrong, barring related but irrelevant further infractions.
No, although I did have to turn a little abruptly last night and got beeped at by a car that was following me too closely.
TNP has seen a live wombat.
No.
TNP thinks whipping would be an appropriate, immediate remedy to drivers who fail to realize that at thirty-five miles an hour, it takes six fucking car lengths to stop a car. Robert Loggia in Lost Highway it right. For the nerds out there, the batman probably would have done some extrajudicial Mr. Eddy/Robert Loggia-style punishment just to keep the roads clear of human trash.
Having never seen Lost Highway, I'm gonna say... true?
TNP has owned at least six cars during his or her life so far.
Actually, don't think so. During long stretches in the Arctic, didn't own a car at all, and tend to keep cars until their repair costs outweigh the costs of a new one. (And counting the cars in my wife's name as "owning".)
TNP likes shopping for liquor better than any other kind of shopping.
No, I think I like shopping for books, music or, hmm... neckties best. I buy liquor very rarely - a bottle or two last me for a long time.
TNP bought a large bottle of booze in the past week.
No. I've bought twenty liters of wine in the past week, but liquor....not for two or three weeks.
TNP thinks wine falls more in the good category than the "hooch" category.
That was supposed to be "food" category. It can also be "good," but so can plenty of spirits or beer.Quote:
Originally posted by Jizzelbin
Food. Not good. Primarily food.
Nah, I don't think of wine as "hooch", (unless it's the cheap port that winos drink) but I don't think of it as "food", either. Just wine.
TNP is having pizza tonight.
No, I did two or three nights ago (pepperoni and pineapple, yum), but not tonight.
TNP thinks pepperoni and pineapple pizza is an abomination unto God.
Yes, with pepperoni, that's probably an odd combination -- too strong a sausage (because, you know, the peppers). Now thinly sliced back bacon or other ham + pineapple is very good. I'd order a slice of that if some pizza joint only had that and some gross hippie-looking vegan crap, or something else I didn't want at that moment, like the otherwise-good breakfast pizza (eggs, potato, other stuff). However, I wouldn't really trust it a pizza joint where they warm it up in the oven -- seems like a bacteria minefield.
ETA RET: "(unless it's the cheap port that winos drink)" Goddammit.
TNP made the mistake of trying a bite of a vegan pizza slice ONCE.
Alternate TNP: TNP wants to know what the hell RET was doing in the damned Arctic.
Nope, never had vegan pizza, and am in no particular hurry to try it.
TNP really should clean out his or her basement.
Don't have a basement. However, pretty much everything else needs a cleaning. Maybe even a vacuuming. Well, no, but a good tidying up at least.
TNP is looking forward to removing some of the suck from Star Wars: The Last Jedi by listening to a commentary, for example, by RiffTax, in the near future. $3.99! It's supposed to be funny! There is word on the street that porgs might be roasted. Many bothans died to get you this information.
No, I don't think I need to see that movie again anytime soon.
TNP is enjoying air conditioning right now.
No. I nourish my soul with the sufferings of my flesh.
TNP has recently completely misread a road map, and therefore is an idiot.
Nah, haven't looked at a road map since GPS became common, and even then didn't feel particularly bad about not being able to read all the nasty squiggles.
TNP has used Web MD in the past month.
No, it's been quite awhile.
TNP could use a new smartphone these days.
No. I could use a new Android mini-tablet, though, for playing bridge and gin rummy on.
TNP should probably start using some smart-phone features (i.e., features more bloated than texting and playing music) but sort of doesn't want to.
True. I use my phone for talking, texting, checking the news and occasionally Google Maps, and that's about it.
TNP has consulted Google Maps in the past week.
Yep. Had to figure out how to get to this WalMart in an exurb. Unfortunately the map was not conventionally oriented with up == North.
TNP thinks digitized maps (or its attendant sub-industry GIS) is actually pretty cool, but doesn't have a problem reading the squiggly lines in topo maps and everything.
Yup. I'm old school usually when it comes to maps, but Google Maps does come in handy now and then.
TNP has seen at least three dogs today.
No, I've seen none dogs today or yesterday. I have however thought quite a bit (meaning, for me, some) about possibly introducing a large, powerful dog into my houshold sometime in the next ten years.
TNP has a rival IRL.
Not really, no.
TNP needs a nap.
No, for my essential fluids might leak out.
TNP can explain why people wear cotton T-shirts for exercise/strenuous activity: you know, because of them getting soaked with sweat and basically never drying out. Comfortable when dry, miserable when wet. They are the opposite of women.
Because they're cheap, can be easily changed and just as easily washed. I wear them for exercise and hard work, too.
TNP has visited West Virginia.
No, don't think so. Nothing against the place, just haven't made it.
TNP has been to Kansas.
Drove through part of it once in 1983 but didn't see much, and remember even less.
TNP wants to see Deadpool 2.
Sure. I still have a large number of older movies I've been meaning to see, so it's not on top of the priority queue; however, if I felt I could spare an hour or three, that would be the recent movie I'd choose, with weighted value for amusing novelty.
TNP has recently worn a T-shirt with a beer logo on its front and will describe it, or, will explain why he or she refuses. (Recent == I don't know, years, months, weeks. I don't know what "recent" means, so it's up to you).
I have no particular objection to beer-logo T-shirts, but have never owned one. Just not how I roll.
TNP has had a beer in the past two days.
Nah, mostly drink cocktails these days.
TNP has had a cocktail in the past two days.
No. I will not pay the vigorish debt my bar demands, and I'm too lazy to make an extra stop at the liquor store.
TNP has a pretty strong feeling that white wines should be served chilled .
Definitely, no matter the vintage or time of year.
TNP has more than five bottles of wine in the house.
No. I do have five liters of wine in a box, roughly seven 750ml bottles, which I pour into liter-sized bottles and refrigerate. If I had a beer-can helmet, they'd fit perfectly.
TNP prefers plastic to glass bottles for pretty much any food-type product.
Yeah, maybe environmentally problematic, but glass is a huge pain, with the weight and the breaking and so forth.
TNP likes biscuits and gravy.
Shit yeah.
TNP hasn't had a picker's breakfast of chicken-fried steak, hash browns, white gravy, toast, and eggs in a dog's age, and thinks that should be fxed.
Yum. True, and sounds good!
TNP has eaten octopus in the past year (as I just did).
No. I'm afraid of eating an animal probably smarter than me. But I'd chow down on that big bulbous head and tentacles if breaded and fried to a crisp, no question.
TNP has tried cooking squid at home and failed miserably.
Nope. Leave it to the professionals, sez I.
TNP is a generous tipper in restaurants.
Sort of. While I don't like restaurants, I do frequent one bar these days. Not generous, exactly, just consistent and correct. I think bartenders are probably liable to be suspicious — or at least take a hard second look at the person who tips extravagantly — of huge tippers. I think the big barroom tippers tend to be shitfaced drunks or possibly trying some kind of hustle, unless they're with a small group, then there's always that guy who wants to be the "big man," which is expected and fine. However, they notice when you just throw them an extra buck for every drink, without fail. I don't think they care too much, for just one person, they just like to be appreciated, in cash, and seem to be glad to have someone around who isn't causing trouble or doing shady shit. For food, I just go twenty percent or round up to whatever's convenient. Or else go full Bobby Dupea from Five Easy Pieces. It's just easier to not have to spend a lot of time computing the perfect amount — whatever seems right, and round up, rather than obsessing about the exact percentage.
TNP would rather be the janitor of the monkey cages at a roadside zoo than work in a kitchen.
Definitely not. Monkey cages would be nasty.
TNP has actually been inside a monkey cage.