Nothing sucks the "convenience"...

...out of "convenience store" quite like the guy in front of you buying fifteen lottery tickets and five money orders. Not only does this nimrod buy fifteen scratch-offs - which he painstakingly selects one by one - but he starts scratching them off right there, without moving, oblivious to the five people behind him in line. And no help from the cashier; *I* had to say "Excuse me, please" in order to get him to grunt and move five feet down the counter.

Also, who the hell eats chicken wings at 7:30 in the morning?

Lame rant, I know. And really, it happened yesterday. But still. :fist:

First off, I eat chicken wings at 7:30 in the morning but as a before crashing snack, not as a breakfast. Secondly lots of the quick mart type places around here have signs that state that lottery must be played off site to try and keep a lid on that kind of thing. I have no problem barging up and banging my Red Bull down and just saying "Pack of Red Box?" to, ah, motiviate the transaction if needed though. Sometimes you have to make you own conveniance, you know?

I hate those idiots too. One thing I like about the WaWa chain is that they have no lottery tickets. They are fast and always clean.

Yesterday I got my order for lunch, walked next store to the tobacco shop where my friend was getting 3 lottery tickets and found he was stuck behind the idiot that was getting 25-30 tickets spread across 8 different game types. This moron was also slow to move out of the way as he was scratching the scratch offs.

As to chicken wings, I use to enjoy a piece of cold chicken in the morning as a quick breakfast. Not quite the same, but I could see the chicken wings as somewhat reasonable.

Fine guys, defend the morning chicken eater. :Shake: :wink


No, I probably wouldn't have even noticed his chicken if he'd been in and gone, but when I was already getting annoyed with him, everything becomes fair game, from his chicken wings, to his Newports, to his Arizona Mango Punch. Bastard.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by OneCentStamp

Fine guys, defend the morning chicken eater. :Shake: :wink


No, I probably wouldn't have even noticed his chicken if he'd been in and gone, but when I was already getting annoyed with him, everything becomes fair game, from his chicken wings, to his Newports, to his Arizona Mango Punch. Bastard.

---

Well, you did not say what type of wings. If they were hot wings, I would agree with the insane part. The Arizona Mango Punch is clearly abnormal for anyone over the age of 18 and from what little I can recall of my limited smoking days, Newports sucked.

Is that better?

I don’t even scratch off lotto tickets when I buy them anymore (yes, sometimes I throw a buck at the lotto, big deal). They have those scanner machines that tell you if you win or not and I just scan the ticket as soon as I buy it. If it wins I scratch it, if it doesn’t I toss it on the ground outside to give someone a little, if impotent thrill. I like the 5 second lotto.

I have a bizarre aversion to those lottery scratch-offs. They fill me with revulsion.

Where I grew up in Nevada, we didn't have those. What we did have, however, was slot machines. Lots of convenience stores had slot machines, in fact. But no sane, upstanding person who had self-control and a healthy sense of shame would ever be caught dead using one in a convenience store. No, you'd see tourists who didn't realize how pathetic they looked and the little old lady gambling addicts and various clueless types.

So when I moved to Wisconsin and was suddenly presented with these scratch-off tickets all over the place, they took over the space in my mind reserved for nickel slot machines in gas stations. Dude, you're gambling at the Kum & Go. :eek:

I know it's uncharitable of me, but I can't help it. To me, all gambling should involve a martini and a cigar.

http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a2...kumandgoNO.jpg

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Zuul

Dude, you're gambling at the Kum & Go. :eek:

---

Why on earth would you give your convenience store franchise a name that is evocative of a low-rent, drive-through hooker emporium?

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Orual

Why on earth would you give your convenience store franchise a name that is evocative of a low-rent, drive-through hooker emporium?

---

So that Cluricaun will feel welcome at oh dark thirty. When he needs to stock up on Red Bull, Cigarettes and chicken wings.

Damned skippy.

Just for all your morning hot wing haters - I just woke up about 60 minutes ago, and am making hot wings for breakfast. :p

Yummy yummy hot wings

You go Loki. I'm going to go downstairs right now and make fetal wings, or as most would call them scrambled eggs with wing sauce.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Cluricaun

You go Loki. I'm going to go downstairs right now and make fetal wings, or as most would call them scrambled eggs with wing sauce.

---

You are a strange and delightful man.

Well I am now......

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Zuul

Dude, you're gambling at the Kum & Go. :eek:

I know it's uncharitable of me, but I can't help it. To me, all gambling should involve a martini and a cigar.

---

Sometimes its gambling on a premium quality condom, but there can still be a martini and a cigar.

They do money orders at kwik-e-marts?

Yes, for a fee. I've seen fees for that service both higher and lower than the Post Office's money orders.

Next time, just lean over his shoulder and loudly wish him good luck. Apparently this is considered to be bad luck by many of the bobo's who gush huge bucks on these things.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by OneCentStamp

...out of "convenience store" quite like the guy in front of you buying fifteen lottery tickets and five money orders. Not only does this nimrod buy fifteen scratch-offs - which he painstakingly selects one by one - but he starts scratching them off right there, without moving, oblivious to the five people behind him in line. And no help from the cashier; *I* had to say "Excuse me, please" in order to get him to grunt and move five feet down the counter.

Also, who the hell eats chicken wings at 7:30 in the morning?

Lame rant, I know. And really, it happened yesterday. But still. :fist:

---

Guys like this never move aside, either. You have to reach past these counter hogs to get your business done.

A close relative of this guy is the fussy woman who cannot pour a God-damned fountain drink without getting exactly 9 ice cubes in the cup. Then there's the freaking multiple taps of the dispenser to make sure she gets every freaking quarter once of soda she's due.

And God help you if the napkins and salt packets are around the fountain...:Shake:

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Oliveloaf

the fussy woman . . . fountain drink

---

I swear, I've only ever seen women do that, too. They also have to get their carefully calibrated mix of 9 parts diet coke, 1 part regular coke, because that teaspoon of real coke you added totally made it taste exactly the same.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Exy

I swear, I've only ever seen women do that, too. They also have to get their carefully calibrated mix of 9 parts diet coke, 1 part regular coke, because that teaspoon of real coke you added totally made it taste exactly the same.

---

I think that is called sympathetic magic or maybe just pathetic, I forget.

Former clerk Here.

Lottery/scratch off players are the bottom rung of the convenience store customer ladder. The worst are the ones playing on a "system". The type that asks what number the ticket is on, how many winners have been cashed in, when was the last time someone bought one, what color was the car of the person who last bought a ticket, so on and so forth.

I don't know! No clerk actually knows! Wanna know why? Because we aren't dealers at the casino. The store gets the tickets in a package. All the winners are distributed throughout the deck. The tickets get sold. The clerk does not control who gets winners and who gets losers.

The worst though is when someone would come in to buy lotto, spend 10 minutes picking out scratch-offs, then spend another 10 getting the printed big game tickets. And then pulling out the debit card to pay. Um.. Hey shitfucker, you know that you can only pay cash for this stuff. You have known that since those laws were passed(at least in the last state I had worked as a counter jockey), so don't act surprised when I say no!

There are at least 2 former convenience store clerks here...you guys should totally start an "Ask the Former Convenience Store Clerk" thread. I'll bet there are some great stories to tell!

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Sarahfeena

There are at least 2 former convenience store clerks here...you guys should totally start an "Ask the Former Convenience Store Clerk" thread. I'll bet there are some great stories to tell!

---

But they were not even suppose to be here today.


;)

I just tried to start a "Ask The Clerk" thread but it keeps telling me I don't have permission to access the page.

I think What Exit is restricting the threads in the "Ask the Experts" forum. Try starting it in The Lounge...you should have no problem there. :)

Success!!

http://www.mellophant.com/forums/showthread.php?t=8798

Quote:

---

Originally posted by What Exit?

I think that is called sympathetic magic or maybe just pathetic, I forget.

---

There is a difference?

Quote:

---

Originally posted by The Falling Reverend

Former clerk Here.

Lottery/scratch off players are the bottom rung of the convenience store customer ladder. The worst are the ones playing on a "system". The type that asks what number the ticket is on, how many winners have been cashed in, when was the last time someone bought one, what color was the car of the person who last bought a ticket, so on and so forth.

---

Yeah...WTF is the difference between #2 at $2 and #38 at $2?

gambler: Shit, you changed the cards on me.
cashier: <fake laugh> We do that to confuse you.
me: It makes no difference as long as the price is the same, move on retard.