Nerdy jokes

The bartender says "We don't allow faster than light neutrinos in here."

A faster than light neutrino walks into a bar.

Real life conversation from the Stamp/artifex home:

artifex: I made tabbouleh!
OCS: Is it plain, or does it have all the mint and stuff?
artifex: It has mint and parsley and everything else.
OCS: I want to try it plain once. A tabbouleh rasa.
artifex: That's just plain bulgur.
OCS: It may be, but this is my house and I'll talk however I please.

A superconductor walks into a bar. The bartender says "we don't serve superconductors here." The superconductor leaves without putting up any resistance.

There are 10 types of people. Those who understand binary and those who don't.

Three statisticians go hunting. A deer runs by them. One shoots just ahead of the deer, and the other shoots just behind it. The third one shouts, "We got it!"

What is yellow, bent, and completely normed?

- A Bananach space.

Quote:

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Originally posted by OneCentStamp

Real life conversation from the Stamp/artifex home:

artifex: I made tabbouleh!
OCS: Is it plain, or does it have all the mint and stuff?
artifex: It has mint and parsley and everything else.
OCS: I want to try it plain once. A tabbouleh rasa.
artifex: That's just plain bulgur.
OCS: It may be, but this is my house and I'll talk however I please.

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That's magnificent.

Quote:

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Originally posted by Rube E. Tewesday

The bartender says "We don't allow faster than light neutrinos in here."

A faster than light neutrino walks into a bar.

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A neutrino walks into a bar and keeps going

Quote:

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Originally posted by Elendil's Heir

Three statisticians go hunting. A deer runs by them. One shoots just ahead of the deer, and the other shoots just behind it. The third one shouts, "We got it!"

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I liked this one so much I actually repeated it to people today.

Quote:

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Originally posted by Elendil's Heir

Three statisticians go hunting. A deer runs by them. One shoots just ahead of the deer, and the other shoots just behind it. The third one shouts, "We got it!"

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I laughed.

I didn't make it up, but I'm glad you like it!

Want to hear a joke about potassium?
K.

Know any good jokes about sodium?
Na.

A calculus limerick:

(Integral t² dt
From 1 to the cube root of 3)
Times (the cosine
Of (3p/9) )
= ln (the cube root of e)

Just stole these from the current SDMB joke thread:

Two physicists are driving home from a conference. It happens to be Erwin Schrödinger and Werner Heisenberg. All of a sudden a police car turns on its siren behind them. Schrödinger pulls over. The policeman walks over to the window and asks him: "Do you know how fast you were going?" Schrödinger says "Of course, officer, I know exactly how fast I was going!" Heisenberg moans, "Great, now we're lost."

The policeman thinks that these two characters are acting somewhat suspiciously. "Do you mind if I take a look in your vehicle?" he asks. "Go right ahead," say the two scientists. The officer comes back to the dirver's window: "Did you know you have a dead cat in your trunk?" "I do now!" says Schrödinger.