The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen left me absolutely cold. Hated it - long, boring and baffling.
TNP will name a very famous American prose fiction author about whom he or she has very positive thoughts indeed, and will explain why.
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The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen left me absolutely cold. Hated it - long, boring and baffling.
TNP will name a very famous American prose fiction author about whom he or she has very positive thoughts indeed, and will explain why.
Oh, without question, Henry James was not nicknamed "The Master" without reason. There are many problems in his apprentice works, many of which have been adapted for the screen if one likes that kind of thing. A lot of trans-Atlantic bullshit and whatever.
James was not a man of all seasons. In fact, I don't relate to his curious, and extremely odd anglophilia at all.
But he was, IMHO, the first and last American novelist to have, at least in his last novels, pounded the notion of what it is to be new into that thick American skull of America.
TNP prefers talking about abstract ideas to rude implementations thereof.
Actually, no. I'm usually more comfortable with the practical side of things than abstract ideas.
TNP has one major change he or she would make to the U.S. Constitution, if given the chance.
No. I mean, as far as enumerating the federal government's powers, maybe you could say something about the exact proportion of congress to do such-and-such, but my understanding is that once you start "fixing" little things to one's taste, the effects are unpredictable and it's probably better to leave it as it is.
All right, fine, TNP will say one thing that could be changed in the US Constitution without leaving wide gaps in consistency and coherence in the federal grant.
I would repeal the Second Amendment at once. People are dying every day due to a purposeful misunderstanding of what a "well regulated Militia" is.
TNP would like to visit Antarctica.
I'd like to spend time at the McMurdoo station. Probably few women of high quality to be seduced.
I can't resist:. So long as civilian peace officers are stripped of access to any arsenal, dictated by the federal government, I'd be ok with restrictions on civilian firearm use, with exceptions for hunting rifles and sporting handguns. Federal over sight could be the rule, and federal officers may be extended some access to an arsenal. Barney Fife? Not so much.
TNP thinks tv news is a horrid cesspool of loudmouth shriekers.
Too often, yes. "If it bleeds, it leads."
TNP knows and respects a particular current journalist.
Not really. I only read the WSJ once a week, and, perhaps deliberately on the editors' parts, they just report some of the facts of business in the driest of manners.
TNP thinks the most strident, opinionated people should be avoided IRL and in print. Exceptions can be made for fiction writers, but that's about it.
Yeah, I'm on board with that. Just shut up, know it all.
TNP feels that they are insufficiently grounded in The Great American Songbook.
Eh. I think I know just enough, which isn't much, and am not particularly motivated to know more.
TNP would go on a crewed mission to Mars if given the chance and a reasonable likelihood of returning safely.
Hell no. I can think of lots of people I'd send on a one-way mission to Mars, or the Sun, or wherever. Like people who play Christmas music before Christmas Day, or Jeff Bezos, or people like that. Just think about the stench of the capsule: stuffed full of neckbeards who are given carte blanche to defecate in their space pants and make endless references to the same dorky shit every day. There would be murder, and mutiny, and it would be glorious once the victor emerged, suffocating to death upon failure of an energy-gathering and distribution device.
TNP is not ever going to buy a different make or model of smartphone, unless his or her current model is discontinued. Even then, the new model would be mostly indistinguishable from the old one.
I tend to stick with the tried-and-true, and I like my current iPhone, so yes, that's probably about right.
TNP owns at least three Apple products.
If you count all the ones in my house as "owned" by me, yeah. We're an Apple family.
TNP would never buy a car without air-conditioning.
Absofreakinlutely. Nor a dwelling.
TNP expects to see fireworks tomorrow.
No. I expect to hear plenty of bullshit from the neighboring apartment complex. I hope something or someone is burned, and it better not be me or none of my shit. Good job not frightening your supposedly beloved dogs, also, you stupid cocksuckers.
TNP thinks Charles Bronson's character in The Great Escape had the toughest job among the prisoners. If not, TNP will say who did.
Having never seen the movie, alas, I just don't know.
TNP thinks I should see the movie toot sweet.
Of course! Today if possible. It's patriotic, fun, classic, and brings together Commonwealth, British, and American soldiers together. Not exactly a documentary, but it's a fun movie, although not much of a Hollywood ending.
TNP has bought chocolate milk recently (hint, it's pretty good as a mixer for whiskey).
Nah, haven't bought it in years.
TNP has bought gin recently.
Gin??? I refuse to drink gin if it short-dicks every cannibal in the congo. Well, you know, unless it's there and I can cut it with Rose's Lime Juice and some ice. That's a negative.
TNP has ever been called "captain" non-ironically and not as a slang, like "chief" or "sport" or so forth.
I don't think so, but I have been called "Colonel" (as I am one of the Kentucky variety).
TNP is celebrating, as I am, Independence Day today. Best wishes to all my fellow American Mellophanters!
Sure am. Celebrating by abstaining from food and waiting a few hours to take my next ibuprofen with milk. Or beer. Same thing, really.
TNP will take my advice and not go to a US grocery store today, for it is a madhouse. Or if TNP has already done such a thing, TNP will not be doing it again. For it is a madhouse. Not that there's anything wrong with it.
I will gladly take your advice, which makes good sense, but I didn't plan to go anyway.
TNP has been to Philadelphia in the past year.
No, actually have never gotten off the train through it.
TNP is going to Pittsburgh this month.
No, never been in Pittsburgh itself. Just sort of driving around the outside.
TNP didn't know until recently that they moved the famous Rocky statue at the bottom of the stairs instead of the top of the Art Museum stairs. Bonus points if TNP can explain why in hell they did that. Extra bonus points if TNP pretty frequently says "Yo, _____!" to get someone's attention.
'Cause that's where he ends up after his run, raising his fists in triumph? (And no, I rarely say "Yo, [anybody]!").
TNP has had rain fall on him or her today.
Nope.
Aside: it's been a while since I've seen the movie, but I'm pretty sure Rocky raises his arms up at the top of the stairs, not the bottom!
TNP is or has been mildly-to-moderately peeved at some changes in administrators at work, which seem to cross-discipline coincide with shitty little pro-tem people who don't know shit.
I have been before, but not lately, fortunately.
TNP can hear a coworker through the wall.
Generally not when my door's shut, but sometimes.
TNP is looking forward to payday.
Yep. Pretty much every day of the week I'll agree with that statement.
TNP can name a movie he or she can watch or has only watched in short segments of at a time. Pornos don't count, but some really bad or perhaps really good movie might. You make the call.
The Godfather was that movie for me, for a long time. I'd never watched the whole thing through until a few years ago.
TNP wants to see Yesterday, about the guy who is the only one to remember the Beatles.
Not really. I've heard of the movie, but not what it's about. Sounds like a good Twilight Zone episode, but it'd take a lot to make me search out a current movie and watch it, and I just don't feel like making the effort.
TNP hasn't intentionally listened to a tune performed by The Beatles in years and years (excepting curiosities like seeing the "rooftop concert" for Billy Preston's work), and isn't going to break his or her streak of abstinence anytime soon.
Far from it. It's a rare week that I don't listen to at least some Beatles. (The movie is good but not great, I'd say - some missed potential there).
TNP has a favorite Beatles song.
Yeah, I like "Blackbird," just because the harmonies/chords are a little unexpected. At least to my ear, it's a little bit off-center, and I like it. I like the original recording as well as Billy Preston's arrangement under his own name.
TNP will share an amusing anecdote about a jazz musician he or she has met or seen play, or encountered, or etcetera. Bonus TNP: what the hell is the "most good quote" from the movie Dirty Mary, Crazy Larry some cocktease on some other board is talking about? I've seen the movie a million billion times, and there's lots of "best lines" from that movie. Shitheads.
I heard Booker T. Jones play a few years ago in a small jazz club. He and his band had dinner beforehand in a small curtained room just off the main performance space. They then gave us a good concert but when I shouted in between songs, "Play 'The Cool Dude'!" he studiously ignored me. Here it is: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXuJs6D0X8Y
TNP likes that song.
Yes. I never heard that one before, that I know of. It's unmistakeably Booker T. on organ (or a very good copy of his sound and style). I'm guessing that was Al Jackson, Jr. on drums — kind of an interesting subtle take on the groove, little personalizations instead of just being a human metronome. I don't know if I'd listen to it on "repeat" for hours or try to cover it myself on organ, but it's worth hearing at least a few times.
I didn't know Booker T. ever played club dates — if it's any consolation, maybe he wasn't all that happy thinking about his huge, megastar past backing up everyone on the Stax label. Or it's possible he didn't remember the tune or it wasn't one of his favorites. Or possibly he has a standing policy about taking requests from honkeys in the audience. : )
If anyone hasn't already, there's a nice piece from NPR probably on YouTube of Booker T. sitting at the organ and showing some things — it's for a general audience, but for musicians it's like getting a private lesson on some stuff you'd probably never guess off the recordings alone. Not a concert, more of an interview plus some demonstrations, with video and everything.
TNP's greatest sin is a tendency to laziness, including procrastination.
Yes, I'm afraid so. I really fight it.
And who you callin' "honkey"...?!? ;-)
TNP is feeling a little too warm right now.
Nope. It's been cold as tits (relatievely speaking) for the past few days, and I'm glad to experience less attenuated solar radiation starting today. Bring it on, you honkeys!
[Oh, here's a link to the Booker T. bit on US National Public Radio. I haven't seen it again yet, but I think it's the same thing I'm thinking of. Check it out!]
TNP doesn't think "honkey" or "cracker" or "peckerwood" or the like are offensive; or at least they shouldn't be.
ETA Oh. OK, the Booker T was a bit more concert than interview but it's short. I noticed watching it this time through that what you see his left hand doing to change the speed of the Leslie speaker (it's a speaker cabinet with an amplifier that has a horn and a bass horn that rotate). Normally the switch is put on the front of the keyboard, it's like a toggle switch with a big knob attached to it. So, when you see Booker T reaching slightly below the keyboard to switch the speed of the Leslie (it can be fast spinning [tremolo], slower [chorale], or off [braked], but most of Jimmy Smith's great recordings only had "off/braked" and "tremolo"), that's what he's reaching for.
It could be a switch to a simulator device, or who knows what, but that's what he's reaching for frequently on the LH side of the keyboard under the organ.
It confused me too, like why thy didn't have the regular Leslie speed controls mounted to the organ where it usually is, but who knows.
Yes, any of those words could be offensive. I certainly wouldn't want to be called any of them, unless obviously (as here) in jest.
TNP knows, without looking it up, who Elanor the Fair was.
No. Is that from one of Chrétien's Arthurian tales? Sounds like it, but it's been a long time since I looked at those ancien français epics or abbreviated epics. In fact, I've never read Malory's English versions of these tales.
TNP...has the power....to envision...a weekend....full of running errands and doing houskeeping. For TNP is prescient af!
Elanor the Fair was Samwise's daughter from The Lord of the Rings: https://lotr.fandom.com/wiki/Elanor_Gardner
I could certainly envision that, but that's not the kind of weekend I had, as it happens.
TNP went out for lunch today.
Today? Not yet, but it is Taco Tuesday, so I shall have tacos. They started putting some nasty coleslaw-like crap on top of their carnitas tacos, so it'll have to be just hard-shell ground beef tacos. Barely adequate, but it's easier than making it myself or going through a drive-thru.
So, I yes, I will have gone out for lunch today. There is no question that the future perfect cannot solve. (ETA never mind, I get it: I was wondering why the "I will have <past passive infinitive>" construction uses the modal "will" for first person subjects, instead of the simple "shall," but I suppose it reflects the subjunctive nature in English of the construction. Anyway, I think that's probably the correct explanation.)
TNP has ever left a review on Yelp (dot com!).
Nope. I don't do online reviews except occasionally for books I particularly either hate or love on Amazon.
TNP has bought something on Amazon in the past week.
Yeah, I've gotten to be quite the Amazon addict, after realizing that my lengthy boycott wasn't hurting them and was inconveniencing me.
TNP uses Alexa regularly.
No, never have.
TNP knows, as I do, a young woman named Alexa who's kind of annoyed by her much-better-known AI counterpart.
No, but in an odd coincidence, I did overhear someone being called by her name "Alexa" just today. A van driver. I have no idea how she feels about that "home Jeeves" device.
TNP had an occasion to use the term "imaginary numbers" (I mean in the primary sense, you know, rad -1) recently in casual conversation.
No, and I can't really imagine a situation in which I would.
TNP is kind of in awe of what you can do if you have the maths.
Absolutely. Like, you know, go to the freakin' Moon: https://www.npr.org/sections/picture...comes-a-rocket
TNP is interested in the 50th anniversary of the Apollo 11 mission.
I suppose as much as the next person, but my interest in space is more on the Mercury program end of things. Probably just seen The Right Stuff too many times (yes, the book is better, but the movie has its little moments).
TNP finds cell phone/tablet document "scanning" "apps" to be extremely disappointing. Or would, if he or she ever used them.
I probably would, but I never actually have.
TNP prefers beer to wine.