Post brief quotes from fiction/narrative/whatever

[Jizzelbin]

"Hey what's with you Rog? She was great, she was beautiful. She made me want to go out and buy rubbers!"

— Lethal Weapon 2

[Elendil's Heir]

Zoë: "Are we going in?"
Mal: "Only but a few hours out."
Wash: "Yeah, but remember the part where it's a trap?"

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

"The trouble with you," the detective [Paul Drake] told him [Perry Mason], "is that you go into too darn much. Incidentally, you're getting the reputation of being a legal wizard."
"How do you mean – a wizard?" Mason asked.
"They figure that you can pull a verdict out of the hat, just like a magician pulls out a rabbit," Drake told him. "Your methods aren't orthodox; they're dramatic and effective."

— Gardner, The Case of the Howling Dog

[Elendil's Heir]

Kaylee: "But how can you be sure Inara don't just wanna see you? Sometimes people have feelings. And I'm referring here to people."

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

"I don't think is Bolivians. I think is iust, neighborhood kyeds being choads."

— "NoHo Hank," S03E3, Barry, "ben mendelsohn"

[Elendil's Heir]

Mal: "Zoe, ship is yours. Remember. If anything happens to me or if you don't hear from me within the hour, you take this ship and you come and you rescue me."

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

"There are two compelling reasons a lawyer needs to avoid such clashes. First, when judges interrupt a cross-examination, it interferes with the flow of the lawyer’s questions. Second, whether it is the case or not, jurors will automatically believe you are doing something you should not be doing if the neutral judge is intervening. Both of these outcomes seriously limit a lawyer’s effectiveness and credibility."

— one of the *Perry Mason Story* novels...can't remember which. It might be *Case of the Curious Bride.* Hell, aren't they all?

[Elendil's Heir]

Mal: "Dear Buddha, please bring me a pony and a plastic rocket...."

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

"LIFETIME WARRANTY. If your merino briefs do not perform to your satisfaction, return them within 60 DAYS for a hassle-free refund, exchange, or replacement."

— some blurb-de-blurb about some merino wool undershorts

[Elendil's Heir]

Inara: "Mal, what are you doing here!?"
Mal: "You invited me."
Inara: "I never thought for a second you'd be stupid enough to come!"
Mal: "Well, that makes you kind of a tease, doesn't it?"

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

"If Rip Torn gave it to you, it probably fires real bullets."

— Barry S4E3, "you're charming"

[Elendil's Heir]

Mal: "She is a mite unpredictable. Mood swings, of a sort."
The Operative: "It's worse than you know."
Mal: "It usually is."

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

“I could send her a picture of herself sleeping, as a way of saying, ‘Hey, not cool, what you did to Sally.’ The whole point is to isolate her and make her feel like she’s going insane. Replace her dog with a slightly different dog. Change the furniture in her house so she thinks she’s shrinking. Basic stuff, mostly I learned in the military, some of it on a sub-Reddit. Basically you plant a seed and then they just hang themselves. So it’s super-nonviolent. But by the end, her brain will have eventually eaten itself."

— Barry

[Elendil's Heir]

The Operative: "That girl will rain destruction down on you and your ship. She is an albatross, Captain."
Mal: "The way I remember it, albatross was a ship's good luck, 'til some idiot killed it. [to Inara] Yes, I've read a poem. Try not to faint."

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

""But," explained Mason, patiently, "I have already talked that way
to you."
— "But you can't do it."
"Why not?""

— meh, one of the Perry Mason novels

[Elendil's Heir]

The Operative: "That is a trap. I offer money, you'll play the man of honor and take umbrage. I ask you to do what is right, you'll play the brigand. I have no stomach for games. I already know you will not see reason."
Mal: "The Alliance wanted to show me reason, they shouldn't have sent an assassin."

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

"Perry Mason took advantage of their preoccupation to walk with swift strides to the telephone booth. He jerked open the door. "Drop down to the floor, Rhoda," he said.
"I can't. There isn't room."
"You've got to make room. Turn around facing me. Get your back flat against the wall under the shelf that the telephone's on... That's it...Now double up your knees. That's fine.""

— a *Perry Mason* novel (the one I've been reading now on-and-off...unfortunately can't remember the title).

[Elendil's Heir]

"Meanwhile we’ll sacrifice to Liberty. Remember, O my friends, the laws, the rights, the generous plan of power delivered down, from age to age, by your renowned forefathers (so dearly bought, the price of so much blood). O let it never perish in your hands! But piously transmit it to your children. Do thou, great Liberty, inspire our souls, and make our lives in thy possession happy, or our deaths glorious in thy just defense.”

Joseph Addison, Cato (1712)

[Jizzelbin]

"Well, it’s the sign that makes up the part of your chart called the Ascendant, which is at the cusp of the 1st house. Cusp is an astrological term used to describe the lines between the Sun signs and the lines between the houses."

— some astrology website. eh, shuddup, it's fun! and chicks dig it!

[Elendil's Heir]

The Operative: "I have a warship in deep orbit, Captain. We locked onto Serenity's pulse beacon the moment you hit atmo. I can speak a word and send a missile to that exact location inside of three minutes."
Mal (showing the pulse beacon he's brought with him): "You do that, you'd best make peace with your dear and fluffy lord."

Serenity

[Jizzelbin]

“I’ve seen your type before. Flashy. Makin’ the scene. Flouting convention.”

— Seinfeld (broke link in link to avoid preview feature, and therefore clutter. Amusing scenario though, as one recalls even dimly.)

[Elendil's Heir]

"I could drop you like a bag of dirt."

Elaine Benes to Frank Costanza, "The Little Kicks," Seinfeld

[Jizzelbin]

"But I saw you push the women and children out of the way in a mad panic. I saw you knock them down. And when you ran out, you left everyone behind."

— Seinfeld, "The Fire." (Yes we had a building-wide fire drill at work last week and it was amusing....to stand around baking in the hot sun until the only person with the key to turn off the alarm, who happens to work at the far end of the building, probably 300m away, one of the head maintenance dudes, finally got around to ending that instructive exercise....jokes were made....Costanzas were identified).

[Elendil's Heir]

"But I don't wanna be a pirate!"

Jerry Seinfeld to Kramer, "The Puffy Shirt," Seinfeld