Saffron: "Mmm. You missed a spot."
Mal (frisking her): "Can't miss a place you've never been."
Firefly
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Saffron: "Mmm. You missed a spot."
Mal (frisking her): "Can't miss a place you've never been."
Firefly
"All these guys [Muhammed, Buddha, Jesus] had was their word, and they came from fucking nowhere. I’m not saying Nazareth is nowhere – I’m sure Jesus came from a very cool neighbourhood."
— Abel Ferrara (iconoclast film director)
Saffron: "You can't just leave me here on this lifeless piece-of-crap moon."
Mal: "I can."
Saffron: "I'll die."
Mal: "Well, as a courtesy, you might start getting busy on that, 'cause all this chatter ain't doin' me any kindness."
Firefly
"When the cast [of Buckaroo Banzai assembled at the Sepulveda Dam in Los Angeles to film the movie's end title footage, the music had not been written yet. To give them something to march to, a John Phillips Sousa march and Billy Joel's 'Uptown Girl' were played back on the location during the filming of that sequence."
— trivia site
Saffron: "This was all your fault, you know. I had the perfect crime lined up."
Mal: "Sure. You were gonna steal a man's beard."
Firefly
"$80 for a chippy? I can get a goddamn horse for $50!"
— McCabe and Mrs. Miller
Mal: "Saffron has a notion we can walk right in there, take the Lassiter [a rare antique weapon] right off his shelf."
Wash: "I'm confused."
Saffron: "You're asking yourself if I've got the security codes, why don't I go in, grab it for myself?"
Wash: "No. Actually, I was wondering... [to Mal] what's she doing on this ship?"
Firefly
"Navin! I'd love you if you was the color of a baboon's ass."
— The Jerk
Wash: "We're in space! How'd she get here?"
Mal: "She hitched."
Wash: "I don't recall pulling over!"
Firefly
"And if you want to battle me, you're putting loot down
I said it's root down, it's time to scoot down
Until I step up to the mic in my goose down
Come up represent from the upper west."
— Beastie Boys, "Root Down."
River: "She's a liar."
Jayne: "That don't exactly set her apart from the rest of us. The plunder sounds fun enough."
River: "She's a liar, and no good will come of her."
Jayne: "Well, as a rule, I say, girlfolk ain't to be trusted."
Firefly
"You're trying to tell me the FBI is going to pay me to learn to surf?"
— Point Break
River: "'Jayne' is a girl's name."
Jayne: "Well, Jayne ain't a girl! She starts in on that girl's-name thing [reaches into his pants], I'll show her good 'n' all, I got man-parts!"
Simon: "I'm... trying to think of a way for you to be cruder. I just... it's not coming."
Firefly
"Beat it, I'm reading the sports page. [...] I don't want you to get to know you me: I like being an enigma. Like a chink. Now scram."
— Great Santini
I love The Great Santini! The book more than the movie, mind you.
Paraphrasing:
"You know, as a Marine combat pilot, that you're having a good day when your enemies are running away from you, and they're on fire."
The Great Santini
"Why don't they make the whole plane out of joe rogan blowing himself?"
— amusing (imho) tweet by comedian Blaine Capatch
(Capt. Reynolds is working, against his better judgment, with a con artist variously known as Yolanda, Saffron and Bridget)
Mal: "No one's killin' any folk today, on account o' we got a very tight schedule, Yo-Saff-Bridg."
Firefly
"You just listen to the old Pork Chop Express here now and take his advice on a dark and stormy night when the lightning's crashin' and the thunder's rollin' and the rain's coming down in sheets thick as lead. Just remember what old Jack Burton does when the earth quakes, and the poison arrows fall from the sky, and the pillars of Heaven shake. Yeah, Jack Burton just looks that big old storm right square in the eye and he says, 'Give me your best shot, pal. I can take it.'"
— Big Trouble/Little China
Durran: "How long have you been with him?"
Mal: "Oh— pfft! We are not together."
Saffron: "He's my husband."
Mal: "Well, who in the damn galaxy ain't?!"
Firefly
“What, you think Becca’s going to be psyched that you brought a bottle of lube? ‘Oh, Evan! Thank you so much for bringing that lube for my pussy! I could never handle your fucking four-inch dick inside my pussy without your gigantic bottle of lube!’ These girls are 18 years old."
— Superbad
Saffron: "I'll do anything you want me to. You know how I can make you feel."
Durran (who has called the police): "Hmm. Please. You're embarrassing yourself."
(She spin-kicks him to the floor, knocking him unconscious)
Saffron: "I'm embarrassing? Who's the dupe on the floor?"
Mal: "I hate to bring up our imminent arrest during your crazy time, but we gotta go."
Firefly
"Then I realized I haven’t watched television in like five fucking years. Even if I were to watch a show, I’d have no fucking clue what’s going on. My memory’s full. You wake up in the morning, you put your shoes on, and you try to fucking walk a straight line. That’s it."
— Dave Grohl
Saffron (crying at the loss of her latest fake husband): "You must be loving this."
Mal (sadly shaking his head, then thoughtfully nodding): "Little bit."
Firefly
"SLATER: I'm buying you a beer, McLovin.
MICHAELS: I'm buying you one too. All you guys, take note. That's how you take down a motherfucker."
— Superbad
Saffron: "You won't tell anyone about me breaking down."
Mal: "I won't."
Saffron: "Then I won't tell anyone how easily I got your gun out of your holster."
Firefly
"When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, looks you crooked in the eye, and asks you if you paid your dues; you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol' Jack Burton always says at a time like that: "Have you paid your dues, Jack? Yes sir, the check is in the mail."
— Big Trouble/Little China
Simon (to Jayne, his patient): "No matter what you do, or say or plot, no matter how you come down on us… I will never, ever harm you. You're on this table, you're safe. 'Cause I'm your medic, and however little we may like or trust each other, we're on the same crew. Got the same troubles, same enemies, and more than enough of both. Now, we could circle each other and growl, sleep with one eye open, but that thought wearies me. I don't care what you've done, I don't know what you're planning on doing, but I'm trusting you. I think you should do the same. 'Cause I don't see this working any other way."
Firefly
"You're a very nosy fellow, kitty cat . Huh? You know what happens to nosy fellows? Huh? No? Wanna guess? Huh? No? Okay. They lose their noses. Next time you lose the whole thing. Cut it off and feed it to my goldfish."
— some movie. :cool:
Mal (sitting naked on a rock in the middle of a plain): "Yeah. That went well."
Inara (walking up behind him): "You call this going well?"
Mal: "We got the loot, didn't we?"
Inara: "Yes, but—"
Mal: "Then I call this a win. What's the problem?"
Inara: "Shall I start with the part where you're stranded in the middle of nowhere, or the part where you have no clothes?"
Firefly
"When asked by the New York Times to explain his creative process, Stallone remarked that he was 'astounded by people who take 18 years to write something.' 'That’s how long it took that guy to write Madame Bovary,' he added. 'And was that ever on a best-seller list? No. It was a lousy book and it made a lousy movie.'"
— some brief entertainment article about Sly Stallone
You know, I always enjoy Stallone's trenchant opinions on French literature.
Simon (at a sideshow exhibit): "Yep—it's a cow fetus."
Kaylee: "Guess so. It does seem to have an awful lot of limbs."
Simon: "It's mutated."
Kaylee: "But cow? How do you figure?"
Simon: "It's upside down."
Kaylee (tilting her head to one side): "Oh yeah. Cow."
Simon: "And I'm out twelve bits! I really know how to show a girl a... disgusting time."
Firefly
“Even if you were right, that would be one plus one plus two plus one, not one plus two plus one plus one.”
— Clue
Wash (seeing Simon and the inverted cow fetus): "Oh, my God, it's grotesque! Oh, and there's something in a jar."
Firefly
"Some Bette Davis picture, some goddamned Warner Brothers epic.
— Martha, I can't remember all the pictures that came out of the Warner Brothers."
— Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf, Nichols film
Wash (speaking loudly, slowly, and enunciating clearly to the cow fetus): "Do not fear me! Ours is a peaceful race, and we must live in harmony."
Firefly
"All right, so he got shot in the foot: is it a big fucking deal?"
— Goodfellas
River (unsuccessfully trying to eat a spherical treat that bobs from a string): "My food is problematic."
Jayne: "Girl's a mind-readin' genius, can't even figure out how to eat an ice planet."
Firefly
"Can you get us to Longview in twenty minutes? — Sure. An extra quarter tip!"
— The Out of Towners
Jayne (proudly wearing his mother's colorful home-knit cap): "How's it sit? Pretty cunning, don't you think?"
Kaylee: "I think it's the sweetest hat ever."
Wash: "A man walks down the street in that hat, people know he's not afraid of anything."
Jayne: "Damn straight!"
Firefly
"I am so wet now I couldn't be any drier."
— Sandy Dennis in The Out of Towners
Jayne (after Zoe and Mal open a coffin-sized box to find a body): "What'd y'all order a dead guy for?"
Firefly
"Sidney. Sit down, have a sandwich, drink a glass of milk, do some fucking thing."
— Midnight Run
Love that movie!
"I have no intention of dying now. But if I'm going to, allow me to choose where and how."
Col. Kurt Steiner, The Eagle Has Landed
"Never pass up a chance to have sex or appear on television."
— Gore Vidal
Zoe: "First rule of battle, little one… don't ever let them know where you are."
Firefly
"Hard Ten. A woman's best friend."
Dictionary of Gambling
Tracey (after Zoe kills an enemy soldier who was about to shoot him): "Thanks. I didn't know you were out there."
Zoe: "Sort of the point. Stealth - you may have heard of it."
Tracey: "I don't think they covered that in Basic."
Zoe: "Well, at least they covered 'Dropping Your Weapon So You Can Eat Beans and Get Yourself Shot.'"
Tracey: "Yeah, I got a badge in that."
Firefly
"I live on a lonely avenue. My little girl wouldn't say how do."
— Doc Pomus, "Lonely Avenue"
Mal: "They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself."
Firefly
"It ain't the years, it's the mileage."
— some movie, whatever