Ask Aunt Roal

A new story entry has been added:

Ask Aunt Roal

Quote:

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http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a2...s/auntroal.jpg
Let's say you know with 100% certainty that a girl likes you a lot, possibly more than anyone because she's had a crush on you for years. But due to your history, you know she'll want to play hard to get with you. That's because she wants to get back at you for things you did in the past. A long chase from you will give her more pleasure than anything. At the same time you know her heart is pounding at the mere sight of you.
So here is what I'm planning to do. I want to sit down with her and tell her how much I care about her. And make it romantic. If she tries to play even a little bit of hard to get, I will wrap her in my arms and tell her to just be my girl. I would think if she's really into me, then it's going to be hard for her to resist.
I can't imagine her pushing me away if she likes me more than anyone. By that time, the feeling she has for me should eclipse her desire to torture me right?
Hopeful Romantic

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That's pretty good advice to that first guy as clearly he is a whackjob.

Out of curiousity, how is "Roal" pronounced?

Role, though that probably isn't the way it was originally pronounced. Nor the way it was spelled. It seems to only exist in American families of Norwegian descent, so somebody mangled a real name somewhere along the way and turned it into that.

...maybe like Roald, as in Roald Dahl?

I am a sucker for advice columns, BTW.

I'd make a good advice columnist. What do you want to know?

Quote:

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Originally posted by ivan astikov

I'd make a good advice columnist. What do you want to know?

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Dear Uncle Ivan,

I started out a few months ago with major car problems, my cherished Geo Prism, dependable for 12 years, took a dump on me. Then last month I started having major relationship problems, my wife of 3 years turned on me and I turned tail and ran. As I claw and scrape my way back into the civilized world I need to know one thing: Should I have another slice of pizza for lunch or should I wait until I get back to the house and have some more of my old mate's mom's meatloaf? Keeping in mind, of course, that the meatloaf does have some oatmeal in it and some sort of apple-cinnamon seasoning going for it.

Sincerely,
Bananas in Indiana

Choose whichever takes your fancy. You've already done the hard work by providing yourself with a choice.

There isn't a single life circumstance where it doesn't pay to have an option.

Thank you kind sir.

You have a brilliant future as a copywriter for a fortune cookie company.

Well, ivan, let's give you a couple more to answer, hm?

Quote:

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Why does my husband always argues with me and doesnt want to be with me?
when ever my husband comes home he doesn't be in a good mood and wants to argue all the time, he is a nit pick and then starts to argue over it and walks off... he finishes work at 6am. I be home alone most of the time. I dont know what to do i have 4 kids which i look after most of the time.

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That one is easy.

Wait until your partner has gone to work, then tell the children you are going to play a trick on Daddy.

Get them to help you remove all the furniture from the house into the back yard or garden, and then hide somewhere discreet and wait to see his face when he comes home.

If he looks overly happy and starts dancing like a demented fool, then you'll have a good reason to argue.

If he looks heartbroken, let the kids camp out for the night( after helping you carry a mattress back in) and then console your hubby like you know you can. But use a contraceptive this time.

I believe I've found my soulmate. <3

I'll accept another dilemma to try and solve if you want to be absolutely sure? Those two may have been flukes!

That first letter reminds me of somebody who used to post on the Dope. He should listen to Aunt Roal.