To all my Goombahs

[What Exit?]

Italian Loan:

An Italian walked into a bank in New York City and asked for the loan officer. He told the loan officer that he was going to Italy on business for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000 and that he was not a depositor of the bank.

The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan,
so the Italian handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank.

The Italian produced the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest.

Later, the bank's president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the Italian
for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral for a $5,000 loan.

Then the employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the
bank's underground garage and parked it.

Two weeks later, the Italian returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of $23.07. The loan officer said, 'Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?'

The Italian replied: 'Minga! Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?'

FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Always bring the food..

FRIENDS: Will say 'hello'.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Will give you a big hug and a kiss.

FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Call your parents Mom and Dad.

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FRIENDS: Will eat at your dinner table and leave.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Will spend hours there, talking, laughing, and just being together.

FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd's back-ends that left you.

FRIENDS: Will knock on your door.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, 'I'm home!'

FRIENDS: Will visit you in the hospital when you're sick
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Will cut your grass and clean your house then come
spend the night with you in the hospital.

FRIENDS: Are for a while.
ITALIAN FRIENDS: Are for life.

Disclaimer: This is something my Dad sent me, it made me laugh, much of it rang true to me. But I don't of course subscribe to all of it.

[The Original An Gadaí]

Why are there so many Italian Americans called Tony?

They used to tattoo "To NY" on their foreheads before they got on the boat.

[CatInASuit]

I was expecting something from Super Mario Bros instead

[Sarahfeena]

Ha ha, I liked the joke. You could probably insert a bunch of other ethnic groups in both parts of the e-mail and it would still ring true.

Like, I remember there was an ad for the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding that read something like "My Big Fat Italian Jewish Chinese Spanish Greek Wedding."