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Thread: Finish my sentence!

  1. #701
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    figure out how to save some of each paycheck in a coffee can.

    Because when The Man knows what ___________________________________.

  2. #702
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    your wife is smoking, he's sure to try to tax it.

    As I've told my last three wives, __________________________

  3. #703
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    "you don't have to menstruate every single day."

    Women, rags, and rag-pickers: now there's ________________________________.

  4. #704
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    a group I really don't wanna overgeneralize about!

    General Motors, General Mills and General Patton all _______________

  5. #705
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    had some fantastic (-ally awful) ideas about industrial design.

    The best thing to do if you have some GI problems is ___________________________.

  6. #706
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    to drink a gallon of pickle juice as fast you can. Works every time!

    I'm always happy to give bad medical advice; in fact, _____________________

  7. #707
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    pickle juice is something people drink.

    The first time I saw someone pickle brine, I about __________________________.

  8. #708
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    lost my lunch.

    Have you seen my lunch? I'm pretty sure ________________

  9. #709
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    there was either a woman or a baby in that soup.

    I eat any kind of soup, no matter _____________________________.

  10. #710
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    how often the CIA threatens my cats (in secret messages they send through my tooth fillings) if I choose the chunky chicken vegetable.

    I swear, if the CIA doesn't lay off me, I'm gonna ____________

  11. #711
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    tell them their boss has a bunch of pills, a handgun, and a bottle of Listerine on his desk.

    The only person who ever put "CIA" on her business card was _____________________________.

  12. #712
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    my Great Aunt Edna, but what the hell, other than a stint in the OSS during World War II, she was usually delusional.

    The last delusional episode I had, ______________________

  13. #713
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    I was convinced that every fertile woman had a lady-boner dedicated to me.

    The second one starts generalizing about women's behavior, _______________________________.

  14. #714
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    you can be assured that you're missing some key exceptions, 'cause they're all different, amiright?

    I think it's about time I took up mountain-climbing again, because ______________________

  15. #715
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    there are some really good lady climbers who make a good sauce.

    It takes a special kind of woman to enter the __________________________________

  16. #716
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    gladiatorial games of Ancient Rome, once the time machines are up and running again.

    I had, have and/or will have a time machine once, but _____________

  17. #717
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    my pet Sherman spilled purple drank all over the controls, for he is, although docile, an imbecile.

    Mr. Peabody insists men should not wear shorts that are ___________________________.

  18. #718
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    open at the crotch, as it is unacceptable in certain cultures. Well, most of them, actually.

    I hate it when I have to go buy crotchless panties for my Great Aunt Edna, because ________________________

  19. #719
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    she makes me try them on and model them for her, and then complains that I stretched out the fabric.

    Dogs should not have pet boys, because ______________________________.

  20. #720
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    sooner or later a pretty girl from some post-apocalyptic underground city is gonna end up eaten.

    I like to play Verdi while I'm ____________

  21. #721
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    wearing a kicky neckerchief and having a Campari and soda on the terrace.

    Give a woman a dog, a tub of peanut butter, and she's ___________________________.

  22. #722
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    gonna demand three million dollars, two stoats and a machete.

    I immediately got that reference to a pretty girl from some post-apocalyptic underground city; it was from _____________________

  23. #723
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    well, there was a pool in it somewheres, and also something about science fiction.

    When I open a tray of "Hot Italian" fresh sausages, the last thing I want is her to be __________________________________.

  24. #724
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    holding back from making any tasteless and offensive Dago jokes.

    (It was from A Boy and His Dog - sf, yes, but I don't remember anything about a pool)

    Tasteless and offensive ethnic humor has its place, I think, especially when ____________

  25. #725
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    those people have it coming and deserve a good ribbing.

    The only time "good ribbing for those people" is acceptable to say is _________________________.

  26. #726
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    when you're going to a BBQ and don't mind having sticky fingers at the end.

    I never drink beer with BBQ; instead I'd rather have __________________

  27. #727
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    a nice juicy watermelon, with a good woman to feed me smoked brisket while I recline.

    Pulling pork is something that should only be done __________________________________.

  28. #728
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    when accompanied by a squad of Latvian paratroopers, three Japanese ninjas and an Inuit bowler.

    Inuit bowlers know all the best _________________

  29. #729
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    ice flows upon which to set those who don't obey league rules.

    Best reason to join an amateur "sporting" league: ______________________________ but then, _______________________________.

  30. #730
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    free beer... you'll recognize everyone at that week's AA meeting.

    I would never go to an event just for free beer; of course, _____________

  31. #731
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    there's beer and then there's beer.

    The phrase "sticky fingers" is oddly _______________________.

  32. #732
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    evocative, even if you're not a Rolling Stones fan: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sticky_Fingers

    I don't own that album, but _______________

  33. #733
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    that's because I'm totally hating on good music.

    Marianne Faithfull probably did _______________________________.

  34. #734
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    not pay extra for the surplus "L" in her last name.

    When I want to buy an extra letter, I just ____________________

  35. #735
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    call Vanna White while pretending to be Mickey Rourke: lots of heavy breathing and sudden angry outbursts, and some fits of spastic crying.

    Before I admit to sexual misdeeds, I like to ____________________________.

  36. #736
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    keep pretending to be Mickey Rourke and blame everything on the traumatic experience of filming Angel Heart.

    The last time I saw a scary movie like that, _____________________

  37. #737
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    I began to worship Robert De Niro, like a god.

    The day I stop recycling neutral-smelling clothes between laundry days is the day ________________________________________.

  38. #738
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    any of my six wives actually offers to do laundry for me.

    Having six wives isn't all beer and skittles; sometimes _________________

  39. #739
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    they start acting all womanly and cat-fighty, and not in the good way.

    Still, six wives is better than six husbands, because ___________________________.

  40. #740
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    I'm a heterosexual dude and have no interest in having one husband, let alone six. I mean, jeez.

    Thinking about it, though, if I had six husbands, I'd probably _______________

  41. #741
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    attach leg-irons and compel them to perform manual labor I don't wish to perform.

    The nice thing about women and manual labor is that ________________________________.

  42. #742
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    they're usually more than happy to let you do it.

    I hope to be able to sleep in tomorrow morning, but ______________

  43. #743
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    there's these damned things I gotta do.

    I once called a woman "The Beast of Yucca Flats": she _____________________________.

  44. #744
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    insisted I have sex with her much more attractive nympho sister, but I found some lame excuse not to.

    Now that I think of it, my excuse ____________

  45. #745
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    probably saved me from syphilis.

    Of all the STDs, the one that _____________________________.

  46. #746
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    I really don't want to get is Altairian crotchrot. And to think one doctor told me it didn't even exist!

    Next time you're on Altair IV, be sure to _____________

  47. #747
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    make sure you're not mistaken for Alsatian.

    Alsatian-French are a bunch of ___________________________.

  48. #748
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    wonderful people, without exception, and I just wish we could clone the lot of 'em so there'd be even more.

    The next time I visit Alsace, I must remember to ___________

  49. #749
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    not bring up the topic of religion, and not make fun of their accents.

    The nice thing about Alsatian beer is that ______________________________.

  50. #750
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    I've never had any.

    Alsatians can get particularly touchy about beer, religion, clown porn and ____________________

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