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Thread: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

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    aka ivan the not-quite-as-terrible ivan astikov's avatar
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    Default Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    All these calculations and stipulations he made for the planets and other cosmic entities were done without any description of the medium they travelled in, other than it was a "vacuum". Aren't we just accepting his explanations because we haven't got a better one?

    This whole idea of space as a "vacuum", pisses me off anyway. Wouldn't this entail our universe being in an enclosed space? If I had my own vacuumed contraption and somehow flicked a frozen pea into it, would it go into its own pretty little orbit, or would I need some of that gravity stuff? Why doesn't an object with no momentum just "sink to the bottom" of our universe?

    Go on, tell me it doesn't have a "bottom"!

    Curse you, Universe, and your complicated mysteries!
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    No U

    Love and kisses,

    Isaac Newton

  3. #3
    Content Generator AllWalker's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    OMG physicist-pwn.

    Hey Newton, way to come to the erroneous conclusion that gravity travels instantaneously rather than at light speed!
    Something tells me we haven't seen the last of foreshadowing.

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Hey--that whole "Einstein" thing is a fad. Pretty soon (any day now) they'll figure out that there is an ether and that I was right all along. Oh sure, there's some limited apps for that E=MC[sup:137e7cir]2[/sup:137e7cir] stuff, but overall, my laws of motion rulez and Albert E. droolz.

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    Content Generator AllWalker's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by Isaac Newton
    Time and space are absolutes, doink doink
    Um, no.
    Something tells me we haven't seen the last of foreshadowing.

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by Isaac_Newton
    Hey--that whole "Einstein" thing is a fad. Pretty soon (any day now) they'll figure out that there is an ether and that I was right all along. Oh sure, there's some limited apps for that E=MC[sup:21quorwh]2[/sup:21quorwh] stuff, but overall, my laws of motion rulez and Albert E. droolz.
    Sez you, Newton, you wig-wearing pussy. You couldn't have laced Bert's boots, nevermind understood his E=MC[sup:21quorwh]2[/sup:21quorwh] theorem, you great big poser!
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    No U!

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    All your relativity R belong to us.

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    Content Generator AllWalker's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Anachronism!
    Something tells me we haven't seen the last of foreshadowing.

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by Isaac_Newton
    No U!
    Isaac, u r moar pwnd, just admit it!
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  11. #11
    Content Generator AllWalker's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    the dude got his arse handed to him by fruit
    Something tells me we haven't seen the last of foreshadowing.

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    Oliphaunt
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    Go on, tell me it doesn't have a "bottom"!
    OK. It doesn't have a "bottom".

  13. #13
    aka ivan the not-quite-as-terrible ivan astikov's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by Harlequin
    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    Go on, tell me it doesn't have a "bottom"!
    OK. It doesn't have a "bottom".
    You'll be telling me it doesn't have a top next! :dub:
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

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    Oliphaunt
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    [quote=ivan astikov]
    Quote Originally posted by Harlequin
    Quote Originally posted by "ivan astikov":umaxtm3c
    Go on, tell me it doesn't have a "bottom"!
    OK. It doesn't have a "bottom".
    You'll be telling me it doesn't have a top next! :dub:[/quote:umaxtm3c]
    Your powers of precognition are nothing short of spectacular. It doesn't have a top.

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Does it have a "middle"? Aha, got you there. Where did it all start then?
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    Does it have a "middle"? Aha, got you there. Where did it all start then?
    Over there.

  17. #17
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by Harlequin
    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    Does it have a "middle"? Aha, got you there. Where did it all start then?
    Over there.
    See, it's this sort of vagueness I am objecting to!
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  18. #18
    Oliphaunt
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    [quote=ivan astikov]
    Quote Originally posted by Harlequin
    Quote Originally posted by "ivan astikov":33079wh4
    Does it have a "middle"? Aha, got you there. Where did it all start then?
    Over there.
    See, it's this sort of vagueness I am objecting to! :mad:[/quote:33079wh4]
    What vagueness? I'm pointing to a very specific location. Over there.

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by Harlequin
    What vagueness? I'm pointing to a very specific location. Over there.
    Coordinates, damnit. I want coordinates. Whatever happened to precision in the scientific process?
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  20. #20
    Sophmoric Existentialist
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    6 degrees north, 47 degrees east.

    Right there. Can't you see it, shining in the sun?
    Sophmoric Existentialist

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by vison
    6 degrees north, 47 degrees east.

    Right there. Can't you see it, shining in the sun?
    Point with your finger. That might help!
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  22. #22
    Sophmoric Existentialist
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    I am pointing with my finger.
    Sophmoric Existentialist

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Right, I see it now.

    So, isn't there an 'above' and a 'below' that middle? If 'everything' was expanding outwards at the same time, it could only make a spherical shape, surely, and from an outsiders perspective it would have a top and a bottom, like the Earth has a north and south pole?
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

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    Jesus F'ing Christ Glazer's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    Does it have a "middle"? Aha, got you there. Where did it all start then?
    Yes the universe does have a middle. In fact all it has is a middle. And it started everywhere all at once. 'Cause when it started everywhere was all the same place. So any where that vision points is correct.

    On the bright side: you really are the center of the universe.
    Welcome to Mellophant.

    We started with nothing and we still have most of it left.

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    Content Generator AllWalker's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    Right, I see it now.

    So, isn't there an 'above' and a 'below' that middle? If 'everything' was expanding outwards at the same time, it could only make a spherical shape, surely, and from an outsiders perspective it would have a top and a bottom, like the Earth has a north and south pole?
    The analogy given is dots on the surface of a balloon. When the balloon is tiny they are all at the same place, more or less. Blow up the balloon and the dots spread apart. Now, if the entire universe is contained within the surface of the balloon, every point is the middle, the universe expands away from every point and there is not top or bottom. There are now boundaries either, everything loops back on itself extradimensionally.

    Balloons are awesome.
    Something tells me we haven't seen the last of foreshadowing.

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    Jesus F'ing Christ Glazer's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Kind of like an old video game where you fly off one side of the screen and back onto the other side. But so big even light doesn't have time to go all the way around.
    When you look out in space you can never see an edge because the edge is future, all you can see is the beginning.





    The circle of the open end is a 2D slice of a 3D now.
    Welcome to Mellophant.

    We started with nothing and we still have most of it left.

  27. #27
    Resident Troublemaker beebs's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    This is making so much sense now. When all those over-the-top villains are doing their best to acquire some ultimate force to initiate the destruction of the entire universe, they're all just trying to pop other people's balloons.

    Bad childhoods -> super villains.

    BRB. I'm going back in time to give Kefka some smiley face balloons and prevent a World of Ruin.

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    M'kay guys. So 0 was the singularity, 1 was the rapid expansion of some gaseous proto-matter, 2 was the aggregating together of some of this matter, 3 was the formation of galaxies, and 4 and 5, the formation of stars and planets. Meanwhile, the distance from the 'beginning point' is getting greater all the time.

    Is this a reasonable simplification?
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  29. #29
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    So, isn't there an 'above' and a 'below' that middle? If 'everything' was expanding outwards at the same time, it could only make a spherical shape, surely, and from an outsiders perspective it would have a top and a bottom, like the Earth has a north and south pole?
    It doesn't. The Earth only has poles because it rotates, and the designation of one as top and another as bottom is arbitrary.

  30. #30
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    M'kay guys. So 0 was the singularity, 1 was the rapid expansion of some gaseous proto-matter, 2 was the aggregating together of some of this matter, 3 was the formation of galaxies, and 4 and 5, the formation of stars and planets. Meanwhile, the distance from the 'beginning point' is getting greater all the time.

    Is this a reasonable simplification?
    Kinda but not quite. It goes something like:
    1) Big Bang, probably
    2) Pure Energy
    3) Crude matter begins to form (loose quarks, etc)
    4) subatomic particles form (protons, neutrons)
    5) electrically neutral matter forms - electrons being captured by protons
    6) matter begins to clump together in big gaseous clouds
    7) clouds form things like stars and peanuts
    8) People invent computers, FTL and fire, in that order
    9) Matter demands representation and legal protection - threatens strike
    10) Pure maths dissolves some sodium, becomes slightly impure maths
    11) statistics no longer allowed, under pain of birth

    As for the distance from the "beginning" it's more accurate to say that each point is moving away from every other point.
    Something tells me we haven't seen the last of foreshadowing.

  31. #31
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by AllWalker
    Quote Originally posted by ivan astikov
    M'kay guys. So 0 was the singularity, 1 was the rapid expansion of some gaseous proto-matter, 2 was the aggregating together of some of this matter, 3 was the formation of galaxies, and 4 and 5, the formation of stars and planets. Meanwhile, the distance from the 'beginning point' is getting greater all the time.

    Is this a reasonable simplification?
    Kinda but not quite. It goes something like:
    1) Big Bang, probably
    2) Pure Energy
    3) Crude matter begins to form (loose quarks, etc)
    4) subatomic particles form (protons, neutrons)
    5) electrically neutral matter forms - electrons being captured by protons
    6) matter begins to clump together in big gaseous clouds
    7) clouds form things like stars and peanuts
    8) People invent computers, FTL and fire, in that order
    9) Matter demands representation and legal protection - threatens strike
    10) Pure maths dissolves some sodium, becomes slightly impure maths
    11) statistics no longer allowed, under pain of birth
    12) Fenris is born, thus validating the great universal plan and proving the maxim that "Systems in motion inevitably tend towards being awesomely groovy."

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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    13) Fenris dies, and maximum entropy follows quickly, leading to the destruction of the universe.
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  33. #33
    Resident Troublemaker beebs's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    My grand pappy passed away on account of entropy. And I don't take kindly to people making sport of those thermodynamico laws you think are so funny.

  34. #34
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Yeah, fuck you, Newton! Gravity sucks! If it wasn't for you and that damned apple I wouldn't have to worry about tripping and falling flat on my face!



    Quote Originally posted by AllWalker
    2) Pure Energy
    Great, now I can't get that stupid video out of my head. Grumble grumble.

  35. #35
    Jesus F'ing Christ Glazer's avatar
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by PonderThis
    Yeah, fuck you, Newton! Gravity sucks! If it wasn't for you and that damned apple I wouldn't have to worry about tripping and falling flat on my face!
    Don't be dissin' Gravity man. Gravity is da shit. He told the Universe to get bent and the Universe did it. Man even Chuck Fuckin' Norris don't mess wit Gravity.
    Welcome to Mellophant.

    We started with nothing and we still have most of it left.

  36. #36
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Quote Originally posted by Glazer
    Quote Originally posted by PonderThis
    Yeah, fuck you, Newton! Gravity sucks! If it wasn't for you and that damned apple I wouldn't have to worry about tripping and falling flat on my face!
    Don't be dissin' Gravity man. Gravity is da shit. He told the Universe to get bent and the Universe did it. Man even Chuck Fuckin' Norris don't mess wit Gravity.
    As one of Chuck's rep's, he has asked me to inform you to "remember that, when there is an incoming asteroid and you need someone to roundhouse it from the space station back where it belongs... pussies!".
    To sleep, perchance to experience amygdalocortical activation and prefrontal deactivation.

  37. #37
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    Default Re: Isaac Newton Was Full Of Shit!

    Hey Newton, you fucking alchemist! How do you explain the electroweak force, and why it has resisted attempts to be unified with gravitation? What about Hawking radiation, or the interaction of branes in 11-space? Where is your suckoffsopher's stone now?

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