Your Eleven Year Old is Pregnant - What Now?

Inspired by this news story.

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An 11-year-old girl in the Northeast recently gave birth to a baby boy, the girl’s family told Fox News.

"My daughter and (her) baby are fine, and the baby is absolutely beautiful," said the mother of the 11-year-old girl.

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This is clearly a very unfortunate situation. Leaving aside the question of how the child got pregnant in the first place (which would seem to indicate the possibility of rape), what on earth would you do if you found yourself and your child in this situation? As the article states, there are several health risks if the girl carries the pregnancy to term. But what if she is pro-life? What if you are? What if she wants to continue the pregnancy and keep the baby, but you do not have the financial or other means to raise another child? If you disagree with her choice, how far would you go to carry your point?

If I found myself in this situation, I would lobby very, very hard to get my daughter to have an abortion. I'd feel awful about it, but the potential risks to her health at that age would just be too much. This wouldn't be a matter of not wanting another kid or not wanting to be a grandparent or even protecting her from the unpleasantries of having a kid early in life. It would simply be a pure health issue.

I'd adopt the kid I guess.

Well it would be even harder on my daughter with her daddy in jail after I find out who the little bastard is.

It's a health issue. A fairly significant one, at that. A preteen simply isn't built to endure pregnancy.

I don't know if I would force the issue, but I certainly would recommend very firmly that an abortion be carried out. I might curl up in a little ball and pretend everything is fine, though. Yeah, that'd be my strategy.

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Originally posted by Homer Simpson

During the exam pregnancy, I'll hide under some coats, and hope that somehow everything will work out.

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Get abortion (too many health risks for child of that age to have a baby). At eleven, I would act in the child's best interests, which given the child's age, does not necessarily mean doing what the child wants.

And have the Cesario prosecuted.

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Originally posted by Glazer

Well it would be even harder on my daughter with her daddy in jail after I find out who the little bastard is.

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Originally posted by Muffin

And have the Cesario prosecuted.

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Would your answer change if it was a boy close to her own age?

For those of you saying you would want your daughter to abort - what if she doesn't want to?

The reason this topic is interesting to me is because of the dilemma it presents between a woman's (in this case a female child's) right to reproductive freedom and body autonomy, and the lack of ability for a person so young to be able to make a truly informed decision.

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Originally posted by Feirefiz

Would your answer change if it was a boy close to her own age?

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Yes. A 10 or 12 year old, OK, or perhaps even a 13 year old, but more than that and all bets are off.

I don't think that most 11 year olds have the capacity to make a well reasoned decision in such a matter, so I would act on her behalf even if it were against her wishes. Her health would come first.

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Originally posted by Myrnalene

For those of you saying you would want your daughter to abort - what if she doesn't want to?

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Screw her.

No wait, that's the problem. Okay. It doesn't matter what she wants, as an 11 year old she doesn't have the capability to care for a young child. Also add to this the medical risks.

If it were a tumour she didn't want removed for some reason, that decision could be vetoed due to her age. This is a milder form of that.

General rule of thumb I use, assuming average maturity and average intelligence -- 16 let the child decide; 14 let the child decide unless there is a threat to the child's well being; 12 listen to what the child wants and try to accomodate, but make the decision for the child based on the child's well being; under 12 listen to what the child wants, make the decision for the child based on the child's well being, and don't worry too much about whether or not to accomodate unless there is good reason. Of course a great deal depends on the maturity and intelligence of the child, and any external factors that might be weighing on the child.

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Originally posted by Feirefiz

Would your answer change if it was a boy close to her own age?

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If he where close to her in age he might get off with just a severe beating.

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Originally posted by Muffin

I don't think that most 11 year olds have the capacity to make a well reasoned decision in such a matter, so I would act on her behalf even if it were against her wishes. Her health would come first.

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Exactly. If she's going to grow up to hate me forever because I had her get an abortion rather than go through an incredibly dangerous pregnancy - fine.

At least she'll be alive to hate me and be grown up.

Eleven years old is a child. When I was eleven, I could barely be trusted to make my bed.

I'm late to the party as usual - cursed time zones! I agree with previous posters - get that kid an ABORTION NOW, simply based on health issues.

But just for the sake of argument, what if the pregnancy itself were not a health hazard? I'd still strongly consider an abortion; socially and emotionally, 11 is too young to become a mother, even if my husband and I became the de facto parents.

It would be a very difficult choice, however. I am very very very very pro-choice and have zero issues with anyone choosing to have an abortion. But if I knew my daughter's health would be unimpaired and that I could care for the child.....? I'd probably still insist on abortion, but it would be traumatic.

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Originally posted by Myrnalene

For those of you saying you would want your daughter to abort - what if she doesn't want to?

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She's 11. She does not have the rationality or capability to make that decision as I suspect no 11 year old has the ability to comprehend the implications of the concepts of life and death with any real gravity. That is not her decision to make. It is not your job as a parent to always make a child happy, it is your job as a parent to always make them healthy and safe and to find the father and feed him alive feet first to a pen full of starving hogs.

I'd beg the heavens that she doesn't understand yet what's really going on and that she just understands that she has to go to the doctor so we can make her better again like you would explain any major illness or medical procedure.

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Originally posted by Bella Swan

(which would seem to indicate the possibility of rape)

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Ummm.

Since I guess you wanted to talk about the hypothetical nature of this case, and even then, just the decision of whether or not to go through with the pregnancy I'll stick to that. If my eleven year old daughter was pregnant I would take her to more than one doctor then make a decision with the girl's mother which would primarily involve the safety of my daughter.