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Thread: Worst annoyances ever IRL

  1. #1
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Default Worst annoyances ever IRL

    Yeah, so there's Trojan Man, but he doesn't really exist.

    Mainly, I was housesitting for a day or so far in the 'burbs, next to a middle school/junior high/whatever you call it.

    Fucking kids and their stupid outside shit. What is that, like recess or something? Every fucking few hours?

    You can indeed play a game without shrieking constantly.

    It's called golf.

    Play it, you fucking cretins.

  2. #2
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    And it's not just the exuberance -- it's the THINGS they say that are ridiculous, and stupid. I guess they must repeat them from some toothless hillbilly relatives who spit them out around them.

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    Oliphaunt Rube E. Tewesday's avatar
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    Right now, I'm thinking the biggest annoyance I've ever had is trying to deal with life while the giant gas bubble from my latest retinal detachment surgery ever so slowly decreases in size, meaning my right eye vision is pretty much the bubble and what can be foggily discerned through the bubble.
    Or maybe the biggest annoyance is the eyepatch I'm wearing to try to deal with the first annoyance, which is as uncomforatable as all get out.l

    Hmm...

  4. #4
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    That sounds like shit Rube. I hope you're feeling better soon.

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    Oliphaunt Rube E. Tewesday's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by spitz View post
    That sounds like shit Rube. I hope you're feeling better soon.
    Thanks, spitz. I gather I've got weeks of this to go, but with luck I'll end up with at least some vision in my right eye, instead of the blindness I was heading for without surgery.

  6. #6
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Dude you get to be like "awesome dad" while u wear your eyepatch. Kids must think it's cool!.

  7. #7
    Elen síla lumenn' omentielvo What Exit?'s avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Rube E. Tewesday View post
    Right now, I'm thinking the biggest annoyance I've ever had is trying to deal with life while the giant gas bubble from my latest retinal detachment surgery ever so slowly decreases in size, meaning my right eye vision is pretty much the bubble and what can be foggily discerned through the bubble.
    Or maybe the biggest annoyance is the eyepatch I'm wearing to try to deal with the first annoyance, which is as uncomforatable as all get out.l

    Hmm...
    Do you feel compelled to say "Argghhh" and "Aye Mateys"? Have you gone parrot shopping? Avoid the Norwegian Blues, they pine of the fjords as you know.



    Hope you recover swiftly and fully, good luck.

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    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by What Exit? View post
    Hope you recover swiftly and fully, good luck.
    Ditto -- I don't mean to trivialize serious surgery by ignoring it, but that's a pretty bad one. Glad to hear it was caught early, at least.

    Second worst annoyance -- I am sweating like a pig lately. I mean, just a lot. It's one thing if ur wearing gym clothes, but to have street clothes completely soaked, it's not that good.

  9. #9
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Fucking kids. And adults with weedwhackers. Bunch of stupid asshole, they should shut the fuck up.

    The worst is the kids, though -- the adults I can curse at and threaten to end them, but I can't really do much, conscionably, about the kids. Just complain bitterly about the noises they make.

  10. #10
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    conscienably. Wait, how do you spell that? this is really bothering me.

    eta -- I'm serious. I'm getting to Melanie Lynskey-levels of ready-to-blow. You guys are all pretty smart lawyers, and I'm a good speller -- this is going to be a bad problem over here.
    Last edited by Jizzelbin; 25 May 2015 at 10:42 PM.

  11. #11
    Oliphaunt Rube E. Tewesday's avatar
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    Just say "In good conscience".

  12. #12
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Yeah, but I wanted the other word! I think that may not be an actual word. "Conscionably" seems about the best. Yes, I know there's the internet, but I'd prefer to use my OED and Webster and stuff -- not handy at the moment.

    ETA OK fine, "in good conscience" is fine. But it still lacks the adverbial flavor I want.
    Last edited by Jizzelbin; 26 May 2015 at 09:56 PM.

  13. #13
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    You really omnibussed that phrase, jizzleguts.

  14. #14
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Oh, you are fucking made of pure dick.

    Omnibus *this*, you mofo!

    I got your "adverbial flavor" right here.
    Last edited by Jizzelbin; 26 May 2015 at 10:20 PM.

  15. #15
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    In good conscience?

  16. #16
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by spitz View post
    In good conscience?
    No! In bad conscience, TrojanMan.

    Like, the worst conscience possible.

  17. #17
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Omnibussible!

  18. #18
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    You need to turn this omnibus YES!

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