+ Reply to thread
Page 18 of 18 FirstFirst ... 8 14 15 16 17 18
Results 851 to 882 of 882

Thread: Finish my sentence!

  1. #851
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    Edna! Edna! The hen party has begun! Keep sentries on high alert."

    Nice thing about having Arthur Fonzarelli and Dean Martin as role models is that __________________________________________________

  2. #852
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    , along with Anthony Fauci, Frank Sinatra and Antonin Scalia, you have a substantial fraction of the Italian American Hall of Fame in your corner.

    The last time I visited the IAHOF, the admission charge had gone up to ten bucks. Naturally, I __________________________________________

  3. #853
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    found an ethnic-looking woman, borrowed about ten children from a local schoolyard, and went with her and them to the office to complain loudly

    The only time you can text twice in a row to a woman is when ______________________________________________

  4. #854
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    you texted something so shockingly offensive the first time that you have to do immediate damage control.

    My flying car's turbofans are a little louder than usual; I'm thinking maybe ________________________________________

  5. #855
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a ’64 Impala.

    The only bad thing about drinking Black Bush at a bar is _____________________________

  6. #856
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    when some big, ugly biker guy comes over and says you were making eyes at his skanky biker girl, and you were, but you didn't think he'd noticed, and he says he hates anyone who drinks Black Bush, and you just know that all the sweet talk in the world ain't gonna make this go away.

    When that happens to me, well, naturally I say a little prayer and then just _____________________________

  7. #857
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    lie back and think of England: it's always a good ride.

    Saying to a literal drag queen in full drag, with whom one is close friends, about some interlopers on the pool table her, I and two others were playing, "Meh, bunch of faggots," should not have entailed __________________________________________________

  8. #858
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    an armed attack by the local branch of the Second Amendment LGBTQI Pool League.

    This Christmas Day, unlike all previous ones, I finally got around to __________________

  9. #859
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    being consumed by annoyance at thin-skinned people.

    The best response to an inappropriate slur in a public place is to say, "Oh yeah, well _______________________"

  10. #860
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    : I'm rubber and you're glue - anything you say bounces off me and sticks to you!" Then stick your tongue out at them to underline the message: I am a mature adult.

    I've often asked Pee-wee Herman for advice on how to deal with the perils and pitfalls of modern American life, and all in all I've found that he ____________________

  11. #861
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    only cares about three things: his bicycle, Dottie, and Speck.

    I thought about dressing up as Richard Speck for Halloween, but then someone said _____________________________

  12. #862
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    , "Aren't there more recent and more readily-recognizable serial killers you could pretend to be?"

    The good people of Belgium know and love me, especially because when I'm there, I always _____________________________________

  13. #863
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    make sure to taunt the Flemish in French, and gird myself for a beer-fueled fistfight: trust me, they love it.

    The great thing about having a boxer's fracture in one's dominant hand is that __________________________

  14. #864
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    it gives you a convenient excuse to have a Sherpa with you at all times to do dominant-handed things for you.

    Interviewing and hiring Sherpas can be a pain in the ass, it's true, but trust me, ___________________

  15. #865
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    I saw a former she-Sherpa today and, believe you me, they're pretty intensely passive-aggressive, bless their hearts.

    The one thing talking over the two-way radio has over using the megaphone to give direction is that it ___________________________________

  16. #866
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    can be a bit more private, as well as not annoying the neighbors or causing any nearby souffles to fall.

    If Betty White had made it to her 100th birthday, bless her, I really hope she would've __________________________________________

  17. #867
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    invoked an ancient gypsy curse against Elon Musk, after accepting an offer of a ride into space: you see, she would have been disappointed at the duration of her flight.

    Involuntarily subtle facial ticks sometimes occur when encountering __________________________________

  18. #868
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    someone who mistakes tics for ticks.

    This time next week I should be in Cairo, Egypt, where I naturally plan to eat drink 'way too much, ride a camel, see the pyramids and ___________________________

  19. #869
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    correct the spelling of the people while burying one's head in the warm lap of a sun-toasted native.

    The only days I refrain from muttering "I'm getting too old for this shit" are days when _________________________________

  20. #870
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    Danny Glover is nearby, and says it first.

    Mel Gibson has a thing for strawberry ice cream, oddly enough, and has been known to _____________________________________

  21. #871
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    favor the Neapolitan, because he is a shocker chocolate lover.

    I always say "Yo <insert name >! <insert quick question>?" at high volume and with maximum expedience because ___________________________________

  22. #872
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    that's how I learn what I gotta know in a hurry. Word.

    The next time somebody uses the word "shenanigans," I swear to God, I'm gonna _________________________________

  23. #873
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    seriously consider going down on her, freshly washed or not, because that word is indispensable!

    TNP should probably avoid smoking some of a 28% THC joint at home, for future reference, because ______________________________________

  24. #874
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    he lacks a medical marijuana card and has no plans (or need) to get one.

    TNP has seen this classic movie moment about shenanigans:

  25. #875
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    And wonders WTH who or what is a "TNP," exactly?

    The only reason I've avoided getting into fistfights in public recently is that my would-be assailants are _______________________________.

  26. #876
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    so addled, they mix up the "Finish my sentence" threads with the "The next person" threads!

    When I first saw Super Troopers, the very funny Vermont cop comedy, I laughed so hard that ________________

  27. #877
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    I actually pistol whipped the next guy that [sic] said 'shenangians.'

    Once upon a time, like, say, recently, it was said that shouting "WOOOHOOOO!!!!" was redolent of _____________________________

  28. #878
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    the misty, lush morning mist drifting across an Irish meadow. Or was that Blawnox?

    I've long hoped to visit Blawnox, Pa. and sample its many cultural and artistic delights, but so far, _____________________________________

  29. #879
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    all I found was McClintock spanking Maureen O'Hara, and it was decidedly unalluring.

    When I bantered with a coworker whom I hadn't seen in a few weeks, I almost felt guilty about looking at her ass, in a discreet fashion; I then remembered that she __________________________________

  30. #880
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    gave me a sly smile and a definite wiggle when she last caught me doing it, and then I felt a bit better.

    I never have time to read the paper anymore. Instead, I _______________________

  31. #881
    Oliphaunt Jizzelbin's avatar
    Registered
    Jul 2013
    Location
    in a mouth
    Posts
    10,013

    Default

    occasionally pick one up for the crossword puzzle, and as material for making rudimentary hats.

    There is no good reason to avoid "flexing" by demonstrating extraordinary grit and skill, even when one's only audience are married, uninterested, or "involved" women, except but that __________________________________________________ __

  32. #882
    Member Elendil's Heir's avatar
    Registered
    Sep 2009
    Location
    The North Coast
    Posts
    23,199

    Default

    one should never do it for cardiothoracic surgeons, French chefs, school crossing guards and/or traffic cops who might thus be distracted from their important duties.

    Tomorrow night I'll be having a Zoom chat with some high school friends; I sure hope, for once, that George doesn't _____________________

+ Reply to thread

Posting rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts