come true, that is unless you are having those disturbing dreams about Condoleezza Rice again.
When I was a child, I ________________
come true, that is unless you are having those disturbing dreams about Condoleezza Rice again.
When I was a child, I ________________
was chosen to represent my district in the Hunger Games, but I was eliminated in the first ten seconds because I accidentally stepped off my disc too early and got blowed the hell up.
One thing Republicans and Democrats can agree on is ___________________
"You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."
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that Ralph Nader is a tool.
Yes, I'm still seething about 2000.
Be sure to look both ways before _____
doing both of those things
Wise men say ____
very little, in my experience, while morons won't shut the hell up.
If I were king for just one day, _____________
"You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."
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I'd give Hatshepsut a billion dollars.
When the going gets tough ___________________
, the tough try to figure out how to earn a billion dollars to then give to Hatshepsut.
For my second billion dollars, I think I'll _____
repeat what I did to get the first million.
All is fair ___
in love, war, and political campaigns, as we're about to learn all over again.
Hitler, Tojo and Mussolini really just should have _____
stayed in bed.
For every action, ___
some righteous fool on the internets is indignant about it, and will happily tell you why.
If I had a nickel for every time ____________________
someone should have given me a dime, I'd have half as much money as I actually do.
Buying a lottery ticket is ______________
my last, best chance for financial security.
Whenever I check the weather _____________
lady out on the TV news, her impressive and sustained weight loss makes me feel guilty about the extra poundage I cannot shed.
I was innocently minding my own business when ___________________
Gloria Allred held a press conference to announce that she was going to sue me for $10 million.
I wish all those TV lawyers would _____
be replaced by space cowboys or magicial adventurers.
The first thing I saw in the forest was __________________
a giant bear licking his lips and grinning at me.
Giant bears really ought to _______
unleashed at a Tea Party rally.
I don't know if I should be embarrassed or not, but _________________
I paid for this red velvet cloak, and by God I'm going to wear it.
Whenever I see a horse, I _________________
uncontrollably shout, "Fuck your Mitsubishi!"
With the help of my trusty blender, the _______________
So now they are just dirt-covered English people in fur pelts with credit cards.
door-to-door encyclopedia salesman who kept bothering me will now keep my family in spicy sausage for many years to come.
If you're going to eat spicy sausage, _______
save some for me.
I'm tired of always being the one who has to ___________________________
clean up the bone fragments.
The combination of orange juice and dried milk really __________
So now they are just dirt-covered English people in fur pelts with credit cards.
contributed to an interesting feature wall when I brought it up
Blesséd are the cheesemakers ____
Last edited by Trojan Man; 07 Jun 2012 at 03:00 PM.
and all producers of dairy goods, I'm pretty sure I heard Our Lord and Saviour say.
If Jesus were around today, ________
he'd have an awful lot of explaining to do.
Whenever I'm feeling blue __________
I stop watching the Smurfs.
When all is said and done, _____
wait five years and give it a gritty reboot, preferably directed by Christopher Nolan or someone like that.
The difference between a preference and a fetish _________________
"You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."
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is that my "preference" is a harmless quirk that is no one's business but my own, where as your "fetish" is unspeakably gross, as are most activities that somehow involve Walmart.
Are you trying to say that _________
my 10-foot-tall statue of Moloch is somehow offensive? This is why I hate Homeowner Associations!
When darkness fell ___________________
due to his comically oversized and in no way suggestive horns, it took two production assistants to help Mr. Curry and his muscle suit to stand back up.
Wise men say only fools rush in, _________
"You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."
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but that's just because they think they're wise.
Ed Wood's movies certainly __________
suck more than Edward's movies.
For every action ____
there is a non-zero probability it will be repeated 23 posts later.
I used to think you were a nice person until ________________
I got out and actually met some nice people, and frankly they leave you in the dust.
No true Scotsman _______________
"You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."
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would refuse a deep-fried Mars bar, you fiend!
When I saw the sign, I __________________
had to touch the wet paint.
It's so cold, _____
the penguins keep nicking my thermals.
I was splashing in the puddles when ________________
In the land of the blind, the one-arm man is king.
a really big guy with splash marks on his pants grabbed me and punched me, and I really don't remember much after that.
If you need help, just ____________
stop being so needy!
If Hatshepsut sees another repeated sentence in this thread, ______
she will quite possibly hunt down and kill us all. Slowly.
Yo mama so fat, __________
she'll eat anything, even the end of this se
I really felt a bit outside my comfort zone when ___________________
the weasels began gnawing through my underwear.
I'll confess that after I heard what Nancy had done, I ___________
So now they are just dirt-covered English people in fur pelts with credit cards.
resisted the urge to push her at once into the Grand Canyon only by remembering the oath I swore to my dying Uncle Sydney, who (don't ask me why, because he snuffed it before I could ask him) actually thought that Nancy was something other than a waste of organic matter.
I just wish that old coot Uncle Sydney had ________
not embarrassed the family with all the sexual harassment law suits pending against him when he died.
My dream vacation consists of ________________
a goat and a watermelon.
If everybody looked the same, ____
having sex with yourself would gain a whole new meaning.
While flipping burgers on the Barbeque, ________________
In the land of the blind, the one-arm man is king.
I thought I noticed what might be a human pinky in the meat, so I quickly slipped it into a bun and handed the burger to my least favorite relative.
What are you staring a ME for, I'm not the one who ______________
came to the family reunion dressed as a Muppet!
I may not have much, but at least I have ____________
a necklace made from the ears and molars of those who have wronged me.
I'm not saying the dude was gay, but ___________
"You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because I'm on nitrous."
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