The World According to AllWalker

[AllWalker]

or, How to abolish timezone differences.

Here is a rough sketch of the world as it is:


Yes, it looks very nice. But look at all that wasted space! I'm sick of all these timezone differences. I'm sick of saying "good night" at 3pm, and "good morning" at midnight. So, here is my plan to rearrange the continents:



See how much better that is?
*The timezones differ by about 8 hours at their most.
*Plane rides would be cheap and easy.
*Australia and New Zealand, the worlds oldest foes, will be separated.
*Great Britain and Europe are separated.
*The Middle East is tucked out of the way.
*Greenland is gone, but it could be brought back by popular demand.
*No matter how hard they try, Madagascar will be less able to quarantine themselves.
*If we get rid of the seasonal tilt as well, the weather will become much more homogeneous too.

Who is with me? We need to share the daylight at the same time. Timezones aren't fair - I will have slept of my hungover by the time you take your first TGIF drink. Will a few explosives and at least 3 Kryptonians, we can do this by...

Anyone? Hello?

Oh that's right - North America is asleep right now. Foiled again - damn you, globe!

[OtakuLoki]

I think that there has to be some landmass that's centered opposite the rest of these continents. So those of use anti-social types can still be asleep while the rest of you party on your coordinated schedules.

[CRSP]

Surely there's a mistake somewhere? You have the UK and Australia next to each other?

[beebs]

I'm closer to Australia, and further away from the homeland of my sworn enemies the Dutch.

Where do I sign?

[OneCentStamp]

Bring back Gondawanaland! Whoo-hoo!

[terrifel]

I see the potential for a smash Roland Emmerlich summer blockbuster.

HELICOPTER SHOT FROM OCEAN TO COASTLINE

V.O. In a world of endless change--

HELICOPTER SHOT ACROSS MOUNTAINS

V.O. -of shifting politics--

NEWS FOOTAGE OF RIOTS AND COMBAT

V.O. --expanding cities--

TIME LAPSE FOOTAGE OF SUNRISE ACROSS NEW YORK SKYLINE, URBAN TRAFFIC

V.O. --advancing technology--

SCENES OF STOCK EXCHANGE FLOOR, CROWDS IN TOKYO, PLANES LANDING AT AIRPORT

V.O. the one thing that has always remained constant--

AIRPORT CROWDS JOSTLE AT BAGGAGE CLAIM

V.O. --is the world itself.

PAN UP ABOVE AIRLINE TICKET WINDOWS TO LARGE ILLUMINATED WORLD MAP

V.O. ...Until now.

MAP FLICKERS AND GOES DARK

(SOUNDTRACK: "I FEEL THE EARTH MOVE" BY CAROLE KING)

QUICK SERIES OF IMAGES: BRIDGES AROUND MANHATTAN ISLAND TWIST AND COLLAPSE IN SEQUENCE; OFFSHORE OIL RIG SWAMPED BY VAST WAVE; PANAMA CANAL WIDENS INTO GIGANTIC FISSURE; ROCK OF GIBRALTAR SURGES THROUGH OCEAN, UPENDING CRUISE LINER

OFFICIAL AT NONSPECIFIC CRISIS CENTER, SPEAKING RAPIDLY INTO PHONE: It's unprecedented! Continental drift has suddenly accelerated a billionfold!

SHOT OF SAN FRANCISCO BAY WITH GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE IN FOREGROUND, HAWAIIAN ISLANDS PASSING BY IN BACKGROUND

HOT WOMAN SCIENTIST: What we're seeing violates every known law of plate tectonics! It's impossible!

CRISIS CENTER OFFICIAL: I'm looking at it right now!

SCENES OF PANICKING SOUTH CAROLINANS EVACUATING FRANTICALLY AS FRANCE APPROACHES

FLORIDA DETACHES, STRANDING CRISIS CENTER OFFICIAL AND HOT WOMAN SCIENTIST ON ONE SIDE, WHILE CRISIS CENTER OFFICIAL'S TEENAGE DAUGHTER AND FAMILY DOG ARE CARRIED AWAY

CRISIS CENTER OFFICIAL'S TEENAGE DAUGHTER: (REACHING OUT) DAAAAD!

CRISIS CENTER OFFICIAL: Maggie! NOOOOO!

SHOT OF UNIVERSAL GLOBE LOGO REARRANGING ITSELF INTO NEW CONFIGURATION

V.O. AND TITLE: PANGAEA. This summer, the map is crap.

[AllWalker]

*sigh*, yet again, a a movie about a global phenomenon and yet only focusing on the US implications...

... but I'd watch it. You win the internet, terrifel.

[featherlou]

Dammit, you've got Alberta way on the outside.

ETA: No, wait, I was looking at it wrong. That's okay then.

[Myrnalene]

Where is Ireland? It is included with the smaller islands or is it meant to be part of "Great Britain"?

[OneCentStamp]

Where is Ireland? It is included with the smaller islands or is it meant to be part of "Great Britain"?

I figured it was floating somewhere in the "space for smaller islands." Cyprus and Puerto Rico will be delighted at their new neighbor.