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Well, maybe. Not quite sure of how the conversation would turn out, but I enjoy White Russians — a meal in a glass — so, I could hardly refuse.
Probably end up getting in a fight with Walter, and probably profoundly annoyed at The Dude's laziness. The Dude is housebroken, though, so better company than my uncle. Probably have to commandeer the record selection — a little Creedence goes a long way. A very long way. Like too much a long way.
TNP can remember the last time he or she was surprised and impressed by somebody IRL for initiating a friendly conversation, making eye contact in a direct fashion, and so forth.
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Yes, last weekend, when a guy I thought hated me turned up on my doorstep.
TNP has had an unexpected visitor in the past week.
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No. When you invite toxic people into your house, just like vampires, they can hardly be said to be unexpected.
TNP know how to reduce workplace contractors (opposed to regular employees) to their assigned duties with a minimum of surly effort.
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Nope, ain't nobody knows that.
TNP is going out of town this weekend.
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Nope, sticking around home.
TNP will be going out for lunch today.
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Sure, as of today, I'll be going out for a few beers. Fine, maybe if I can trick this woman into coming out with me I'll have some of that fancy-shmancy solid food too, so she doesn't feel like a total porker.
TNP is unsure of the purpose of wearing ladies' white pants, and disapproves.
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I approve of anything you want to wear, Jizz, including ladies' white pants. Show a little more self-confidence, would you?
TNP could do with some coffee right about now.
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Negative, ghost rider, the pattern is full. This ghost rider is pretty sure beer and water is going to be just fine until to go to sleep.
TNP will say that white sundresses with a light floral print on certain ladies are much better than ladies' white pants.
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On ladies, definitely. But I don't want you to crimp your sense of self-expression.
TNP knows a cross-dresser.
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Not really. I've seen the regular man-woman hookers on the street corners, and maybe a utilikilt is a bit of a cross-dressing thing. Well, arguably a good number of women are somewhat cross-dressing in the Kate Hepburn/Annie Hall "butch" kind of thing, but I don't think that counts anymore these days. Unless one is talking about Faye Dunaway in The Wicked Woman, co-starring Marina Sirtis.
TNP has more than a dozen projects he or she hasn't even touched for months.
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No, not that many, fortunately. Maybe three or four, depending on how you count 'em.
TNP knew that Marina Sirtis played a troubled young Italian woman in the Granada TV Sherlock Holmes series before she was cast for ST:TNG.
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Yes, you mentioned that somewhere. I confess I only made it about ten minutes into it. I mean, I'm into Marina Sirtis and everything, to some extent, but where were her white ladies' pants? And where was Faye Dunaway (sp?) whipping her while Sirtis was topless?
TNP is way behind on current TV watching — as in only a vague idea of what's on these days.
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Oh, definitely. Shows I have never watched go into their triumphant final season all the time.
TNP spends more time finding out what's on Netflix than watching Netflix.
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No, but I don't watch much on Netflix in any event. Right now, though, I'm two episodes behind on both Succession and Sharp Objects, each on HBO.
TNP often watches stuff on HBO.
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No. The closest thing to a "premium channel" show I ever watched as an adult was Californication, which was on Showtime, I believe (although I watched it online). I don't think I've ever watched another show on either HBO or Showtime as a child or an adult, except maybe if a friend had some videotapes of some season of a show.
TNP is kind of annoyed at how Netflix "dumps" all of a season of a show at one time — not that I care, since I'd be watching it according to my leisure anyway, but it just doesn't seem as much "fun."
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Yeah, I wonder about that. I guess House of Cards was the first to do that, and it caught on.
TNP has seen the original British version of House of Cards, and loved it, as I did.
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No. In fact, I had no idea. I'm sure if you liked it there was some merit, but I can only imagine some very dry stuff about barristers, I assume a PM, a bunch of MPs who probably had extremely perverse sexual fantasies involving cricket bats and fagging their classmates at public school, or perhaps their special batmen at Sandhurst.
TNP thinks Emmanuel Macron is showing the right amount of sangfroid dealing with his American inferior, but is somewhat disappointed at the lack of that classic French wit. It's not as though his social and intellectual inferior would understand a jest from an actual person, so what's the harm? It would amuse the press, and nobody would be the wiser.
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Definitely so.
Here's the intro to the British House of Cards. I think Ian Richardson is even better in the lead role than Kevin Spacey - he's a more delightfully, joyously evil presence. The opening scene sets the stage for the race to succeed Margaret Thatcher as Prime Minister: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSWrTG8sBRI
TNP will be taking a day off tomorrow.
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No. I'll just make an appearance, see if I can sniff around the girls, keep things moving forward. I'd rather save up my "credit" for later times when I truly need it. I will be Uncle Joe, moving kind of slow, at the junction, but that's OK.
Oh, the UK House of Cards does sound excellent. I confess I lost interest in the US House of Cards after Kate Mara got offed, although Spacey was very good.
TNP has ever left a restaurant/bar because the service was abysmally slow. Extra points if TNP muttered something unprintable while leaving quietly and calmly. ETA "abysmally slow"? No, I have no idea what that means. How about just "unacceptably slow"?
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Left, sure. Don't think I muttered anything unprintable, but may have said the odd thing out loud.
TNP gets bored easily.
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Well, I suppose so. I get tired of things pretty easily if there is no "there" there. You know, like Oakland.
TNP thinks "being bored" and "just plain tired of _______" is pretty much the same thing.
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Sure, it can be. Sometimes boredom is due to the absence of anything to do, even something you might otherwise be tired of, though.
TNP has looked something up in a dictionary in the past month.
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Yes. I couldn't remember the French word for "moose" (well, an elk, really, on the continent). L'orignal I don't actually have a bilingual FR dictionary, that I know of, just monolingual FR ones, so I used the fake internet stuff. It checks out.
TNP has had to return to a place just before getting home to pick up something he or she forgot recently, and was not pleased.
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Not recently, thank goodness. I hate that.
TNP thinks absinthe is over-rated.
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No idea, never had it. Closest thing are probably the various pastis, like Ricard and stuff like that, which I don't really care for either — it takes like an hour to choke one of those nasty, anise-flavored liqueurs down, even when made the traditional way with a small amount of sugar and water.
TNP is slightly concerned about almost driving off the road (barely) on an old, pot-hole-riddled major local highway on a daily basis. Perhaps there's some merit to not going 60 mph on a 40 mph shitty road at 0400, and not being fully caffeinated.
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Yeah, some of the roads around here are pretty bad.
TNP has lost a hubcap on a bad road.
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Probably. I was and still am a shitty driver.
TNP turns "light on for safety" and doesn't nerd-gate in the passing lane, and yet is still perturbed by offenders.
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All true.
TNP wants to go to Chicago, as I did last weekend.
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Not so much. I don't think it's my kind of town, although I have nothing against it especially.
TNP greatly prefers to not drive when doing a tourist-visit of a town — kind of limits the places, especially in the US, one can visit, but is much simpler.
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True, although if someone will do the driving for me, I'm cool.
TNP takes public transit daily.
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False. Only rarely do I use the local light rail or bus system.
TNP is still waiting for his or her jetpack, dammit.
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Pfffft. Levitating boots. Only way to cheat death while rock climbing.
TNP would destroy barehandedly an intruder who sought possession of his or her box fan.
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Don't particularity care about fans, but hate intruders, so I guess, yes?
TNP has more than three credit cards.
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Nope, exactly three (Chase Visa, LL Bean MasterCard and Target MasterCard).
TNP has bought something at Target in the past year.
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I think I bought something in the past year at their "grocery" section in the one semi-recently opened downtown, but, no, I guess not really. They used to be a go-to place to pick up things like men's clothing (jockey shorts, socks, that kind of thing) a few years ago, but just haven't felt the urge. Their loss-prevention is intense, I recall from when I worked there a summer during high school — I think I prefer going places where I'm not presumed to be a criminal.
TNP thinks a French/whore's bath covers many sins. Of all kinds. Including the sin of not bathing like a regular human.
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I, uh, wouldn't know. So... false.
TNP has never been in a Paris whorehouse.
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True. I actually don't know any real brothels there, just clip joints along Pigalle where I'm sure you can get whatever you want, what with prostitution being legal and everything. Lots of hookers on the street, though, who I assume have some kind of relationship with the very many cheap hotels up around there.
TNP has never seen a "lady of the night" who was at all appealing physically.
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Not that I could be sure actually was a prostitute, no. All of those whom I knew or strongly suspected of being prostitutes were pretty high on the Skank-o-Meter.
TNP saw an actual rabbit last night.
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No. There are plenty around, but not last night.
TNP isn't so into going all Mr. McGregor on rabbits in the wild — they are vicious creatures who feast on human blood when they grow to gigantic size, but they're OK as long as you don't grow carrots in your garden.
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I have got more benign on the subject of pests since I've grown up and left the farm, so I guess, yeah.
TNP thinks rabbit fricassee is pretty tasty, all the same.
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Not at all. Maybe I'm a fussy eater, but I'm not into eating rabbits and squirrels and such. Horse? Absolutely fine. I'd eat dog, and I've been tempted to consider eating human, when properly cooked. I suppose dunno is the correct answer, since I've never had rabbit, but the associations with it being a French hillbilly desperation food are too strong for me to consider.
TNP has "repaired" two or more cars with duck tape.
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Nope, never resorted to that.
TNP prefers black tape to gray.
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Absoltively. Works good to "fix" leather jackets, is relatively discreet on cars. Never go gray — bet on black. Always.
TNP enjoys a good mirth-filled, boisterous encounter with a supermarket clerk. Or has recently.
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I would probably enjoy that, but can't say I have ever had one of those in my life.
TNP has ordered basic groceries from Amazon.
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Well, false! Why get my perishables all effed up by ham-handed oafs, mixed in with diapers, kitty litter, and various "industrial-strength" solvents (each with varying degrees of leakage), when I can go across the street and have a good laugh with the gals at the store?
TNP has ever worked a job where (i) not only does he or she not give a damn (ii) but also, he or she observes pretty much nobody cares.
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There have been occasional incidents like that, and some people who took that attitude, but overall, no.
TNP saw the last Hunger Games movie and agrees with me that it was meh.
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No, I had no idea there was a new one out. The first one was ridiculous enough, so I agree that any of the follow-ups are even more ghastly. No, I don't need to see it to believe it — I'm 100% sure I'm right.
TNP would rather believe a woman he or she is interested is just having her "monthlies" than that she failed to respond to his or her uncharacteristically warm overtures. Alternate TNP: TNP has to deal with a regular stream of new co-workers, and thinks they kind of suck, just in general. <Fred Sanford>Bunch of dummies! Where's that Ripple wine? Elizabeth, I'm coming!</FS>
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No to both.
TNP personally knows at least three women or girls named Elizabeth.
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Not currently, I don't believe. Certainly in the past I've known women with the name or one of its nicknames It's a nice name. There was an awful queen of some remote northern island of that name, of tainted blood, and wicked ways, but it's still a fine name, and there's nothing wrong with it at all.
TNP uses regularly a pharmaceutical like aspirin or ibuprofen, for the analgesic effects, but isn't that happy about it.
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False. Now and then, and it doesn't bother me.
TNP will be going to New Orleans this weekend, just like me.