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Thread: Clothing advice thread for non-tools

  1. #51
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Here's one: obviously, I'm not a fashion guy nor a visual guy in general, but what's the idea behind double-breasted suits? Is that to make dudes look taller? I'd not go for that, but I'm a kind of a curious nature, so what's the deal with that thing?

    That's why I went for the raincoat I went for, rather than a trenchcoat. Just kind of, you know, regular.

    Also, I had a disappointment at CostCo -- they had some Levi 514 (?) so, 36x34, but they were too tight around the thighs. I could spend thirty bucks at Ross and get some fashion-forward jeans for probably less money.

  2. #52
    Oliphaunt Rube E. Tewesday's avatar
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    Nah, it's not to look taller, it's to look cooler.

  3. #53
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Rube E. Tewesday View post
    Well there's getting ahead of yourself ... I assume that means jumping...
    After reading this whole thread, I'm guessing he was getting head from himself...

    *wanders off*

  4. #54
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    The tennis racket or the BJ?

  5. #55
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    Quote Originally posted by Rube E. Tewesday View post
    Nah, it's not to look taller, it's to look cooler.
    Well, I guess everyone knows which side you hang on.

    Hey, Humphrey Bogart rocked the 2x breasteds, so I'm not criticizing.

  6. #56
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Jizzelbin View post
    The tennis racket or the BJ?
    The thick lumpy custard. It oozes.

  7. #57
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Sounds like somebody is hungry for a delicious creampie.

  8. #58
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by spitz View post
    Quote Originally posted by Rube E. Tewesday View post
    Well there's getting ahead of yourself ... I assume that means jumping...
    After reading this whole thread, I'm guessing he was getting head from himself...

    *wanders off*


    Yep, that's exactly what I do (that is SFW, AFAIK -- it's a ten-second clip from the parody show *Robot Chicken*).

  9. #59
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Well, I don't know why I was dragging my heels on doing the elbow patches. It took like five minutes to tack one on. I can always go back and do it right, and do the other one for symmetry.

    See? When you stop trying to do it right, and just do it "good enough," things are a lot easier.

    Only broke one needle. Unfortunately it was my last needle.

    Also, I have officially sewed on all pants buttons and coat buttons (piece of shit Cellini overcoat, I had to immediately redo the buttons as soon as I got it. I guess the Koreans were off their kimchi that day).

    Now all that's left is repair the pockets on a camelhair blazer, and do a better job on this suede patch on do the other one.

  10. #60
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Question: I was thinking of buying a Navy blazer (with dark plastic buttons)+charcoal flannel plants and a navy suit.

    I think I should buy a navy suit, some charcoal pants, and the jacket can double as a blazer.

    Thoughts?

    Also, probably should buy better dress shoes. Brown lace-ups seems to be more versatile.

    Also, red silk tie. Don't bother arguing, I'm going to buy one.

    Thoughts on knit ties in general?
    Last edited by Jizzelbin; 23 Apr 2015 at 02:08 PM.

  11. #61
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
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    That all sounds fine. If your pants, shirt and jacket will all be solid colors, as it sounds like, I encourage you to get a striped or patterned tie (red, if you have your heart set on it, although light blue, green or yellow also look good IMHO).

    Not a big fan of knit ties myself. To each their own.

  12. #62
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Well, I'm not sure about the patterned ties -- basically I'm just trying to buy stuff that will last me through the next ten years, and so that's why all this "Navy blue" and "charcoal flannel" and shit.

    Anyway, I hate shopping, and I'm a poor bachelor, so I want to make that dollar holler.

  13. #63
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    I think I might just grab a knit tie, since I'm in a shopping mood. In addition to a red silk tie. So, what color? (There are only two -- blue or red).

  14. #64
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    Should I buy a replica of (a) Booger's "High on stress" t-shirt or (b) Jack Burton's *Big Trouble in Little China* shirt. Yes, I'd wear it.

  15. #65
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    Knit tie??? Do you live in a retirement home or something? What's wrong with a normal one, or silk? I recently bought a red silk, it blazes against my cobalt blue dress shirt I got from Russia. Also have some duller ones. And black is the most versatile colour for shoes etc.

  16. #66
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
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    Yes, a red tie on a blue shirt usually looks good. I'm not a fan of knit ties myself.

  17. #67
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    You people have no taste! Booger!

  18. #68
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    Quote Originally posted by spitz View post
    Knit tie??? Do you live in a retirement home or something?
    I thought it would look snazzy, duh!

  19. #69
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    You might as well glue a doily to your face.

  20. #70
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by spitz View post
    You might as well glue a doily to your face.
    More like your mom's face.

    Stop quoting me you fecking cretins -- AFAIK nobody has me on ignore and nobody's going to erase my posts. So there's no problem.
    Last edited by Jizzelbin; 22 May 2015 at 09:19 PM.

  21. #71
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    Quote Originally posted by Jizzelbin View post
    Quote Originally posted by spitz View post
    You might as well glue a doily to your face.
    More like your mom's face.

    Stop quoting me you fecking cretins -- AFAIK nobody has me on ignore and nobody's going to erase my posts. So there's no problem.
    Until now. They'll strip you naked and go to work on you with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch.

    That's what your mom said.

  22. #72
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Maybe she'll crochet a shawl for you, jizzle wizzle.

  23. #73
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Oh, you are fucking dead, spitz.

    Don't wait for it -- it's coming.

    You are a big fucking sheila --- and you're going to get it right in the end.

  24. #74
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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  25. #75
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    And she could decoupage your wooden furniture with daisies and daffodils and love hearts. Squee!

  26. #76
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    There is no "squee" in "me."

    You fucking faggot.

    Say the words!

  27. #77
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Then she'll braid your back hair and do your nails for you.

  28. #78
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    Quote Originally posted by spitz View post
    Then she'll braid your back hair and do your nails for you.
    wo


    That sounds kind of good.

    Wait. I don't want my nails done.

  29. #79
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Then she'll put a pink frilly pillowcase on your pillow, and give you a nice warm glass of milk before you go beddy-byes.

  30. #80
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Stop being such a little bitch, spitz!

  31. #81
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    I'm a man and I deserve a man treatment!

  32. #82
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Don't get upset, grampa. You'll break a hip.

  33. #83
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    It's all in the reflexes.

    Where's my truck?

  34. #84
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    And also, Egg-foo Jung -- you are fucking dead, you hillblly astronaut. I am going to end you, motherfucker!

  35. #85
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Buckle up your seatbelt, you hick son of a bitch, because it's take-off time. One way ticket!

  36. #86
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Yes, yes, of course you are. How are those knit ties going?

  37. #87
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    I'm a classy guy! Going great! How's your sister's face?

  38. #88
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    What is wrong with the mods around here? You and me both should have been booted off a long time ago.

  39. #89
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Jizzelbin View post
    What is wrong with the mods around here? You and me both should have been booted off a long time ago.
    You fucking monkey-looking Australian. Eat my anus.

  40. #90
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Oh, is "dingus" the correct term?

  41. #91
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    I'll call the nursing home, see if you left your meds there.

  42. #92
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Yeah, I'll swing by your sister's house on the way home.

  43. #93
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Yeah I got a "man treatment" right here, fancy boy.

  44. #94
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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  45. #95
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Getting back to your roots! I like it.

  46. #96
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Yep. Same way I root your mum.

  47. #97
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Yeah, well she'd like it -- she likes all kinds of short-dicks.

  48. #98
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    Yes, they remind her of you.

  49. #99
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
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    Like father like son.

    Dad? Is that you?

  50. #100
    Mi parolas esperanton malbone Trojan Man's avatar
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    OK you win. I needed the brain bleach first. Blech!

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